I want to change my last name to my stepdad's.

[LC_2002]

Jurisdiction

Pennsylvania

Hello, I am wondering how I can change my last name to match my mom, stepdad, and two brothers. Before my mom married my stepdad she was married to my bio-dad and together they had the oldest of my younger brothers and I. After my mom married my stepdad they had two more boys currently aged 7 and 8 months. Over the years my bio-dad has been paying child support for my brother and I and gets visitation two weekends a month along with 21 extra days in the summer. Despite seeing him every month I don't see him as my father at all. He mentally abuses and manipulates my brother and I and his girlfriend is always giving us a hard time about our lifestyle and how my mom raises us (my brothers and I are cyber schooled). He also lives with his girlfriend, her son (14 y/o), her mother, and her slightly creepy uncle. I always dread going to his house but I go so my brother doesn't go alone. I know that since I am turning 15 in June I can probably opt out of going but my brother is turning only 12 in April and it is worse for him when he is alone with our bio-dad. Even though i see my bio-dad often, the only father figure I've ever had is my stepdad. And the thing is that my bio-dad will not cooperate at all. He will fight everything including name change or anything else. I don't want to hear that the answer is that it is impossible. I only want to know how it can be done the easiest way possible. I understand that it will be difficult but I hate hearing my name all the time because it reminds be of that jerk. Also, would it be possible for my stepdad to adopt me? Thanks in advance.

 

[adjusterjack]

It's not impossible. But it's not easy. Your mother will have to go to court and prove that the name change is in your best interest if she can't get the consent of your Bio-Dad.

Read this:

Name Change Brochure

As for your Step-Dad adopting you, that will also require the consent of Bio-Dad as well as your mother's willingness to give up that child support money.

I can tell you one thing about step-parent adoption. It doesn't take a piece of paper to make a Dad. I didn't adopt my ex's kids because the Bio-Dad wouldn't consent. But I raised them, they are both in their 40's and still my kids even without that piece of paper.

If your relationship with your mother's husband is Dad and Daughter, cherish it that way and express your fondness for him as often as you can.

 

[army judge]

You're 15 years old.
Your mother would have to seek a name change on your behalf.

If, however, you wait until your 18th birthday, you can easily do it yourself.

To change one's name in PA, you can ask the Court for an order changing your legal name from (Salty As Popcorn) to (Sweet As Sugar).


Changing your name in Pennsylvania is a fairly straightforward process and can usually be accomplished by the individual "Pro Se" (a person who represents him/herself) within 3 to 6 months. An attorney is not required, but may be able to more quickly navigate the process, especially if there are unusual circumstances concerning your petition(s).


You then use the court order to change the name listed on your birth certificate, US passport, social security card, PA driver's license, and other documents.

Pennsylvania Name Change

 

[KatDini]

And just so you know, you do not get a choice in whether or not to visit your father when you turn 15.

 

[leslie82]

Hello, I am wondering how I can change my last name to match my mom, stepdad, and two brothers. Before my mom married my stepdad she was married to my bio-dad and together they had the oldest of my younger brothers and I. After my mom married my stepdad they had two more boys currently aged 7 and 8 months. Over the years my bio-dad has been paying child support for my brother and I and gets visitation two weekends a month along with 21 extra days in the summer. Despite seeing him every month I don't see him as my father at all. He mentally abuses and manipulates my brother and I and his girlfriend is always giving us a hard time about our lifestyle and how my mom raises us (my brothers and I are cyber schooled). He also lives with his girlfriend, her son (14 y/o), her mother, and her slightly creepy uncle. I always dread going to his house but I go so my brother doesn't go alone. I know that since I am turning 15 in June I can probably opt out of going but my brother is turning only 12 in April and it is worse for him when he is alone with our bio-dad. Even though i see my bio-dad often, the only father figure I've ever had is my stepdad. And the thing is that my bio-dad will not cooperate at all. He will fight everything including name change or anything else. I don't want to hear that the answer is that it is impossible. I only want to know how it can be done the easiest way possible. I understand that it will be difficult but I hate hearing my name all the time because it reminds be of that jerk. Also, would it be possible for my stepdad to adopt me? Thanks in advance.

You can not "opt out" of going to visit your dad if he has court ordered visitation. If you have issues or concerns about a creepy adult you need to bring it up to someone. But you don't get to choose seeing your dad. Sorry. If he has a visitation plan your mom has to have you guys able to go and if she doesn't or you refuse to go, she can be held in contempt of court. Do you really want your mom to get in any trouble?

Your stepdad can file to adopt you BUT your dad has to approve it. I find that very unlikely to happen.

The most you can probably do is wait until you're 18 and legally change your name yourself. That's what my youngest brother did when my mom and her pos husband couldn't change it. (He was born of an affair and so he had my dad's name, my dad raised him and my dad was legally his father). So when he was 18, he changed his last name to his sperm donor's last name unfortunately.

It sucks to have a crappy parent but you're not the only one.