Husbands ex refusing visitation of kids because he will not give ADHD meds

[cbmarley]

My husband is currently active duty army at Fort Drum, NY. Over the past 5 months my husband has been having issues with his ex-wife dealing with his daughter being on ADHD medication. The issues are progressively getting worse. His ex-wife is now withholding visitation, and stating we must stay with his moms in Indiana when we come home to visit the kids (because my husbands mom has told his ex-wife she will give the meds to his daughter). My husband has NEVER supported medicated his daughter. There are other options for helping children deal with ADHD, but his ex-wife immediately jumped on the band wagon of medicating her daughter to make life easier for her. The visitation issues are just beginning to be an issue for the holidays (Christmas this year) because my husband has repeatedly told his ex-wife that he refuses to give his daughter medication because he believes it will do more harm than good in the long run. I agree completely with my husband. My husbands ex is going to allow an 8hr visit with his two children on Christmas Eve, and he hasn't seen them since September. Can my husbands ex withhold, or limit visitation of his children just because he refuses to give ADHD medication to his daughter? The other issue is that they currently have a divorce decree that states they have to jointly decided non-emergency medical care of their two children, and my husbands ex went ahead and put his daughter on ADHD meds without his approval. My husband and I were more than happy to have his daughter come live with us to help create a structured life to help her be successful without medication. Now we are dealing with visitation issues. I hate seeing my husband stressed out over seeing his children. What should we do so we don't have to spend a ton of money on a lawyer, or is getting a lawyer our only option?

 

[disagreeable]

Taking her to court for contempt is likely his only option.

 

[Proserpina]

Agreed. Dad may also want to get a second opinion about the ADHD if he has joint decision-making.

Got to warn you though - the courts generally err on the side of caution if there is a definite diagnosis and support medication, and Dad may find he has no choice but to administer the medication.

 

[army judge]

Taking her to court for contempt is likely his only option.

Yes, this is correct.

Alas, that won't happen unless you hire a lawyer.

If you can't afford to hire a lawyer, you can try to do it yourself, pro se!

That ain't easy, and will require him to learn the law.

Why him?

Because you have no dog in this fight, and only the aggrieved person can represent himself pro se, not by proxy.