follow up Advice

[tazzyboo202000]

HI everyone I asked advice before about custody issues with my child . I had a lot happen in the last year, my fiance dies suddenly last November and with out having his support it took me time to work up the courage to follow through with the mediation and start the process again to settle the custody issues with my child who is now almost 4 years old. My child is in school and I work at the school part time and am going to school full time. We had a mediation this past week he was there by phone as he still lives out of state. We came to an agreement of him having skype calls twice a week and once a month visits with my aunt or some one we agree on present because the last time he saw her was two years ago. I get a call this morning saying that he has changed his mind he doesn't want anyone there during his visits so he would rather have skype calls everyday and revisit the issue at the next mediation of him having unsupervised visits. I am not sure what I should do, everyday calls are doable I think but, after that I would still like for him to get to her more than just over the phone. He was adamant about not having someone there during a visit and I think he may think that if he has the skype calls for the next three months then he will ask for overnight visits. Any advice would be great I just want to do what is best for my child, he stopped calling over a year ago and would send a text every few months so she has not had any contact with him at all. He told the mediator that I have prevented him from visiting but that is not true, he wanted to just come and pick her up after not having seen her for 9 months i was fearful that he would just take her to his state and that was when I filed papers, all of this happened after he got child support paper work stating the amount he owed in back child support. In is answer to the petition he wanted 50/50 time after not having spent more than 3 hours alone with her in her whole life. If he is really serious about being in her life then I welcome that she need him especially after losing my fiance who she loved dearly.

 

[mightymoose]

Whatever your most recent court ordered visitation plan is, or mediation agreement, stick to it until there is a new one. If you deviate from the agreed plan you can potentially complicate things.
If he wants more visitation time, more phone calls, whatever, have it settled through your mediation first.
What happens otherwise is that the two of you will argue about agreements that you made between yourselves and promises that weren't kept, misunderstandings, etc., and there will be no remedy for it. You went through mediation for a reason. Stick to it and let the system work.

 

[tazzyboo202000]

There is no agreement because he doesn't want to sign what we originally agreed to in mediation. I was good with it and thought he was too. So I guess the next step is to go before a judge which is what I was trying to avoid by coming to an agreement in mediation.the father and I don't have any communication right now he sent his through the mediator.

 

[shrinkmaster]

You always want to work through courts! This way no involved party can cheat on agreements without consequences