Favortism in the workplace...

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KyAngel1975

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I have a question about workplace favortism. I work at a small retail business where there are salespeople and a secretary. I have been there about 9 years and the others 25 years or more, the secretary 8 years or so. Our work enviroment is horrible because the secretary loves to get all of the salespeople in trouble by going to our boss (the owner) and telling him all we do wrong... We have been watching the secretary steal for years, we told the owner and he would not believe us. After finding receipts that verify we were correct he put up security cameras. Would you believe the owner seen with his own eyes the secretary steal in front of the cameras and is still keeping her as an employee? Secretary was also coming to work intoxicated on pills so they did drug testing, the drug test came back bad on her, she even admitted to the owner it would and they countinue to keep her as a employee! We are sick of working around her and her assistant who is right now on leave for drug related issues (she didnt pass drug test either). I also am very resentful that the secretary gets double christmas bonus than me and I have been at this job longer than her and I do not steal off of him! When I had to leave on pregnancy leave and come back it wasnt said to me but for my punishment my Christmas bonus went from 500 a month to 200 and my schedule changed to only getting one day off one week and 2 the next alternating. I also made some financing mistakes at that time and he took all of it off my commision check without warning me, not even giving me a chance to make the payments back to him in increments. I cant believe I had to pay that back immediately but she can steal and get more christmas bonus then me, I feel she should be obligated to pay back at least what he has documented on receipts she has stolen! Sorry such a long post. Do I have any rights here?:mad:
 
Favoritism is not illegal unless it is based on a protected characteristic of yours (or hers) under Title VII or any state equivalent anti-discrimination laws.
 
He is probably having lots of illicit sexual relations and naughty sex with her. Therefore, he's NOT thinking with or using his correct head!
 
army judge said:
He is probably having lots of illicit sexual relations and naughty sex with her. Therefore, he's NOT thinking with or using his correct head!
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I appreciate dry wit... {correct head}, understated but a clever observation. :eek: kudos
 
emotions tied up in a job after all we spend lots of time there

KyAngel1975 said:
I know for a fact there is no sexual things going on.
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Well if he isn't thinking with his "wrong-head" then maybe she has something "on him". Maybe she knows something he wishes she didn't. Maybe he let her know something as they were friends and then she turned on him? Who knows?

How can you know for sure there's nothing sexual going on? (Not that its my business, but since you brought it up). I won't make any assumptions about how/why you know.

All I can say is that jealousy/rivalry (you might not like the word jealousy but it seems very likely) is a draining emotion. It keeps us in an unhappy frame of mind. With that in mind, if it were me, I would be looking for another job. Even if its for less money. Money, as they say, is not everything. There's no amount of money worth making yourself miserable for. As to possible jealousy/resentment, I confess I probably would be feeling it in your situation. It's a normal human emotion (imo) which isn't really wrong per se unless it causes the person who has it to act unwisely (saying or doing things you later regret).

Actually, I guess your tale resonates with me because i have been in a similar situation and I recall how draining it was and I began to feel diminished, like a child watching a parent giving preference to a sibling. My thoughts became immature, I think and I wasn't happy with myself for feeling that way. So on seeing nothing would change and feeling very unhappy, I did resign my position. It was the best thing for me. You have to decide for yourself what works for you. Just don't sell your happiness short.
 
Sexual

I know there isn't anything sexual going on because the owner goes to church and is married to a very beautiful woman. The secretary doesn't even bath like she should and is not pretty at all and she stinks most of the time. I know that sounds bad but its true. I guess it could be a possibility but very small. Thank you so much for your reply you hit it right on with the feelings and emotions we all feel. I am not the only one who feels this way, the other sales staff feel the same and it feels like we are mean step children or something. Thank u, so much for making me feel like I'm not a immature baby for feeling the way I do about this.
 
That's all fine and good and you have the right to feel however you want to feel.

However, this is a legal site for general legal information, and NOTHING you have posted indicates that any illegal discrimination is occuring.
 
KyAngel1975 said:
I know there isn't anything sexual going on because the owner goes to church and is married to a very beautiful woman. The secretary doesn't even bath like she should and is not pretty at all and she stinks most of the time. I know that sounds bad but its true. I guess it could be a possibility but very small. Thank you so much for your reply you hit it right on with the feelings and emotions we all feel. I am not the only one who feels this way, the other sales staff feel the same and it feels like we are mean step children or something. Thank u, so much for making me feel like I'm not a immature baby for feeling the way I do about this.
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He may feel sorry for her.
 
KyAngel1975 said:
I know there isn't anything sexual going on because the owner goes to church and is married to a very beautiful woman. The secretary doesn't even bath like she should and is not pretty at all and she stinks most of the time. I know that sounds bad but its true. I guess it could be a possibility but very small. Thank you so much for your reply you hit it right on with the feelings and emotions we all feel. I am not the only one who feels this way, the other sales staff feel the same and it feels like we are mean step children or something. Thank u, so much for making me feel like I'm not a immature baby for feeling the way I do about this.
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You are entirely welcome my dear. I'm glad I could relieve a bit of your emotional burden.

Like I said, I'm not an attorney so I can't give legal advice. I can say what worked and didn't work for me. And I can empathize with people. Realizing that your emotions are nothing so bad that you should now wear a scarlet letter or shamed for is a great relief isn't it? Legal matters and life can weigh us down. Nothing wrong with treating the whole person and I doubt the site monitors will begrudge you feeling better.

Weigh the pros and cons of leaving your current job and whatever the answer is be prepared to deal with it. have a plan. Whether its how to get a new job or how to change your attitude towards the secretary so it doesn't destroy your joie de vivre! It's a temporary bump in the road you can choose to go around or it will make an interesting anecdote in your memoirs!

Oh, and BTW, its been my observation that the fact someone is a church goer has little bearing on what they will or won't do other than what they do for the time period they go to services. Trust me!
 
KCGirl said:

Just like its legal for a mother to pay a visit to her child's recalcitrant employer.

Are you always this intensely focused? Try some deep-breathing exercises, they work miracles, Trust Me!
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I answer the questions that are asked, based on my over 30 years of experience.
 
KCGirl, when someone asks you to moderate the board, then you can chastise the responders all you want.

Until then, let those of us who have the word, Moderator, under their name, decide what is and is not appropriate. K?
 
I see nothing rude in Patricia's reply. I see a great deal of rudeness in yours.

As a relatively new member here, I think it is the height of rudeness for you to decide it's up to you to tell people off. Patricia was making an accurate legal point. She was not accusing the poster of anything, just explaining a concept.

You, on the other hand, decided to tear strips out of her for it.

One more time. The moderators are here to moderate. If any moderation of anyone's attitude is needed, we'll deal with it. You needn't trouble yourself.
 
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