Father wants to sign his rights over, I’m for it but how do we go about getting it done

[Momofaboy]

Jurisdiction

Virginia

My sons father and I have seen a mediator and came the agree of I have full physical custody but we both have joint legal custody... He is now saying he wants to sign his rights over and I'm so for it but how do we go about getting it done the right and legal way

 

[shrinkmaster]

You cant. If he chooses not to act like a Father thats up to him but courts wont allow him to release his rights (thus avoid child support etc) unless there is a willing Step Father to step in as Father

 

[adjusterjack]

He is now saying he wants to sign his rights over

So he won't have to pay child support.

You'd be an idiot to even consider it.

 

[Momofaboy]

So he won't have to pay child support.

You'd be an idiot to even consider it.

I don't want his money by any means

 

[shrinkmaster]

Not wanting means nothing and at some point you may NEED it. Regardless courts will NOT let him do this

 

[leslie82]

I don't want his money by any means

It doesn't matter if you want it or not. The court isn't going to let him relinquish his rights if there's not a stepparent to adopt. The courts are reluctant to do that because many want to avoid child support. The state doesn't want to take care of anyone's kids. So yeah - he better man up.

 

[ElleMD]

If you don't want the money, put it in an account for the child to receive at 18 or to pay for college. You created a child with this guy and both of you are bound to him for a minimum of 18 years.

 

[txls]

You have 18 (plus) years ahead of you. You cannot see into the future to know what will happen.
Even if you don't think you "need" the money, someday you might and it may allow your child opportunities that might not be otherwise affordable, such as college, travel etc. Not only that but he should not be allowed to walk away from his obligation and will go about telling others. Men need to know that they will be held accountable for their actions.

 

[zddoodah]

He is now saying he wants to sign his rights over and I'm so for it but how do we go about getting it done the right and legal way

Option 1: Find a person or couple willing to adopt your child, and then you both can consent to the adoption.

Option 2: Marry someone willing to adopt your child. After a year or two of being married, your new spouse can adopt the child with the father's consent.

Otherwise, there is no such thing as "signing over" one's parental rights, and I continue to be at a loss to understand why so many folks think such a thing exists.

 

[shrinkmaster]

Ok so his sperm is acceptable but not his money? You cannot do this so take the money to aid in raising child or do as suggested above. Thats if he even pays

 

[leslie82]

You can't waive child support in Virginia. Other states you can. Not yours. He isn't going to get his rights relinquished involuntarily or voluntarily so he's going to pay child support. If you don't need it put it an account for your kid until she's 18 and then give the kid the money.

Some NCP don't even pay. I could have waived child support with my ex husband. I didn't and he has barely paid anything in two years. I figured someday he has to pay it and then I give it to her if she's an adult. I doubt that will happen either.