Ex Filed Petition for Special Relief re: Summer Visitation and Phone Access

[Skippy75]

On Friday, right as I was leaving work, I received a Fax from my lawyer that my ex has filed a "Petition for Special Relief", and that I was due before a judge on Wednesday. Since this is a 3-day holiday weekend, that means there's only one time I can really meet with my lawyer before we actually go into court, so I'm trying to figure out exactly what I can do to help my case as much as possible before then.

The petition revolves around two issues...Summer Visitation and Phone Access. I'll start with phone access first, as it as been a frequent point of contestation between the two of us.

Ever since we got a new custody agreement that granted the Father "reasonable access" to his children via telephone, his lawyer has threatened to file a motion for contempt every third month or so. In the petition, the things the Father is requesting seem outlandish.

First and foremost, he's requesting that I, the Mother become responsible for having the children call him, every single day, at a set time. The Father claims that he is incurring massive expenses from having to call long distance all the time and that I am not providing reasonable access. He also believes I should have to prove that I am actually having the children call him.

This part has me gobsmacked. Is there any kind of precedence for things like this? Is there any way I myself can prepare evidence to stop such a petition from getting passed? I've gotten a cellphone for the children that is only used for the Father to contact them, and they've been using it for a couple months now. I've printed out a record of phone calls, and highlighting all calls longer than 1 minute that came from/went to his house phone/cell phone, while also preparing a calendar to show which days correspond to which calls. So far, I'm maintaining a 90% daily communication rate between his children and him. Is this not "reasonable access"?


Second in the petition is Summer Visitation. In the first custody agreement, he was granted every-other weekend. It was later modified so that he also gets every-other holiday and one week (7 days) for each summer month (June, July, August). According to my lawyer, the one week thing supercedes the every-other-week thing, however in his petition he's asking for both. This troubles me, as he takes his one week such that I only ever get one weekend per summer month to have trips and whatnot with my children.

I've tried coming to some agreement with him, such that he would have 11 days each summer month with the children (while I get two weekends with them), but his lawyer has long-since told him to not communicate with me. He's taken that so literally that he never told me that he'd be leaving the state with the children for an extended period of time (a fact which I'm sure will help my case). What are my options here?

Sorry this is a little verbose, but I'd greatly appreciate any help.

 

[army judge]

Come on, this is easy if you both give a little.

It is wise NOT to talk to each other.

That is why you hire lawyers to avoid arguments and disagreements.

The call is easy.
Get another cell phone and let the kids use it to call dad.
Most plans have unlimited long distance and allow you to call other cell phones on the same network for free.
An additional line on a family plan costs less than $10/month. Problem solved. Then you let the kids use the phone under your supervision.

Summer schedule is easier.

Why not let dad have the kids for 30 days (1 month) consecutively?

Let dad choose the 30 days.

You may not like each other, but you both love your kids.

Show them that you'll do anything to make them happy.

Tell your lawyer to work it out with dad's lawyer.

Give a little, even a lot for the welfare of your kids.

None of this is worth arguing about.

Dad is being a jerk.

Don't buy into his madness, give in for your kids.


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[Skippy75]

The call is easy.
Get another cell phone and let the kids use it to call dad.
Most plans have unlimited long distance and allow you to call other cell phones on the same network for free.
An additional line on a family plan costs less than $10/month. Problem solved. Then you let the kids use the phone under your supervision.

The children are currently seven and nine. They already have a cell phone that the Father is instructed to call for his daily phone call. As is, I usually have to force them to carry the phone with them and answer the phone. Last time this issue was brought up formally, the mediator said I should force the children to answer the phone, as "children don't always know what's best for them." If it was up to the Children to call the Father and/or answer phone calls from him of their own free will, they wouldn't...at least not with a frequency acceptable to the Father.

 

[irish223]

One can never say how a judge will rule. IMO, you've done quite a bit to make sure the dad has reasonable phone access, and your printout of the calls shows that.

I agree that a daily call at a given time is unreasonable. If your kids are involved in any sports or other activities, you might want to take their schedules of games, recitals, practices, or whatever to show how difficult it will be to coordinate a phone call at a given time every day.

Or, if it does come down to that, request a time that you know you'll have your children captive; ie, in the car on the way to or from the sitter or daycare.

For the summer, if you're willing to offer him 2 weeks every month, with each week beginning on the first day of his weekend visitation, it would show that you're willing to compromise, and it would preserve your weekends. Or, you can ask to have the current order amended to say that his 7 days may not affect your weekends.

Good Luck!

 

[army judge]

The children are currently seven and nine. They already have a cell phone that the Father is instructed to call for his daily phone call. As is, I usually have to force them to carry the phone with them and answer the phone. Last time this issue was brought up formally, the mediator said I should force the children to answer the phone, as "children don't always know what's best for them." If it was up to the Children to call the Father and/or answer phone calls from him of their own free will, they wouldn't...at least not with a frequency acceptable to the Father.

Oh, well, it was just a suggestion.

I hope everything works out for all of you.

Everyone should be as happy as they try to be.





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