Michelle_B
New Member
My ex and I divorced 7 years ago when my daughter was 3. In the divorce, I was granted primary custody and our parenting plan pretty much reflected standard visitation for my ex. Shortly after our divorce my ex married the woman he left me for and they have been together ever since. Over the past 7 years I have dealt with my ex and his wife disecting my entire life. They have accused me of neglecting my child. They have told my daughter things and made her promise not to tell me (ie her stepmother called me a curse word and made my daughter pinky swear not to tell) They have called Child protective services on me...made false accusations. They refuse to take part in my daughters activities and have told her that it interferes with their family time. I cant even begin to type all the scenerios that i have been through over the past 7 years. I think the worst was in 2004 when I found out i was pregnant and not only did they bad mouth me for having a child out of wedlock but they told my daughter if the child was not white (and she wasnt) that they were going to make her come live with them because it was wrong to have an interracial relationship/child. I have spent many days trying to pick up the pieces of their lies and hatred. My daughter has alot of resentment toward them because she knows their lies. SHe has struggled for years about going to visit with them but she is fearful of hurting her dad so she goes to please him. She really doesnt mind at all when she doesnt have to go. In fact she gets excited when she doesnt have to go visit.....shes even asked me if she could lie and say shes sick....(i wont let her.)
I remarried in 2006 and after 8 months of being married my ex filed for full custody of our daughter. His main reason was he claimed I had given our daughter to my parents....this simply is because he is jelaous that i have a close relationship with my parents....they keep my daughter after school until i get home from work. He felt its not fair that her grandparents see her everyday and he did not...so once again he made up lies about me and my husband to try and take custody. My daughter was appointed a guardian ad litem through the courts. the guardian talked with my daughter and the resolution was that we modified the visitaion where he sees her a little more. The Guardian also made it clear to my ex that it is vital he use visitaion time to visit with his child...apparently that was one of the things my daughter told the guardian...(my daughter wanted more one on one time with dad and not so much with stepmom). The guardian also pointed out that based on my ex's income, my child support should double....so she ordered a support modification. AT this point, he became very angry and for the past two months he has been saying he wants to give up his rights totally. he called every other day wanting to know if my new husband would be willing to adopt her. I made it very clear that I knew he was doing this because of money but he insisted that it was because he didnt love my daughter like his other children and he didnt feel a bond with her and he rather her be with family that loves her. He did not pick her up for visitation for two months. I made excuses to my daughter and told her he was out of town or he was going to let her stay home for a carnival (i said whatever to make the situation easy).
I guess he has now realized that he cant just sign her off to get rid of his financial responsibility so he called this week to tell me that he was going to start exercising his visitaion rights again...i asked him why he would want to see her if he didnt love her and NOW he says it just that he doesnt want her to grow up with the opinion that he was a bad father!!!!.....So he picked her up for their tuesday night visit and this morning my daughter called me when they dropped her off at the sitters (shes 10...schools out for holiday)...to tell me her stepmom told her they havent been pickng her up because Im mean to her dad and it is making him stressed out.
IS THERE ANYTHING THAT CAN BE DONE TO STOP THIS MADNESS!!!....its constant.
I remarried in 2006 and after 8 months of being married my ex filed for full custody of our daughter. His main reason was he claimed I had given our daughter to my parents....this simply is because he is jelaous that i have a close relationship with my parents....they keep my daughter after school until i get home from work. He felt its not fair that her grandparents see her everyday and he did not...so once again he made up lies about me and my husband to try and take custody. My daughter was appointed a guardian ad litem through the courts. the guardian talked with my daughter and the resolution was that we modified the visitaion where he sees her a little more. The Guardian also made it clear to my ex that it is vital he use visitaion time to visit with his child...apparently that was one of the things my daughter told the guardian...(my daughter wanted more one on one time with dad and not so much with stepmom). The guardian also pointed out that based on my ex's income, my child support should double....so she ordered a support modification. AT this point, he became very angry and for the past two months he has been saying he wants to give up his rights totally. he called every other day wanting to know if my new husband would be willing to adopt her. I made it very clear that I knew he was doing this because of money but he insisted that it was because he didnt love my daughter like his other children and he didnt feel a bond with her and he rather her be with family that loves her. He did not pick her up for visitation for two months. I made excuses to my daughter and told her he was out of town or he was going to let her stay home for a carnival (i said whatever to make the situation easy).
I guess he has now realized that he cant just sign her off to get rid of his financial responsibility so he called this week to tell me that he was going to start exercising his visitaion rights again...i asked him why he would want to see her if he didnt love her and NOW he says it just that he doesnt want her to grow up with the opinion that he was a bad father!!!!.....So he picked her up for their tuesday night visit and this morning my daughter called me when they dropped her off at the sitters (shes 10...schools out for holiday)...to tell me her stepmom told her they havent been pickng her up because Im mean to her dad and it is making him stressed out.
IS THERE ANYTHING THAT CAN BE DONE TO STOP THIS MADNESS!!!....its constant.
