Dividing up the money

[TinaTina]

My Mom recently passed away and my brother, sister and I will be recieving her retirement pention soon. I'm pretty sure I'm her beneficiary so I will be the one responsible for dividing it up. My brother and I agree to split it up 3 ways. My sister however thinks we should include her 2 kids and her grandchild - and not my step-son. (her 23 year old son lived with my Mom and somewhat watched over her but only paid 200 a month rent) So she thinks he needs to be included one way or the other mostly for that reason. What is fair here? I'm so confused and don't know what to do. I dont want to fight with anyone. Can you please tell me which is the proper way? If I'm the beneficiary can I tell the company I don't want to be and to just divide it up however they would automatically?

 

[lwpat]

There are a lot of facts left out of your post that make it difficult to give you an answer. In addition I am not an expert on estate law or even an attorney but I will give it a shot.

I am assuming that the money will go straight to you and not be included in the estate. Basically the money is yours to do with as you please and you do not have to share with anyone.
Even if you try to be fair it is not going to work for your greedy sister unless you were to give it all to her.

My opinion is that what you and your brother have decided is fair. Why should she be rewarded with extra shares just for having children?

You need to check with your tax adviser before doing anything since there could be some tax consequences of giving the money to them.

If you refuse the money it could either go into the estate and have to be probated and divided according to the laws of your state or it could be listed as unclaimed funds and eventually go to the government. Without more information I don't know which way it would be treated. The fund manager should be able to give you some guidance so give them a call.

 

[freebird]

The difficulties of being an executor (all of you who receive property would be "beneficiaries" of the estate.) If your mother died without a will (intestate) the estate would be divided in the manner set forth by your state law. It is set. I think that in most jurisdictions the children would get equal shares, divided in three ways in your case (all to the "Issue" when there is no "Surviving Spouse" to be distributed "by Representation.")

From a personal standpoint, I would think it fair that the estate be divided equally amongst your mother's children. What if you had 37 children and grandchildren in total? Would your sister think it fair that she and her children get a fraction of the estate? Of course not. It would seem that each of you gets an equal share to decide how to distribute. Would it be "nice" to give the natural grandchildren some of the money? Perhaps, maybe some of the heirlooms. It is difficult to distribute differently and that is why a will should be used when possible. Keeps the peace.

In this instance, state law is the law and may make your life easier.

Originally posted by TinaTina
My Mom recently passed away and my brother, sister and I will be recieving her retirement pention soon. I'm pretty sure I'm her beneficiary so I will be the one responsible for dividing it up. My brother and I agree to split it up 3 ways. My sister however thinks we should include her 2 kids and her grandchild - and not my step-son. (her 23 year old son lived with my Mom and somewhat watched over her but only paid 200 a month rent) So she thinks he needs to be included one way or the other mostly for that reason. What is fair here? I'm so confused and don't know what to do. I dont want to fight with anyone. Can you please tell me which is the proper way? If I'm the beneficiary can I tell the company I don't want to be and to just divide it up however they would automatically?