Defamation resulting in longterm loss

[seekinganswers]

Many years ago, something false was told about me. It was used to bring harmful people into my life and also encouraged outright crooks to get involved. Someone near and dear to me was also harassed and sustained great losses based on lies and abuse. That person died some years back from the effects of their loss and an inability to get sustained legal help.

Jump forward to now: I am still trying to deal with the situation with no luck. The lie is thrown into my face every once in a while, and it is on records about me and has helped to keep me from earning a living. The lie has been used many times as an excuse to involve abusive family members in my life.
I am also literally sick from the situation.

What do I do, how do I clear my name, and how do I get a handle on what happened? I also know of some other name being tied to mine on public records with some connection to my original problem. Since it is not a name I have ever used, how do I find out what mischief it has caused and how it got tied to me in the first place?

 

[dee_dub]

This is all very cryptic. If you don't want certain people involved in your life, tell them to pound sand. But without knowing how your name is sullied, it is impossible to say how you could clear it. Asking the custodians of whatever records are at issue would probably be a good starting point.

 

[seekinganswers]

This is all very cryptic. If you don't want certain people involved in your life, tell them to pound sand. But without knowing how your name is sullied, it is impossible to say how you could clear it. Asking the custodians of whatever records are at issue would probably be a good starting point.

Dee, I'm sorry if it sounds cryptic. I'm not sure how to write to make my point most effectively in this situation, so please bear with me. As for those "certain people," if it was that simple, it would have been done years ago. In fact, it was tried to no avail many times.

As for "how" my name is sullied, I can say that it was somehow said years ago that I am mentally disabled. Not formally, at least that I know of, but informally. That was the first time I had ever even heard of even the idea. I am not, in fact I'm in the other direction. It has been used as an excuse to control me and otherwise abuse me. I lost a lot in many ways because of that. There's a lot more to the story than I can post here. My post is one aspect of the situation.

I've tried to pin down the origins of the lie, but to no avail so far. That lie has cost me a lot, including a life.

 

[dee_dub]

Based on your story so far, it is difficult to identify what legal issues you might have. It is not clear to me whether or how anyone is controlling you. No-one has the right to control you (generally speaking) without a court order or something similar. If someone is trying to and you don't want them to, it is up to you to tell them to butt out.

 

[seekinganswers]

Based on your story so far, it is difficult to identify what legal issues you might have. It is not clear to me whether or how anyone is controlling you. No-one has the right to control you (generally speaking) without a court order or something similar. If someone is trying to and you don't want them to, it is up to you to tell them to butt out.

Dee, my story has a lot of facets to it. I mentioned the one area in order to give it a "hook." As for controlling me, it was done. It's not so much directly now, mainly me suffering from the effects of the control and knowing that the alleged disability is on file about me. I've been told about it, but I'm not told how to do something about it. It is absolutely defamation. I've suffered a lot in tangible ways as well. It is a buildup of things.

I've told people to butt out, but to no avail. There are family, civil liberties, fraud, and other issues as well.

 

[dee_dub]

It's still very cryptic. How you can know it's "on file" but have no way of finding out what file? You've been told - by whom? How is simply having an allegation "on file" harmful to you, especially if you don't know where it is?

 

[seekinganswers]

Dee, I'm not going to post "who" on here. I know how it has harmed me, I do know where it is on file in several places. I'm not going to post where. I will say that the situation started as a bullying, lying neighbor, his shrewish wife, and their lies. The lie about me was the lever they needed to get an abusive relative into my life. He made me look like a monster in other ways as well. Another two people died because of them, from the abuse.

I don't know how to answer you, and I am not going to go into a lot of detail on a public forum such as this. It did happen, and no amount of telling me to tell people to get lost will change the fact that I did and they didn't.

 

[dee_dub]

All right. Good luck to you then.

 

[seekinganswers]

Dee, I have tried to stop certain people, but have been unsuccessful. I know about the lie being on file somewhere because I have been told by someone who is in the civil service(employment bureau) that it was on file there. I have also been mocked over it, and they didn't do it on paper. The abusive relative could not contain his glee at the lie.

People do not want to get involved enough to help me do something, and people do not always do what they are supposed to do, but you already know that. The lie was used as an excuse to bring abusive people into my life. It was used to ignore me completely and to call in an abusive relative who has lied about me to judges on paper and off. This relative has also lied about me to many people, including TV reporters(I know when and where) who did a story involving me where the relative blamed me for things he caused/did himself. He made me look very bad, and no one would help me. People just don't want to get involved.

It's a long story, and since you are bowing out I won't go into it any further.

 

[dee_dub]

Actually, if you would go into it, I would be less inclined to bow out. Throw us a bone here. We don't read minds.

 

[seekinganswers]

Okay, I'll try again. Let me think on it. Any particular questions? If you tell me to tell certain people to butt out, I will tell you again that I did try, but they would not listen and no one would stop them.

 

[seekinganswers]

Hello? Dee, what do you want to know?

 

[FlaRiptide]

and knowing that the alleged disability is on file about me. I've been told about it, but I'm not told how to do something about it. It is absolutely defamation.

If it is alleged and believed to be true, then it is not defamation.

The lie was used as an excuse to bring abusive people into my life. It was used to ignore me completely and to call in an abusive relative who has lied about me to judges on paper and off.

How have you been legally damaged?

This relative has also lied about me to many people, including TV reporters(I know when and where) who did a story involving me where the relative blamed me for things he caused/did himself.

The relative may not think it is a lie, he or she may actually believe it, so it is not defamation. And again, how has this alleged defamation caused you harm? Monetarily, physically, etc.?

I have empathy for you since I have my own drawn out story. I know how hard it is to exlpain when the circumstances are so bizarre and intertwined.

You need to segregate your circumstances and ask one question at a time and provide detail. No one can help you if you force us to guess at what is really going on.

 

[seekinganswers]

If it is alleged and believed to be true, then it is not defamation.

How have you been legally damaged?

The relative may not think it is a lie, he or she may actually believe it, so it is not defamation. And again, how has this alleged defamation caused you harm? Monetarily, physically, etc.?

I have empathy for you since I have my own drawn out story. I know how hard it is to exlpain when the circumstances are so bizarre and intertwined.

You need to segregate your circumstances and ask one question at a time and provide detail. No one can help you if you force us to guess at what is really going on.

It came up somehow after some problems had already started. Are you saying that a lie can be told about someone, it can fester for years ruining a person's life, and they can't do anything about it because it is "believed to be true?" Suppose that lie is used as an excuse to control and abuse someone? Perhaps it is spread in order to defame the person and to keep them from doing anything about the situation. I was never found to be disabled, that was the first I'd heard of it. I don't believe someone can just lie about a person and then keep using that lie as an excuse to abuse them on a long-term basis.

Life ruined, physically, financially, and other ways damaged.


The relative knew it was not true, he even mocked me about it. He rubbed in my face that I'm actually very intelligent contrasting with the lie told about me. He was brought into it after it had started and he took advantage of the situation. He is a violent abuser and an opportunist. I'm not the only one he's done things to.

Yes, it is drawn out. It is very hard to try and take one small strand out of the whole skein and to dwell on that.

Could you please tell me how to do what you say in the last paragraph? Thank you.

 

[dee_dub]

I don't particularly want to know anything. The information that would be helpful if you seek assistance is, for starters: who said what to whom, why did they say it, who has records of it, how are those records being used and by whom, who is controlling you, how are they doing so, under what legal authority if any do they claim the right to control you, how did all of this damage you?

 

[seekinganswers]

I don't particularly want to know anything. The information that would be helpful if you seek assistance is, for starters: who said what to whom, why did they say it, who has records of it, how are those records being used and by whom, who is controlling you, how are they doing so, under what legal authority if any do they claim the right to control you, how did all of this damage you?

Okay, Dee. I'll see what I can do. FlaRiptide is correct, when you have a complicated situation, it is very hard to separate each strand of the story. Perhaps something you leave out in the telling is something that is actually pertinent on a legal basis, for example.

I can say that when I have tried to find out the origin of the lie I have been rebuffed quite a bit.