Deadbeat dad, terminating his rights

[Mom2Girls]

I need advice. I intend to seek an attorney if necessary but right now I am just seeking sound advice.

My daughter's father is nearly $4,000 in the arrears. He goes months without even calling my child. The last time he called our daughter was in March 2007. Before that even longer. I am so tired of his lack of financial and emotional support for our child I just rather be rid of him and she can contact him or try to find him when she is 18.

He almost went to jail for being in the arrears but his month bailed him out and paid some of the back support for him (this was in Jan 2007). From April 2006 to Jan 2007 I got NOTHING from him.

He is on her birth certificate and I wish I had never allowed him to get on the darn thing. (he signed affidavit of parentage and we went to the vital records place and had him out on her certificate when she was 2 or 3 years old (she is now 8 almost 9 years old).

I am engaged to be married and my new hubby wants to adopt my daughter. She has my last name. The thing is as deadbeat as her bio dad is I KNOW he will always stand in the way and never sign over his rights without the proper "pressure" so to speak.

How much in the arrears can he go before they try to lock him up again. I call the child support enforcement office every few weeks, they send letters and take his taxes but that only happens once a year. (I received $600 in June from his taxes so I think they will count that as a payment from him but when you look at the track record he has not paid a dime from his own pocket since April of 2006. How long can he go w/o calling and how high can his arrears climb before his rights can be terminated? Does it count if I or I let her call him as HE maintaining contact?

What is the best and fastest way to get his rights revoked? Seems to me he can't possibly be seen as a father being deprived when he does nothing to communicate with our daughter.

Also he lives in Texas and I live in Maryland. I have seen posts about people not being able to move. I am the primary custodian and he has 'reasonable visitation' per the court papers in 2000. We never went before a judge but settled custody and child support in 'mediation' at the courts. Would I seriously need his permission to move or get a passport for my daughter when we go on our family cruise next year? He talks to her 3 or 4 times a year if that- it would kill me to know I needed his permission for that!

 

[Mom2Girls]

no one has any advice or info to share?

 

[calalily]

It doesn't matter how deadbeat a dad he is you can't terminate his rights without his permission. It should state in your divorce order whether or not you need his permission to move. I don't think you need permission to go on a trip though. Duranie will probably answer later; she is more of an expert in this field, so check back from time to time to see if there are other responses. Each states varies as to how much in arrears happens before they lock him up again...just keep reporting him. Ask about garnishment of wages...don't know if Texas allows that for child support...google Texas choild support laws and see.

 

[Duranie]

You cannot terminate without his permission. If he pays sporadic support and talks to the child every few months then that is considered contact.

TOR should only be done if its in the childs best interest. You can only do this if you are married and your husband wishes to adopt. I would worry about this atfer you get married then see an adoption attorney.

Dad can still fight the move. If he is not very involved in the child's life and does not pay support and you can prove the move is in the childs best interest, you might be able too.

 

[Mom2Girls]

First, thank you very much for the comments.

We were never married. When I took him to court for child support we went to mediation and it was decided that I am the custodial parent and he has reasonable visitation (exact wording), nothing at all about if I could move or not. Does that stipulation only apply to formerly married parents?

I guess it depends on the state. There is some kind of deadbeat dad act (at least in MD where I live) where after a certain period of time with no contact and no support the father's rights can be terminated, I just don't know the details and what circumstances have to be in place.

I have been through the ringer with this...it took almost a year for them (child support enforcement) to threaten him with jail (his mom paid on his arrears to save him) so now I feel like we have to go another 7, 8 months before any real enforcement is done. Which really makes me angry because if I just decided that "I didn't have it" and ignored and stopped taking care of my child, the courts, society and everyone else would be first in line to call me unfit...but a 'father' does the same and he gets 10000001 chances to do right before anything is done....Shame.

But thanks again for the input. We will definitely look into trying to adopt her (my fiance') Let her natural father dig his own hole, when another year goes by with rare contact and no child support a judge will be more inclined to see that her best interest is to have an active father figure and not a deadbeat.:no:

 

[RR37]

I located this page from a Google search, which is written by an MD lawyer with 25 years experience and answers your question of termination directly:
http://www.childcustody.net/45.html

As for moving, since you already live in different states it will probably not be as difficult as if you lived in the same state. If he does not visit your child and the move is for a vital reason like work, school, or a better living environment, the judge will most likely approve it. However, there could possibly be some type of support deduction for the difference in cost for visitation. Although, I personally don't see this happening if he doesn't visit to begin with or pay support as is! You never know though and I just wanted to throw it out there for thought.

In regards to a passport and vacations, you just need sole custody without any language restricting travel in your orders.

Note: Definition of "sole custody" from Google: "An arrangement whereby only one parent has physical and legal custody of a child and the other parent has visitation rights."

Federal Guidelines for Passports: http://travel.state.gov/passport/get/minors/minors_834.html

Good luck and hope that helps.