Dad wants stable life for son

[Tpain]

I am recently divorced and my ex wife had custody of our 5 year old. Living with her are her new husband, his friend, an adopted son, my nephew, and my son. She is constantly moving causing instability in his life. His teachers are noting bad behavior and he had discipline problems at home. Recently my ex wife and her whole crew have moved back into her mother's house with her mother and step father and my brother into a 4 bedroom rental house. My ex wife does not work and her new husband has since lost his job. I am A Retail sales manager at PepBoys and have my own apartment. There have also been many times when my ex has threatened to take my son away from me. She says he's out of control and can't handle him but when I offer changing custody she doesn't go for it. HOnestly i believe it's becasue of the check that comes every 2 weeks becasue that is her only contribution to her new family. I feel that I could offer more discipline, devotion and stability to my son's life. Do I have a custody case? Also not sure about legal fee,s if I can afford them

 

[jen197954965]

I know what you are going through. My ex wife turned into a beast after our divorce. She is completely throwing her life away and taking our children with her. We have 50/50 placement and custody but she makes their lives and mine a living h e l l. She has tried so many times to brain wash our children and they are basically afraid of her. In the last two year I have been put through watching my children live with her in horrid conditions with numerous people just like you. The only advice I can tell you if what I have done which has worked so far successfully. I document EVERYTHING! Its sad but in the last year and a half went I started keeping a journal I have over 175 typed pages. I took her for a loop and requested mediation. She didn't like that at all. Read up on the topic as much as you can. There is really great websites for divorced dads support. I am in know way a person that just supports divorced dads only. I have met alot of women with dead beat ex hubands too. If you do end up taking her to mediation explain that you would like to change custody arrangments and bring your case with you. She will try every trick in the book, mine did. My ex lied through our entire mediation. But I had that big journal to back up everything I had to say. She couldn't back track on her words. If mediation fails the court will likely appoint a guardian to represent your child. Then that is where you prove that you are the responsible parent that has the willing to care for your child's best interests. My last piece of advice is DON'T GIVE UP!!!

 

[chrstnsln22]

I am a mother of a beautiful one year old girl. My marriage is great and don't have any prob with my husband. But as a parent, I should say that you should do what needs to be done. And that is making sure that your son is in good hands. Make sure that your son is bein taken care of. If you think that you are more capable than that, then I think you should fight for it.



Christine

 

[luvstexas]

I am recently divorced and my ex wife had custody of our 5 year old. Living with her are her new husband, his friend, an adopted son, my nephew, and my son. She is constantly moving causing instability in his life. His teachers are noting bad behavior and he had discipline problems at home. Recently my ex wife and her whole crew have moved back into her mother's house with her mother and step father and my brother into a 4 bedroom rental house. My ex wife does not work and her new husband has since lost his job. I am A Retail sales manager at PepBoys and have my own apartment. There have also been many times when my ex has threatened to take my son away from me. She says he's out of control and can't handle him but when I offer changing custody she doesn't go for it. HOnestly i believe it's becasue of the check that comes every 2 weeks becasue that is her only contribution to her new family. I feel that I could offer more discipline, devotion and stability to my son's life. Do I have a custody case? Also not sure about legal fee,s if I can afford them

Have you spoken to your child's teachers? Have you tried taking him to counseling? Are you exercising 100% of your visitaition? For a custody change, you are going to need a substantial change in circumstance. Unfortunately, he said/she said will not work in front of a judge and moving around a lot doesn't hold weight either.
check up at your child's school...get more information about the issues the teachers are bringing up, check on absences, tardies. do you know the people she's living with? Anyone with a criminal background? Check on up that too.
Counseling would really help you child cope with the divorce and time split between you and his mother. Keep thorough documentation as someone else mentioned...this helped me when I gained custody of my son.