1111111111
New Member
- Jurisdiction
- California
Deletion requested by OP.
custody, visitation
- Thread Starter 1111111111
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PayrollHRGuy
Well-Known Member
First you need to stop all this "I" and "we" crap. You don't have a legal dog in this fight. Hell, you aren't even the husband of the mother in all of this.
The best thing you can do is help your girlfriend find a could family law attorney.
The best thing you can do is help your girlfriend find a could family law attorney.
zddoodah
Well-Known Member
Your girlfriend's son with another man is neither "our son" nor your step-son.
It's not clear what "all of this" might mean.
It sounds as though there is a court order regarding custody, visitation and support. Correct? However, it also sounds like the father has no involvement with the child (i.e., doesn't exercise his visitation rights) and doesn't not pay child support. Also correct?
Like it or not, this is the guy your girlfriend chose to have a child with, and he has parental rights until and unless a court says otherwise. Under the circumstances, the only way to get his rights terminated would be if you step up and marry the mother and seek to adopt the child. If dad remains a non-entity in the child's life, then you might be able to get dad's rights terminated so that you can adopt. Note that getting married isn't an absolute necessity, but judges may be disinclined to allow an adoption unless you do that.
I suggest you and your girlfriend consult with a local family law attorney for advice.
It's not clear what "all of this" might mean.
It sounds as though there is a court order regarding custody, visitation and support. Correct? However, it also sounds like the father has no involvement with the child (i.e., doesn't exercise his visitation rights) and doesn't not pay child support. Also correct?
Like it or not, this is the guy your girlfriend chose to have a child with, and he has parental rights until and unless a court says otherwise. Under the circumstances, the only way to get his rights terminated would be if you step up and marry the mother and seek to adopt the child. If dad remains a non-entity in the child's life, then you might be able to get dad's rights terminated so that you can adopt. Note that getting married isn't an absolute necessity, but judges may be disinclined to allow an adoption unless you do that.
I suggest you and your girlfriend consult with a local family law attorney for advice.
The child is not your son...or even your step-child. Did your girlfriend get permission from the courts to move her child away from his father?
In order to 'erase" dad from the picture, you will have to marry your gf and go for a step parent adoption. Please note that it is very difficult to get a parents rights terminated without their consent.
In order to 'erase" dad from the picture, you will have to marry your gf and go for a step parent adoption. Please note that it is very difficult to get a parents rights terminated without their consent.
army judge
Super Moderator
If I solicited advice regarding this issue, I would be very happy that you gave me sound, solid advice.
Thank you for helping the "mythical me".
1111111111
New Member
Thanks for the info back, I understand he is not yet legally my step child, my girlfriend and I are domestic partners though, dont know if this helps anything.
I guess what Im looking for is where it goes from here? cant reach the guy, hired private investigators and process servers and still can not get a hold of him to give him the court move away orders.
also him not paying child support for 5 years cant help us at all in this fight??
I guess what Im looking for is where it goes from here? cant reach the guy, hired private investigators and process servers and still can not get a hold of him to give him the court move away orders.
also him not paying child support for 5 years cant help us at all in this fight??
Zigner
Well-Known Member
Repeat after me:
There is no US in this matter.
There is no US in this matter.
shrinkmaster
Well-Known Member
As you have been told there is no "we" in this and this is NOT your son nor your family! Your GF (not you) needs to consult with an Attorney to discuss what legal actions are required to resolve issue. If you want this to be a "family" then put a ring on your GF. You have no legal rights nor are you even legally involved. In fact if Dad wants he could take issue with you and you being near his child! If Dad has visitation and you move Mom away your GF will likely have to pay for travel expenses for visits since she created the distance. You cannot just move and take away his rights even if he is a lackluster Dad.
zddoodah
Well-Known Member
Prior to January 1, 2020, California law did not legally recognize "domestic partnerships" between heterosexual couples. Did you and your "girlfriend," in the four months since January 1, 2020, file a Declaration of Domestic Partnership with the California Secretary of State? See Cal. Fam. Code section 297, et seq. If the answer is no, then your statement that you and she "are domestic partners" is legally meaningless.
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