biologica

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greekgirl504

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biological father- does he have rights?I need to change my babys name.

My baby's "father" pays child support, but he doesn't visit.He is only concerned about himself, not my baby.She's allmost two. He has only been paying CS for about three months.(allthough he was suppose to be paying way before that.) He is currently on probation.I don't know if his name is on the birth certificate. - He did not sign it at the hospital but, the CS people told me that they would add his name. . . that confused me.He has never filed for any thing and I don't understand if he has any rights or custody.My husband has been the "male rolemodel" in her life.He was there for lamaz,labor and childbirth-up to now.. . . he wants to adopt her, but the "father" will not sign his rights to me...The most important thing to me is that my baby doesn't grow up feeling like she's not enough or alone.I want to change her last name so she will have the same name as me, my husband and future children we may have. I don't want her to feel "different" what can I do to change her name?PLEASE ANSWER ANY OF THE ABOVE QUESTIONS YOU CAN. . I am so upset about this.
 
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Your daughter's father will have visitation/custody rights if he ever files for them. If not, he has none.

He does have the right to retain his parental rights, to contest the step-parent adoption, and to prevent you from changing his daughter's name.

If he stops paying the support, and attempts no contact with the child for the amount of time specified in your state's guidelines, then you can petition the court for termination of parental rights so your husband can adopt. Even then, it will probably be a long process, since the father will still have the right to participate in the hearing and contest the termination.
 
Be prepared document everything, expenses, for medical, clothes, extra curricular activities label and put it away incase.

If ex does choose to be apart embrace it and make sure to fight fearsly for provision in your order to give you custody and limit ex's visitation. Hopefully ex turns around and becomes productive and true to your daughter

Speaking from experience, you can run but you can't hide. Be honest with your child when she comes of age if ex does not choose to be apart. Never speak badly about ex just honestly and so very truthfully. If you don't know the answers to her questions it is O.K. to say so.

I say this because all too often kids find out they are adopted and the very thing you are now trying to protect her from becomes her reality and you will often be the person she blames. Of course only until she is old enough to be a parent.

Just a mom….
 
thanks

Thanks for your input and advice. I don't intend to lie to her or try to cover up the truth.I just don't want her to have a different last name then the rest of the family.I was adopted myself and I know how important it is to feel like you fit in.A different last name would not be good.. . . I have always told him/his family that they can visit and even taken her to see them.They have only came twice.He has came once.I want the best for her, she has found a dad in my husband and that's all she knows, I just want it to be official.
 
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