Bashed the judge, what now?

[3timeDad]

My ex wife and I have been to court 3 times over custody and parenting time. Currently she has custody and has the children 60% of the time. Each and every time before we went to court, I made her an offer that she declined, only for her to be worse off than my offer after the judge ruled. She's the most unreasonable person I've ever known and is painfully stupid. So that's what I'm dealing with.

I'm worried my ex wife will soon take me to court to try and reduce my parenting time. I've not done anything worth reporting to my children to warrant any loss of parenting time. I'd say so if I did. So there's no issue there. But I believe she may be trying to capitalize on things I've written to her about our judge. On a few cocktail filled, Friday night dinners soon after I had recently discovered she'd been completely trashing me to our children, I wrote her a piece of my mind. And it wasn't pretty. And within those emails are paragraphs where I completely trash our judge.

Our judge is a far left radical socialist in Portland, OR who gives custody to the women 100% and has fleeced me for way over what the support calculator recommends, as well as hammering me in the divorce. She's not totally shut me out of the kids lives; I have 40% visitation time, but that's only because I'm an obviously good father and even the judge can see that.

Some will disagree with me and that's fine, but I said some jerkish things in the email about the fact she's a lesbian with no kids and she's trying to judge parents, yet has none of the parental instincts you get when you parent your own child. I said she shouldn't be allowed to judge and she's more of an activist than someone interested in what's best for the kids.

So yeah, that's brutal I know. So assuming my wife tries to use this in court, how screwed am I? That's basically my question. Please, to anyone reading this, don't waste time judging what I said to her. I'm not interested in debating that with anyone. I'm just trying to understand the potential consequences of what I wrote in the email. Thanks.

 

[Tax Counsel]

So assuming my wife tries to use this in court, how screwed am I?

Clearly attacking the judge with kind of idiotic statements you apparently made does not help you if the judge sees it. It may well hurt you. When someone has the power to make significant decisions that affect your life, the smart thing is not to tick that person. Not knowing this judge or anything about your case, I can't speculate how badly you may have hurt yourself. But you made yourself look at least petty and irrational from the sound of it, which will diminish your credibility that with judge.

By the way, one doesn't have to be a parent, or straight, to be a good family law judge. Indeed, sometimes judges who aren't parents can be more objective than judges who are. It is not unusual that one side or the other in a custody or child support dispute thinks that the judge is biased against him or her; it's very difficult for the parties involved to be objective. You and your ex each have biases and prejudices against the other. That's extremely common. So it's not surprising to me that you feel the way you do. But consider that an objective person looking at the same case may see it quite differently than you do. That's the position that the judge has — the judge has no stake in your case and only knows those things about you that you and your ex present in court. So what you see in the rulings is the view of someone from outside your relationship with your ex looking in.

 

[zddoodah]

I believe she may be trying to capitalize on things I've written to her about our judge. On a few cocktail filled, Friday night dinners soon after I had recently discovered she'd been completely trashing me to our children, I wrote her a piece of my mind. And it wasn't pretty. And within those emails are paragraphs where I completely trash our judge.

I can't tell if the term "cocktail filled" applies to you or your ex wife. If it applies to you, then you need to learn to control yourself when you've been drinking or get your drinking under control. "Trashing" the judge in writing to your ex-wife, with whom you apparently litigate with some frequency, is just plain stupid.

So assuming my wife tries to use this in court, how screwed am I?

I have no idea what a meaningful answer might be to a question like "how screwed am I." One would hope that, if the writings ever get in front of the judge, he or she will be professional enough not to let what you wrote influence his/her decision. But we obviously have no way of predicting how some unknown judge might react to something we haven't read.

 

[army judge]

I've written to her about our judge. On a few cocktail filled, Friday night dinners soon after I had recently discovered she'd been completely trashing me to our children, I wrote her a piece of my mind.

You have the RIGHT to remain silent.

You aren't required to aid in your prosecution.

If the messages do get reported to the judge, it'll have to be proven YOU wrote the messages.

Going forward I suggest you STOP communicating with the woman to whom you were formerly married about ANYTHING other than the welfare of your children.

If you suddenly are overcome by the urge to bash ANYONE simply put pen or pencil to paper and bash away.

Once you have fully vented, shred, burn, or otherwise DESTROY your missive.

No harm, no foul.

Again, ONLY communicate with the woman to whom you were formerly married about the welfare of your children, NOTHING else.

 

[leslie82]

My ex wife and I have been to court 3 times over custody and parenting time. Currently she has custody and has the children 60% of the time. Each and every time before we went to court, I made her an offer that she declined, only for her to be worse off than my offer after the judge ruled. She's the most unreasonable person I've ever known and is painfully stupid. So that's what I'm dealing with.

I'm worried my ex wife will soon take me to court to try and reduce my parenting time. I've not done anything worth reporting to my children to warrant any loss of parenting time. I'd say so if I did. So there's no issue there. But I believe she may be trying to capitalize on things I've written to her about our judge. On a few cocktail filled, Friday night dinners soon after I had recently discovered she'd been completely trashing me to our children, I wrote her a piece of my mind. And it wasn't pretty. And within those emails are paragraphs where I completely trash our judge.

Our judge is a far left radical socialist in Portland, OR who gives custody to the women 100% and has fleeced me for way over what the support calculator recommends, as well as hammering me in the divorce. She's not totally shut me out of the kids lives; I have 40% visitation time, but that's only because I'm an obviously good father and even the judge can see that.

Some will disagree with me and that's fine, but I said some jerkish things in the email about the fact she's a lesbian with no kids and she's trying to judge parents, yet has none of the parental instincts you get when you parent your own child. I said she shouldn't be allowed to judge and she's more of an activist than someone interested in what's best for the kids.

So yeah, that's brutal I know. So assuming my wife tries to use this in court, how screwed am I? That's basically my question. Please, to anyone reading this, don't waste time judging what I said to her. I'm not interested in debating that with anyone. I'm just trying to understand the potential consequences of what I wrote in the email. Thanks.

Is this for real or a troll post? If anyone is "painfully stupid" it's you. Everything you said has completely set yourself up for failure. It seems like that "radical" judge could see who you really are and that is why you have the visitation you have and no custody.

You know the consequences of what you said in your email. If you don't know - you are the dumbest person in the world.

Yes I will comment on what you said - it's all 100% wrong. It's so funny how someone who doesn't agree with the NCP has an "agenda" against that person. There's no agenda against you - you're just a horrible person.