Adoption - My Fiance wants to adopt my daughter

[twistedrhythm]

My fiance is going into the military and wants to adopt my daughter. My daughters father is on the birth certificate but is not in her life, i havent heard from him in months. My daughter will be two shortly. Do i need my ex bfs / my daughters fathers consent?

 

[Proserpina]

Yes, you need his consent.

And you'll need to be married for at least a few months, and likely a year.

You should speak with a local adoption attorney, because if your fiance is enlisting soon the adoption is NOT likely to happen before then.

 

[twistedrhythm]

so that is even if my ex bf is a bum doesnt support her, see her or anything? i dont even know if his phone number works let alone lives still in this state with his wife

 

[twistedrhythm]

somebody before told me, only if custody is established then i have to?... but we have nothing he just up and left

 

[Proserpina]

Yes, even if he's the biggest deadbeat bum in the world.

Dad is legally Dad - regardless of custody, at the very least he needs to be served and if you don't know where he is that's going to be difficult.

This is why you need an attorney.

(And yes, you still need to be married )

 

[twistedrhythm]

lol thank you, ehhh, this is going to be one long bumpy ride... thanks very much...
Hmm.. Now i guess to find a va lawyer in the peninsula who can help.

Thank you again so very much for all your time.

 

[Proserpina]

Good luck!

Please remember though - if you petition for adoption, Dad may well come back and want to actually be Dad to your child.

Then again if he does you can file for child support, too.

 

[twistedrhythm]

Sadly i think if i shoot for getting as much child support as i can it will scare him off

 

[Proserpina]

Well, you'd get state guidelines in terms of child support...and if you did file, there's a good chance he'd file for some sort of joint custody (or at the very least, visitation).

Just be prepared - it happens not uncommonly!