50/50 split custody question

[kyozetsu]

Jurisdiction

Pennsylvania

I have a 6 year old daughter with 50/50 split custody with the other parent. I have asked numerous times that on weekends which the other parent can not have my daughter overnight that we be asked to keep her if possible since shes my daughter and I believe in seeing her as much as possible.

However the other parent continually asks my mother to watch my daughter instead overnight stating that my mom loves seeing her grandchild and that she doesnt want to bother me with watching her every weekend she has her. I said if you can't watch her any weekends at all then why are we split custody?

Is there grounds to change the custodial agreement then if she cant be there?

 

[shrinkmaster]

You can legally pursue a change for any reason however what the other parent does with his/her time is NOT your concern unless it places child/ren in harms way

 

[mightymoose]

Usually the other parent has right of first refusal. If one parent can not care for the child, the other is consulted before arranging for the child to go with anyone else. This may be in your custody order already as it is common language.
Yes, if a parent is not using the time they have been awarded it could result in a change to the custody order. Keep a written log of these incidents to refer to later.
Talk to your mom about this too. Tell her to refuse and have the other parent contact you first.

however what the other parent does with his/her time is NOT your concern unless it places child/ren in harms way

Not true in this context.

 

[KatDini]

Usually the other parent has right of first refusal. If one parent can not care for the child, the other is consulted before arranging for the child to go with anyone else. This may be in your custody order already as it is common language.
Yes, if a parent is not using the time they have been awarded it could result in a change to the custody order. Keep a written log of these incidents to refer to later.
Talk to your mom about this too. Tell her to refuse and have the other parent contact you first.



Not true in this context.

Right of First Refusal is NOT common in custody orders. It would have to be requested when the custody orders are being decided upon.

However, OP needs to decide if Child spending time with Grandmother is really such a bad thing. It is not impacting OP's time at all. It benefits Child emotionally. And it's the Co-parent's time; would the OP like to have to send child to the Co-parent when they were going to be gone for whatever length of time is specified in the ROFR?

 

[mightymoose]

Perhaps it is something that varies by location. Right of first refusal language is almost always in the orders I've been presented. Usually when it is not in there it is the short orders that simply state "visitation as agreed".
Whatever the case, it is worth reviewing the order to see if it is addressed.

For what it's worth, if the child is left with a grandparent either parent can just go pick the child up. In this case it is the OP's parent and should not be difficult to sort out.

Yes, one parent's regular failure to make use of the visitation time allowed could be grounds to change the visitation order. I would suggest that not be pursued until a regular trend can be shown and efforts to resolve it on their own have failed.

 

[zddoodah]

You are free to ask the court to change your existing custody order under the circumstances you described. Determining whether it is likely that a court will order a change is something about which you'd have to confer with a local attorney.