Moving with child to new town, same state

[htirene26]

Jurisdiction

Washington

I have two children with someone that I am not married to, never have been married. My older son is moving to his dads this summer and may spend the school year with him. We both agreed that would be in our sons best interest. The father lives about two hours away. He is married and has a nice family for himself. So, with that being said I am moving this summer to a new town but in the same state and the same distance from the father but just the other direction from where we are now. I will be moving with my daughter to my fiance home. I told their father this and he said that I will need to be prepared to leave my daughter with him if I am moving into his house. He does not like my fiance but they both used to get along. I have known my fiance for 15 years.
The father of my kids has yet to agree to a parenting plan I have tried 3 times and it doesnt work out. He either does not agree or he purposely gets served with papers only the day before the court date and then doesnt show up. There is no parenting plan in place. He did not want someone to tell him how to be a parent is what he says. So now that I have plans to move and be happy with who I want, the father now thinks he has a say in what I do. Can he do anything to stop me from moving? He will still be seeing our daughter. What can I do to make sure I can finally do what I want to do? Could he get custody of her just because he doesnt like where I am going? I am so lost and scared because he has threatened me in the past about this before which is why I have lived where I am for 5 years because he knows how to make me feel like I have to listen to him. I have the kid full time and have had them full time since they were born. I would really appreciate any advice and/or help you may have. Thank you for your time

 

[army judge]

I suggest you retain an attorney to secure you court ordered child support, custody, and visitation.

A child born out of wedlock has only one legal parent, the birth mother. An unmarried male must first establish paternity, then seek a court order to establish custody, visitation, and child support.

If your children aren't covered by any court order, you're free to live where you wish. It's unwise to allow YOUR children to visit with any male not covered by a court order.

You were always free to do whatever you choose. You're an adult, and not answerable to a male because he allegedly is the father of your children.

That said, marry anyone you wish, live a happy life, and don't worry about some loser male who failed to recognize you for the great mother you are, and the perfect spouse you choose to be.

If I were you and no court order exists, I wouldn't let my child visit with the bully that pretends to be a father when it's convenient. You're a full time mom, which means you don't need a part time dad. Stop communicating with that bully. He doesn't own you or your children.

If he goes to court to establish paternity, child support, and visitation, the works will end. He's all talk and likes to bully women. Stop allowing him to control you, which means stop talking to him, and work on your family.

 

[Michael Wechsler]

If there wasn't any acrimony then there may not have been a need to rock the boat. I think that if there is an issue such as this one where there is no resolution, you've only got one choice to make and you've heard above about what the law is regarding legal custody of a child born out of wedlock. You may have some leverage and perhaps now it is time to settle things. Good luck.