My mothers husband passed recently and he left my mother an insurance policy which we were going to put into an annuity. Given the economics an annuity would have given only a small return at 1.3% (We did meet with a financial adviser) My mother had offered to pay off my high interest rate Mortgage and help me start a "small" business (not a lot of money was used to launch this business) In return we had agreed that i would pay her 3% on the loan and payments would start as soon as I got the business up and profitable and that she was to cancel a life insurance policy she had taken out (without anyone's knowledge) with me as beneficiary. The loan to me was to be forgiven upon her death. She still has plenty of money available to her to live on for the next 5 years. (mind you her husband and her had only planned on her living for 5 years as they had a pact that she got 5 years with her family and then "she was to join him") My mother was constantly trying to get me to "go big" with the business but i would not invest another dime at this time. She always said "if the biz fails at least we all have a house paid off and will always have a roof over our heads"
My problem now is that i went to my mothers house one day to find an envelope with a few thousand dollars sitting on her desk. It was suppose to be in her safe for emergencies i.e. a hurricane. All of her bank and online passwords are taped to her wall over her desk.....and she has a new housekeeper who she immediately gave a key to her home. I thought it best to put the cash in the bank rather than having it out like that. Apparently she didn't like that idea and has now decided to tell everyone that i stole over $200K from her (i have emails where she admits 'loaning' me $186k. She has hired an attorney who has sent me a promissory note to sign but it is not written to what our verbal agreement was. My mother says if i don't sign it we will go to court. Do I have to sign this? Would it be best to not give her a written agreement at all or just provide her with one that spells out what we had agreed to? She had threatened me with embezzlement but i think has since found out she can't do that. I was also joint on her accounts as she couldn't even balance a checkbook.
Mind you, my mother is 72 years old, has alzheimer's, a pacemaker, 2 heart attacks in the past 15 months, she swears she had a stroke in February, takes anti-depressants,sleeping pills, zanax and Fentynal (narcotic) for pain on a daily basis. She turned in her drivers license 5 years ago because she didn't feel it safe to drive yet has just recently has gone and gotten a new one and bought herself a new car. During the time her husband was suffering and dying she couldn't even go to the grocery store as it was "just to much for her", but since the day of his death she is running all over town - with no cane, walker or scooter anymore!
Her words and actions to me are her merely acting out because she has never had any money in her life, she has a shopping 'problem' and doesn't like it when i would take she shopping and ask when she was buying some unnecessary item "if she really needed that." I am hurt by her words, especially in light of the fact that we have not had a relationship with each other in over 25 years, yet I dropped everything in my life to take care of her and her dying husband. I do not regret taking care of him.....he was a wonderful person! I also fear that her talking all over town about me is going to effect my business. The people she talks to would not know her history as she is new in town and she is playing the poor pitiful widow who has been neglected and robbed card.
Any advice is greatly appreciated.
My problem now is that i went to my mothers house one day to find an envelope with a few thousand dollars sitting on her desk. It was suppose to be in her safe for emergencies i.e. a hurricane. All of her bank and online passwords are taped to her wall over her desk.....and she has a new housekeeper who she immediately gave a key to her home. I thought it best to put the cash in the bank rather than having it out like that. Apparently she didn't like that idea and has now decided to tell everyone that i stole over $200K from her (i have emails where she admits 'loaning' me $186k. She has hired an attorney who has sent me a promissory note to sign but it is not written to what our verbal agreement was. My mother says if i don't sign it we will go to court. Do I have to sign this? Would it be best to not give her a written agreement at all or just provide her with one that spells out what we had agreed to? She had threatened me with embezzlement but i think has since found out she can't do that. I was also joint on her accounts as she couldn't even balance a checkbook.
Mind you, my mother is 72 years old, has alzheimer's, a pacemaker, 2 heart attacks in the past 15 months, she swears she had a stroke in February, takes anti-depressants,sleeping pills, zanax and Fentynal (narcotic) for pain on a daily basis. She turned in her drivers license 5 years ago because she didn't feel it safe to drive yet has just recently has gone and gotten a new one and bought herself a new car. During the time her husband was suffering and dying she couldn't even go to the grocery store as it was "just to much for her", but since the day of his death she is running all over town - with no cane, walker or scooter anymore!
Her words and actions to me are her merely acting out because she has never had any money in her life, she has a shopping 'problem' and doesn't like it when i would take she shopping and ask when she was buying some unnecessary item "if she really needed that." I am hurt by her words, especially in light of the fact that we have not had a relationship with each other in over 25 years, yet I dropped everything in my life to take care of her and her dying husband. I do not regret taking care of him.....he was a wonderful person! I also fear that her talking all over town about me is going to effect my business. The people she talks to would not know her history as she is new in town and she is playing the poor pitiful widow who has been neglected and robbed card.
Any advice is greatly appreciated.
