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[Cha_Cha]

I will preface this by saying, I am the paternal grandmother of a little girl that has just turned 5 years old. My son and her mother are divorced. My son, at the time what I am about to tell you about, was a long distance truck driver. My granddaughter in June 2003 had extensive medical test done, due to the fact she was not talking, she had tremors, she had no interest in being potty trained, etc. She was said to have developmental delays. No reason was found for it.

In Dec. 2003, she started to talk a little bit. In March 2004, she told me and my daughter about abuse that had been going on while she was in her mothers care. She named the person, who had been doing this to her. DSS, was called, law enforcement got involved.
This started the ongoing court dates in family court, starting in April 2004.( Law enforcement investigation still ongoing)

She was placed in my custody, by DSS and the court system. After extensive investigations by DSS, and the court appointed GAL, Dr.'s reports, psych exams, therapist reports, etc. all were in agreement that the child should remain in my custody. The judge was in complete agreement, all reports wanted the child protected and never to go back in the mothers care.
The judge who was hearing this case everytime was in complete agreement, with all reports turned in, all recomendations made by the GAL attorney, and the county attorney. In June 2004, the mothers court appointed attorney stated she could no longer represent the mother, not because of conflict of interest with her, but with the mothers boyfriend.

In Sept. 2004, we go back into court, another judge was on the bench. The mother hired a new attorney, which we had to wait 2 hours for to show up in court. When the case is called the judge calls all attorneys into chambers, comes out, makes the ruling he is working on reunification with the mother and child, starting with unsupervised visits with the mother and her boyfriend.( The boyfriend has been named in several DSS reports for sexual abuse, has substance abuse problems, domestic violence problems, has a long list of arrests, one being, indecent liberties with a minor)

Everyone involved in this case is in disbelief.

We go back to court Dec. 2004, the previous judge we had always seen, except in Sept. is on the bench. It looks as if she is going to get things back in order with this case, when the phone rings in court. It is the district court judge, who was on the bench in Sept., the clerk who answered the phone is chatting it up with this judge, then takes a message, and passes it to the mothers attorney. Well, now, the sitting judge states she will follow the previous ruling made in Sept. She states I have to be home 3 nights a week so the mother can call the child, and I have to turn the child over for unsupervised vsits every saturday. I ask this judge could I speak in court, she said no. The GAL attorney really fought for this child, but the judge had no interest in anything this attorney or the county attorney had to say. The judge stated the mother should keep going to PA meetings, that this would help her not make the same mistakes.

How many chances, should a parent get to screw up a child's life?

Everyone is in disbelief again.

I forgot to mention that since the child has been in my care she is in preschool, completely up to her level. She is now a normal 5 year old little girl, with no tremors, talking all the time, and is happy, for the first time in her life.

Any advice or help appreciated. Have any ethical codes been broken?

 

[Michael Wechsler]

This hits a major sore spot for me -- unfortunately you are not alone. If there is one item on my agenda where I'd like to help make a change it's in custody issues. I don't know all the facts of your case (and what their defenses are) and there could be legitimate reasons for all this. That said, I would not doubt it if 100% of your story is true. Sadly, unless you can resort to some type of activity which would place the court's scrutiny under pressure to take the more reasonable route, these injustices will continue to occur for the benefit of the "liberties" afforded to wrongdoers and at the expense of the children. Calling the news is one method. Sending notices to government officials is another. It may not get you somewhere because of so many cases like this but, then again, someone might want to deal with the eventual fiasco.

I would not have believed what can happen in the court system until I personally bore witness to a small court in Alabama permitting something incredible, what in my mind is tantamout to a legal kidnapping of two minors. Mrs. X has a daughter and a boy she has been a long time guardian. Her mother and her mother's husband traveled from Colorado to a small Alabama court where the family lived, claimed to be grandparents of both children and made numerous false representations in their brief and some absurd allegations about the Mrs. X's mental disorders. IMHO, much of this was accomplished given the high powered attorney and a backdoor courtroom procedure where nothing is recorded. No inquiry made. The children were ripped out of school and transported out of state and the mother was left crying when she came to school to pick up her children and was met by the sheriff and a team of officers.

We haven't even discussed the fact that the grandmother has a long sordid history that includes a bizarre divorce, neglect of her children, and a son who hasn't talked to her in decades because of what she put the children through.

I then watched a Colorado guardian ad litem listen to all this, agree that this information was shocking, and then manipulate the process into dragging it out as long as possible with meaningless mediations while leaving the child in the home of the "grandmother" who is of no legal relation to the boy whatsoever. The girl was returned home because on a subsequent hearing regarding the girl the Alabama court found that most of the allegations were nothing but a farce. The transcript is shocking as the grandmother loses and actually states her lack of concern for her own pregnant daughter's welfare. It's shocking.

Despite all of this, the guardian ad litem has still kept the boy in Colorado, with the grandmother who is a single woman now since her husband died quite a while ago. Obviously from reading all of this you can see that it is important to me. What is most unsettling is that I haven't even given you half of just how bad this story really gets -- yet the boy is still unjustly held, to his significant detriment, with an old woman with a crazy history, a revealing outburst in court, and away from the only mother he has ever known.

Final thought: A call to the Alabama bar yielded total indifference. They told me it happens and didn't care to stay on the phone much longer. I'm thinking of attempting to create an organized section here where victims can place well constructed pages of information to put pressure on these people in power to do what any reasonable person would do to put the childrens health and welfare FIRST. There comes a point where politics and money should have no place and that there is complete sanctuary from avarice.

Wishing you the best of luck and assistance in any way I or we can.

The only way I think you can combat a true "corruption" of our system is sometimes by going to the press. However, one has to think of the child and also what it may do to your family if you do. At this point you still have custody and that is good.

I will preface this by saying, I am the paternal grandmother of a little girl that has just turned 5 years old. My son and her mother are divorced. My son, at the time what I am about to tell you about, was a long distance truck driver. My granddaughter in June 2003 had extensive medical test done, due to the fact she was not talking, she had tremors, she had no interest in being potty trained, etc. She was said to have developmental delays. No reason was found for it.

In Dec. 2003, she started to talk a little bit. In March 2004, she told me and my daughter about abuse that had been going on while she was in her mothers care. She named the person, who had been doing this to her. DSS, was called, law enforcement got involved.
This started the ongoing court dates in family court, starting in April 2004.( Law enforcement investigation still ongoing)

She was placed in my custody, by DSS and the court system. After extensive investigations by DSS, and the court appointed GAL, Dr.'s reports, psych exams, therapist reports, etc. all were in agreement that the child should remain in my custody. The judge was in complete agreement, all reports wanted the child protected and never to go back in the mothers care.
The judge who was hearing this case everytime was in complete agreement, with all reports turned in, all recomendations made by the GAL attorney, and the county attorney. In June 2004, the mothers court appointed attorney stated she could no longer represent the mother, not because of conflict of interest with her, but with the mothers boyfriend.

In Sept. 2004, we go back into court, another judge was on the bench. The mother hired a new attorney, which we had to wait 2 hours for to show up in court. When the case is called the judge calls all attorneys into chambers, comes out, makes the ruling he is working on reunification with the mother and child, starting with unsupervised visits with the mother and her boyfriend.( The boyfriend has been named in several DSS reports for sexual abuse, has substance abuse problems, domestic violence problems, has a long list of arrests, one being, indecent liberties with a minor)

Everyone involved in this case is in disbelief.

We go back to court Dec. 2004, the previous judge we had always seen, except in Sept. is on the bench. It looks as if she is going to get things back in order with this case, when the phone rings in court. It is the district court judge, who was on the bench in Sept., the clerk who answered the phone is chatting it up with this judge, then takes a message, and passes it to the mothers attorney. Well, now, the sitting judge states she will follow the previous ruling made in Sept. She states I have to be home 3 nights a week so the mother can call the child, and I have to turn the child over for unsupervised vsits every saturday. I ask this judge could I speak in court, she said no. The GAL attorney really fought for this child, but the judge had no interest in anything this attorney or the county attorney had to say. The judge stated the mother should keep going to PA meetings, that this would help her not make the same mistakes.

How many chances, should a parent get to screw up a child's life?

Everyone is in disbelief again.

I forgot to mention that since the child has been in my care she is in preschool, completely up to her level. She is now a normal 5 year old little girl, with no tremors, talking all the time, and is happy, for the first time in her life.

Any advice or help appreciated. Have any ethical codes been broken?