My mom is a trustee of my g'ma, my dad says he will take it?

[Andromeda]

Jurisdiction

Missouri

My mom and dad are getting divorce due to my dad having an affair. My mom "knew" to an extent that something was going on for awhile and my grandma was also suspicious. Surprise! He was having an affair and even had a child.

Due to my grandma pretty confident that he was she wanted to make sure just in case that my mom and myself were taken care of. So she put her assets into a trust and made my mom the sole trustee. My dad filed himself yesterday and my mom had been talking to an attorney a bit ago preparing things but never got into this question as she was confident that it would be protected. She called her attorney and found out he just had open heart surgery and plans to retire. So she had to get a new one and is waiting on a call back. We are both freaking out now as my dad said his attorney told him that he would end up with her assets anyhow (regardless of the trust), specifically one of her houses she left me. Yes he is being crappy already.

So my question is how do trusts work? I was under the impression that if you setup a trust and designate a trustee that the assets are protected? How is he able to just take everything after their divorce is finalized? My grandmother is also still alive, so my mom isn't sitting there with the trust to distribute I guess?

Anyways I hope this all makes sense, I know this needs to be addressed by an estate attorney. But my mom called me very upset of course and may not get in right away so I was hoping someone could shed some light on this?

 

[Andromeda]

My dad ended up having an affair, getting the lady pregnant and abandoned my mom awhile back. During this period she has still been getting a paycheck each week. As my dad owns a business and just gave himself a second one for his new family. He filed for divorce a few days ago and my mom is waiting to hear back from an attorney. She obviously is a complete wreck. She is extremely worried that he is going to just stop having a check deposited (out of spite) and she will no longer be able to pay the (their) bills. Including a mortgage. It seems stupid that HE would be spiteful but that's irrelevant, he is just an fairly crappy person.

So I was going to ask around and see if anyone knew what he can or cannot do? My mom has been a housewife her entire life (64), they have been married for 40 years and she never got an education mostly due to him needing her to stay home with me. So she has no way to support herself. So to get to the point, can he just stop supporting her during the divorce process? As I said most of their debt is co-owned and she has to make the payments. But is worried any day now that she will be homeless?

Thank you for the help!

 

[zddoodah]

Is the grandmother referenced in this post your father's mother or your mother's mother?

Due to my grandma pretty confident that he was she wanted to make sure just in case that my mom and myself were taken care of. So she put her assets into a trust and made my mom the sole trustee.

I don't really understand why your grandmother's suspicions about your father's adultery would motivate her to create a trust, but ok....

My dad filed himself yesterday

He "filed himself"? Are you talking about filing for divorce?

my mom had been talking to an attorney a bit ago preparing things but never got into this question

What question?

she was confident that it would be protected.

What is "it"? Protected from what?

We are both freaking out now as my dad said his attorney told him that he would end up with her assets anyhow (regardless of the trust)

Whose assets? Your mother's assets or your grandmother's assets?

Also, Litigation 101: Don't listen to what your opponent claims his lawyer told him.

specifically one of her houses she left me.

Are you talking about a house that your grandmother transferred to her trust? A gift given by your grandmother to you in a trust has nothing at all to do with your parents' divorce.

So my question is how do trusts work?

There are several books of several hundred pages each that discuss this phenomenally general question. For some basics, read this.

I was under the impression that if you setup a trust and designate a trustee that the assets are protected?

Despite your use of a question mark, this sentence isn't a question. Perhaps you intended to ask if your impression is correct.

Where did you get this impression? Protected from what? There are some types of trust that offer some protection against certain things. In its most basic form, however, a trust is nothing more than a means by which one person (the trustor or settlor) transfers assets to a person called the trustee for the benefit of a person called the beneficiary. Note that the trustor and trustee may be the same person, and that person may also be the beneficiary.

How is he able to just take everything after their divorce is finalized?

So...you're asking us how your father is able to do something that he claimed he can do without actually knowing if his claim is legit or BS. Needless to say, we have no information about your grandmother's trust or any of your parents' marital assets and known nothing about the situation beyond what you told us (which isn't much). Beyond my comment about (that there is no apparent connection between your parents' divorce and assets owed in your grandmother's trust), there's no way for anyone to address this issue.

My grandmother is also still alive, so my mom isn't sitting there with the trust to distribute I guess?

Again, not a question, and again, we obviously don't know what your grandmother's trust says.

I know this needs to be addressed by an estate attorney.

I disagree. Given that your grandmother is still alive, there likely isn't anything to address.

But my mom called me very upset of course and may not get in right away so I was hoping someone could shed some light on this?

If your mother is the trustee of a trust and doesn't understand how trusts work, then she probably should hire an attorney to assist her in administering the trust. And, of course, if she doesn't have an attorney representing her in the divorce, that would be a good idea as well.

 

[Andromeda]

I am so sorry I wrote up such a crappy question!

Maybe I can clarify things, or just more gibberish but I will try.

My grandmother holds a lot of assets that were separate from my grandfather. He wanted to leave my dad everything, including the family business. But due to having a business their property was kept in only my grandmothers name. He made both my grandmother and dad co-trustees with my dad as the sole beneficiary. My grandfather passed away many years ago. So my grandma wants to give my mom nearly everything in her name outside of one of the houses (she has 3). Which is what I was inheriting. My mom is the sole trustee of my grandma's estate.

Hopefully that makes a bit more sense?

The weird part is that my dad specifically asked his attorney about the house I was getting. I still work at our family business but our relationship is a bit shaky these days. He is also very greedy. According to his attorney he will end up the sole beneficiary of my grandma's will. Including my inheritance.

This is my dads mom, so maybe that has something to do with it? My mom thought as the trustee she distributed everything out. And that my dad would not be able to touch anything in it (as nothing was left to him).

I apologize if this still doesn't make any sense. And yes my mom is waiting on a call back. But I thought I would ask around just to get some input and clarification.

 

[zddoodah]

So I was going to ask around and see if anyone knew what he can or cannot do?

You likely know far better than anyone here what your father's abilities are. If you're saying that your father's paycheck is being deposited into a joint account with your mother and that your mother is using that money to pay bills, it's certainly possible that your father could stop that at any time.

My mom has been a housewife her entire life (64), they have been married for 40 years and she never got an education mostly due to him needing her to stay home with me. So she has no way to support herself. So to get to the point, can he just stop supporting her during the divorce process?

Yes, he can. And she can petition the court for an order requiring that he pay alimony while the divorce is pending. Under the circumstances described, it is more likely than not that your mother will be entitled to permanent alimony (unless she marries someone else). Your mother should also discuss with her attorney asking the court to order your father to pay her attorneys' fees.

 

[zddoodah]

My mom is the sole trustee of my grandma's estate.

Your grandmother doesn't have an estate and won't have an estate until she dies. I assume you meant that your grandmother made your mother the sole trustee of her trust (as you wrote in your initial post). However, now you've told us something new: that your grandfather "made both [your] grandmother and dad co-trustees with [your] dad as the sole beneficiary." Co-trustees of what? Beneficiary of what? Does this refer to the same trust (which would, presumably, mean that your mother changed the trust from her and your father being co-trustees and your father being the beneficiary to your mother being sole trustee and your mother and you being beneficiaries)?

My mom thought as the trustee she distributed everything out. And that my dad would not be able to touch anything in it (as nothing was left to him).

There's no way for anyone who hasn't read the trust (and any amendments) to form any reliable conclusions about what it does and doesn't provide.

 

[Andromeda]

I appreciate your response! I am hoping that doesn't happen obviously. But as you know divorces can get really nasty. This wasn't good news, but as mentioned she is waiting on a call back. Speaking of alimony, especially during the case do you have any idea what they would base that off of? I assume there are too many factors at play to even know.

 

[Andromeda]

My grandfather had his own trust, that contained the company. He left my dad and grandma "co-trustees". But from what I have heard it's locked down (what ever it's called) so only my dad can be a beneficiary.

My grandma has her own trust with the things that were only in her name. She made my mom the sole-trustee of it.

My grandma wanted both of us to be beneficiary's of it. Now my dad is doing what he can to take it. Well become the sole beneficiary I guess.

I can tell that your getting really annoyed, I am sorry. I just had no idea my dad would be able to swoop in and take our inheritance.

 

[zddoodah]

You can google "missouri divorce alimony factors." However, if you're asking about the amount, it will primarily be based on your father's income.

 

[Andromeda]

This is a very weird question... bare with me.

My grandmother's home that she solely owns seems to be in my grandfathers trust. How that is even possible is beyond me. But she has since made her own personal trust and put her home inside of it. Which means technically it's in two different trusts. My grandfather has since passed away and set his up to be non-revocable. But technically it includes someone else's property. Has anyone ever heard of this? I assume when my grandmother set her own one up that she was confused. My question is considering the other trust contains her personal property and she now has her own with it listed does it "trump" the other? I thought maybe her attorney did know that it would just override it and it was a non-issue. She set it up several years ago. I only learned this due to my dad looking into my grandfathers (he is sole beneficiary) and checking to see if he will get the house.

Just curious if anyone has heard of that?

 

[zddoodah]

I can tell that your getting really annoyed, I am sorry. I just had no idea my dad would be able to swoop in and take our inheritance.

I'm not at all annoyed. I do, however, find it very odd that you seem to be assume that what your father told your mother is necessarily true just because he said it (I also assume you weren't a party to that conversation so that you don't have firsthand knowledge of what he actually said).

My grandmother's home that she solely owns seems to be in my grandfathers trust. How that is even possible is beyond me.

It's not possible. If the house is "in [your] grandfather's trust," then it's not possible that "she solely owns" the house (and vice versa).

My grandfather has since passed away and set his up to be non-revocable.

Just to clarify, the standard revocable trust that is commonly used for estate planning purposes become irrevocable once the trustor dies.

But technically it includes someone else's property. Has anyone ever heard of this?

I'm obviously not sure what you're basing any of this on, but there's nothing "technical" about any of this. The only way to "put" real property "in" a trust is for the property to be deeded to the trustee of the trust. You can ascertain who owns the house in question by looking at the deed down at the county clerk or county recorder's office (or wherever real property records are maintained in ___ County, Missouri). Until you do that, concerning yourself about which trust the property is "in" is unproductive.

If you've already done this and have a copy of the deed, please tell us how it is titled. Quote it exactly as it reads (with actual names changed or removed, of course).