minor birth mother forced to give up baby for adoption

[susanmarie]

How does the law affect a 16 year old girl, who is pregnant, when her parent's are forcing her to give the child up for adoption? The baby's father is "unknown", so there is no paternal involvement.

 

[Michael Wechsler]

I do not believe that a person can be forced to have an abortion. In fact, it may be illegal in your jurisdication. Understand that certain threats, e.g. we won't permit you to have any use of our car, etc. are not the same thing.

However, especially since you don't know the father, I urge you to seriously consider the factors in your situation and decision. The consequences to you, and especially your child, in deciding to keep and care for a child at such a young age can be truly devastating for years to come. Unfortunately, I have seen this happen to some wonderful people who can relate to you the immense difficulties they experienced from deciding to keep the child. There are probably some very good reasons you have for you to carry to term. However, you should probably seek counseling long before you become involved with the legalities. This is a very important time to accumulate information and listen to those who may be in a good position to assist you both emotionally and with regard to information.

Remember, the child will be your responsibility forever -- that is a significant social and financial commitment. It may be very difficult to determine who the father is to assist you with financial support. These points cannot be understated and I wish you the best with your decisions and your life.

 

[susanmarie]

I'm sorry for the confusion... I'm trying to get a specific answer without going into too much personal detail, and that obviously doesn't work. Here's the deal. I was adopted, in 1973. Now, my birth mother is coming forward, and trying to beome a part of my life. I'm on the fence about how I feel about the whole situation. I never really thought much about my birth parents...
But, now here's this woman, and she's telling me that the only reason that she gave me up was because she was underage, and it was her parent's decision, not hers. In fact, she's stating that she never signed any adoption papers, that her parents are the only ones who signed. They had power of attorney, while she was a minor. Since she refused to divulge the identity of the birth father, he and his family never became involved.
I'm on the net, trying to discover if this is even possible, or if she's trying to win me over with some sob story. I'm not sure if you can answer my question or not... or even if the answer is going to affect how I deal with this woman. But, I'm curious.
If you can't answer me, maybe you can point me in the right direction - who else can I ask?
Thanks,

 

[Michael Wechsler]

Did you discuss this matter with your parents? Additionally, you may wish to probe the woman for details and do some checking based upon the information, e.g. geographical, how did her parents obtain the power of attorney, how did she find you, etc. as obtaining information might be difficult without having more. You may wonder why she refuses to divulge the father's name, which would seem odd... I doubt that the identity of the birth father in an adoption proceeding (where the information may have been sealed) is going to be information that is freely available over the Internet. I'd think that you will probably want to obtain as much information as you can and then do your own research.

This may all be a hoax, but then again, it may not. It makes you wonder why this woman would go through all the trouble to find you. Perhaps this is also something you should think about and whether you might regret blowing her off later... perhaps this is more important than the legal although it is always important to be very careful...