- Jurisdiction
- Minnesota
Two days ago the police showed up at my house to talk to my twelve year old son. Against my better judgment, I allowed them to talk to him. He was at a hockey warming house with a friend and another boy's parents called the police to say my son and his friend had pulled their pants down and rubbed their naked butts on the other boy, as well as thrust their pelvis's at him.
When the officer arrived at my house, he had already gotten a statement from the "victim" and my son's friend. My son's friend corroborated with the "victim's" story.
As the officer began getting my son's statement, my son sat blinking his eyes not knowing what to say. I thought it was because he was just playing stupid In hindsight, I know it's because he was scared shitless (he had never had a dealing with an officer prior to this). He admitted to pulling his pants down exposing his butt. Because the officer had already received a statement from the friend, he kept telling my son he needed to admit to rubbing his butt on the victim - that he knew what happened (that both of the other boys said that's what happened) and he needed to admit to it. He kept prompting him to say he rubbed his butt on the other kid. My son finally admitted it (only for him to tell me the next day that he did not rub his butt on the kid, but that he said he did because the cop kept telling him he needed to say he did). The cop then wrote my son a ticket for disorderly conduct and let us know he would need to go to court. He also told him he should apologize to the other kid the next time he sees him. The cop then goes out to his car getting ready to leave.
As the cop sits in his car getting ready to go, my son tells me he isn't going to apologize to the other kid because he was calling him the N word before it happened (my son is mixed), and my son's friend asked the victim "Are you allowed to say that word?", to which the kid replied "Yeah". I called the cop back in and had my son tell him this. The cop said he was going to call my son's friend and ask him to corroborate this and that he "better say the same thing". The cop called him and he corroborated, and the cop was going to go back and talk to the victim's parents again, and I assume this will be a part of the police report now.
After the cop left, I was pissed at my son, and it was 10:00 on a school night. I told him I didn't want to talk about it anymore that night and told him to go to bed.
The next day, after my anger had eased a bit, he told me that he didn't actually rub his butt on the kid. He said he only said that because the cop told him that's what he needed to say. He also told me that prior to them pulling their butts out, after the kid had called him the N word, the kid pushed him down, and my son heard his friend say "I think you knocked him out". I asked my son why he didn't tell the cop this and he said it's because he was scared. He also said he didn't tell me after the cop left that night because I was pissed at him and I told him I didn't want to talk about it anymore that night.
Hindsight is 20/20. I now realize I shouldn't have even let my son talk to the cop. In addition, I also realize that the cop had a story he wanted my son to admit to and he prompted him to get the story he wanted. He basically scared my son into admitting rubbing his butt on the kid when he really didn't do it. I feel like the cop was out to get my son.
If in fact the "victim" did do what my son said he did (which I believe to be true), the victim could possibly be charged with a hate crime, however this information is not currently a part of the police report. I also will not get a copy of the police report for two to three weeks to see exactly what is in it.
At this point, what do I do? Do I:
A) Go down to the police station and tell them I feel like they were coercing my son into saying he did things that he didn't? And tell them that my son was scared, he's just a 12 year old boy, and that he has new details to tell them? According to the county, the police report will go to the county attorney now and he will decide whether or not to press charges. If charges are pressed they will have to go to court.
B) Call and talk to the county attorney and let him know there are more details to the report (prior to him making a decision on whether to charge my son)
C) Lawyer up?
My son is heavily involved in sports and I do not want this ruining his future in sports, or any of his future for that matter. What he did was totally wrong, however the other kid should not be getting away with what he did, and the cops should not have been leading my son into the statement he wanted to hear. The cop didn't come to our house to get my son statement. He came to our house to make my son tell him the story he wanted to hear.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you
When the officer arrived at my house, he had already gotten a statement from the "victim" and my son's friend. My son's friend corroborated with the "victim's" story.
As the officer began getting my son's statement, my son sat blinking his eyes not knowing what to say. I thought it was because he was just playing stupid In hindsight, I know it's because he was scared shitless (he had never had a dealing with an officer prior to this). He admitted to pulling his pants down exposing his butt. Because the officer had already received a statement from the friend, he kept telling my son he needed to admit to rubbing his butt on the victim - that he knew what happened (that both of the other boys said that's what happened) and he needed to admit to it. He kept prompting him to say he rubbed his butt on the other kid. My son finally admitted it (only for him to tell me the next day that he did not rub his butt on the kid, but that he said he did because the cop kept telling him he needed to say he did). The cop then wrote my son a ticket for disorderly conduct and let us know he would need to go to court. He also told him he should apologize to the other kid the next time he sees him. The cop then goes out to his car getting ready to leave.
As the cop sits in his car getting ready to go, my son tells me he isn't going to apologize to the other kid because he was calling him the N word before it happened (my son is mixed), and my son's friend asked the victim "Are you allowed to say that word?", to which the kid replied "Yeah". I called the cop back in and had my son tell him this. The cop said he was going to call my son's friend and ask him to corroborate this and that he "better say the same thing". The cop called him and he corroborated, and the cop was going to go back and talk to the victim's parents again, and I assume this will be a part of the police report now.
After the cop left, I was pissed at my son, and it was 10:00 on a school night. I told him I didn't want to talk about it anymore that night and told him to go to bed.
The next day, after my anger had eased a bit, he told me that he didn't actually rub his butt on the kid. He said he only said that because the cop told him that's what he needed to say. He also told me that prior to them pulling their butts out, after the kid had called him the N word, the kid pushed him down, and my son heard his friend say "I think you knocked him out". I asked my son why he didn't tell the cop this and he said it's because he was scared. He also said he didn't tell me after the cop left that night because I was pissed at him and I told him I didn't want to talk about it anymore that night.
Hindsight is 20/20. I now realize I shouldn't have even let my son talk to the cop. In addition, I also realize that the cop had a story he wanted my son to admit to and he prompted him to get the story he wanted. He basically scared my son into admitting rubbing his butt on the kid when he really didn't do it. I feel like the cop was out to get my son.
If in fact the "victim" did do what my son said he did (which I believe to be true), the victim could possibly be charged with a hate crime, however this information is not currently a part of the police report. I also will not get a copy of the police report for two to three weeks to see exactly what is in it.
At this point, what do I do? Do I:
A) Go down to the police station and tell them I feel like they were coercing my son into saying he did things that he didn't? And tell them that my son was scared, he's just a 12 year old boy, and that he has new details to tell them? According to the county, the police report will go to the county attorney now and he will decide whether or not to press charges. If charges are pressed they will have to go to court.
B) Call and talk to the county attorney and let him know there are more details to the report (prior to him making a decision on whether to charge my son)
C) Lawyer up?
My son is heavily involved in sports and I do not want this ruining his future in sports, or any of his future for that matter. What he did was totally wrong, however the other kid should not be getting away with what he did, and the cops should not have been leading my son into the statement he wanted to hear. The cop didn't come to our house to get my son statement. He came to our house to make my son tell him the story he wanted to hear.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you
