slcollins01
New Member
Brief history: Met in March 2005, he was separated. He and his children (ages 4 & 9) of which he shares custody, moved into my home with my teenage daughter and I in July 2005 . (I invited him as he was losing his home during bankruptcy.) We became engaged in October 2005. His previous divorce was finalized in April 2006. We were married in August 2006. September 2006, he convinced (yes, convinced) me that we needed a new vehicle b/c the two that we owned were not large enough for a family of five. I argued the point b/c we were not all traveling together very often and I did NOT want a car payment. He promised that w/both incomes, there would be no worries. We searched for weeks, test drove vehicles and finally purchased a used SUV for approximately $14,000. I should say that "I" purchased it although he was involved every step of the way, except for the actual purchase. He is under Chapter 13 Bankruptcy and cannot legally sign for a loan. Fast forward to April 7 2007, he informs me that he is "done." He does not want to work on a relationship for the remainder of his life, he loves me, but he wants out. No discussion. No counseling. No idea why on my part as he won't say anything other than... He's not good for me.
I am in shock. (really an understatement, maybe when I don't feel gut-punched, I'll find the more suitable word.)
A week later, I am starting to wonder about the ramifications of some of the financial things that transpired during the brief relationship. 1) He owed back taxes to the Fed. Gov't for 2005. I allowed our "joint" refund to go toward paying those off this year. I have since filed an "Injured Spouse" form with the IRS to return my portion of the refund to me. 2) I assisted in paying his divorce attorney fees from his last divorce. Payments were made out of our joint-account, but I wonder if I can ask for reimbursement for part of that as I realize that w/o my assistance, he may still be paying. 3) The vehicle purchase. Clearly, I do not need an SUV (or the higher insurance for that matter.) for my 16 year old and I. I still have my previous vehicle which is paid for. His mother and step-father gave him a larger vehicle a couple of weeks ago, so he doesn't need the SUV either. His income is $20,000 more annually than mine. He has no mortgage payments, (the house is mine, purchased years prior to the marriage.) He wants a quick simple do-it-yourself divorce, w/me keeping my house but also getting the SUV. He slides out, no harm, no foul, no debt, no worries. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance. ~S
I am in shock. (really an understatement, maybe when I don't feel gut-punched, I'll find the more suitable word.)
A week later, I am starting to wonder about the ramifications of some of the financial things that transpired during the brief relationship. 1) He owed back taxes to the Fed. Gov't for 2005. I allowed our "joint" refund to go toward paying those off this year. I have since filed an "Injured Spouse" form with the IRS to return my portion of the refund to me. 2) I assisted in paying his divorce attorney fees from his last divorce. Payments were made out of our joint-account, but I wonder if I can ask for reimbursement for part of that as I realize that w/o my assistance, he may still be paying. 3) The vehicle purchase. Clearly, I do not need an SUV (or the higher insurance for that matter.) for my 16 year old and I. I still have my previous vehicle which is paid for. His mother and step-father gave him a larger vehicle a couple of weeks ago, so he doesn't need the SUV either. His income is $20,000 more annually than mine. He has no mortgage payments, (the house is mine, purchased years prior to the marriage.) He wants a quick simple do-it-yourself divorce, w/me keeping my house but also getting the SUV. He slides out, no harm, no foul, no debt, no worries. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance. ~S
