I have an emergency situation. My grandson is now living w/me. I need to get some legal protection, (quardianship, custody or (?)), because abusive mother won't give me what is needed to put him in school (he's 16), etc. My deceased son is his father so he gets Social Security, so I need to transfer the money to me, now that I am caring for him. Mother did not use money for him but to support her brother and her drinking and drugs. He ran around anywhere he wanted and with whom he wanted and came home whenever he felt like it. That is just some of the details! The mother is a drunk and as soon as she realizes the SS money wont come to her she will do whatever she feels like, even lie to get him back. Right now she does not want him and told him so. I am a ill grandmother but I want him to have a chance! How do I get the info. I need to put him in school, get SS to stop paying the mother, and protection so that the mother won't manipulate the situation and play games with his emotions? Please help me!
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Grandson comes to live w/grandmother & needs legal protection from mother, etc.
- Thread Starter momstears
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Others here might be able to answer better - sorry for the delay. How long as your grandson been living with you? Where is the mother in relation to the place where you are? I don't know what state/country you are in so it's difficult to say at this point. Did the mother abandon the son? How did he come about living with you? Hope you are well and it's very good of you to try to provide for this child.
Proserpina
Moderator
(I didn't see this before today)
Grandparent, have you been in touch with child services? Your grandson's only legal parent seems to have abandoned him but is unwilling to do the right thing so you can get things in order; at this point it may require CPS to be involved.
Yes, they might remove him temporarily - but if you're fit and willing to take him (and his preference, at his age, will likely carry some weight) you can absolutely suggest yourself as an appropriate placement.
Also, if we know where you're located that might help us help you a bit further.
To: thelawprofessor
Thanks for yur reply! My grandson is now living w/me, and has been now for over 2 months! His mother lives in Grass Valley, CA. and has refused to take him back! The way he came to me was, by a emergency phone call from his mother stating that
I"I just can't take it any more" - (not new). She is a drunk and a dope smoker, (for many years now), and it has been a abusive environment for him. He is now going on 16 years old! My deceased son is his father, and despite my age, (71 yrs.), I feel in my heart that my son would want me to take control of the situation! Now he has a bed and a room of his own! I have recently had a surgery and any info.l you could give is appreciated. At this point, I have asked the mother for the appropriate legal papers and despite her stating that she will send them notorized, they never arrive! My grandson has been receiving Social Security ), death Benefits, (in mothers name), and she has asked me to keep the money coming to her, of course I refused! SS told me I can't do anything until legal papers are filed, etc. The only person I have in her area has recently gone on vacation, so now I am on my own!
How do I become his legal Guardian if she won't work w/me? Can't afford an Attorney, so I must handle on my own! Thank you in advance for any more info you can give!
signed, momstears
Thanks for yur reply! My grandson is now living w/me, and has been now for over 2 months! His mother lives in Grass Valley, CA. and has refused to take him back! The way he came to me was, by a emergency phone call from his mother stating that
I"I just can't take it any more" - (not new). She is a drunk and a dope smoker, (for many years now), and it has been a abusive environment for him. He is now going on 16 years old! My deceased son is his father, and despite my age, (71 yrs.), I feel in my heart that my son would want me to take control of the situation! Now he has a bed and a room of his own! I have recently had a surgery and any info.l you could give is appreciated. At this point, I have asked the mother for the appropriate legal papers and despite her stating that she will send them notorized, they never arrive! My grandson has been receiving Social Security ), death Benefits, (in mothers name), and she has asked me to keep the money coming to her, of course I refused! SS told me I can't do anything until legal papers are filed, etc. The only person I have in her area has recently gone on vacation, so now I am on my own!
How do I become his legal Guardian if she won't work w/me? Can't afford an Attorney, so I must handle on my own! Thank you in advance for any more info you can give!
signed, momstears
To: Proserpina:
Thank you for your reply! My grandson is now living w/me, (for 2 months). His mother is in Grass Valley, CA. Yes, I have spoken w/CPS and they state that I need to file legal papers for legal Guardianship, and until then, I can't really do anything! Without all the legal papers, and the mothers help I can't put him in high School, (15 yrs.), nor transfer his Social Security Death Benefits to my name! The mother has stated that she wants the money to remain in her name, I refused, but she won't cooperate w/me! I asked her to send the legal papers she has for him, she has not yet done so! In addition, she continues to call him drunk or high, w/stupid things to say! I want him to live here w/me but I do not want her causing problems for my grandson causing him stress! Yes the environment was abusive, but CPS is really no help and just tells me to file the appropriate papers for Guardianship. I am ill, (surgery), and need all the help I can get. The good news is my grandson is in a safe, secure, Christian home and he is getting much love and support from me, something he has not had w/his mother! I now wish that I did something a long time ago, but God is giving me the strength to take hold of the situation now!
Blessings,
momstears
P.S. Any more info is appreciated!
Thank you for your reply! My grandson is now living w/me, (for 2 months). His mother is in Grass Valley, CA. Yes, I have spoken w/CPS and they state that I need to file legal papers for legal Guardianship, and until then, I can't really do anything! Without all the legal papers, and the mothers help I can't put him in high School, (15 yrs.), nor transfer his Social Security Death Benefits to my name! The mother has stated that she wants the money to remain in her name, I refused, but she won't cooperate w/me! I asked her to send the legal papers she has for him, she has not yet done so! In addition, she continues to call him drunk or high, w/stupid things to say! I want him to live here w/me but I do not want her causing problems for my grandson causing him stress! Yes the environment was abusive, but CPS is really no help and just tells me to file the appropriate papers for Guardianship. I am ill, (surgery), and need all the help I can get. The good news is my grandson is in a safe, secure, Christian home and he is getting much love and support from me, something he has not had w/his mother! I now wish that I did something a long time ago, but God is giving me the strength to take hold of the situation now!
Blessings,
momstears
P.S. Any more info is appreciated!
army judge
Super Moderator
Regrettably, madam, I see no legal basis for you to gain guardianship without the mother's permission.
Even then, what you desire might not be possible.
I suggest you consult an attorney.
You might be heading downs path that you could regret.
You also must work with your hrs son's mother.
You might want to contact CPS.
I would speak to an attorney first.
Yes, it will be expensive.
So will criminal charges.
You might have put yourself in a position that brings you legal problems.
See a local lawyer, ASAP.
Or, get that child back to the person that is his legal guardian.
That appears NOT to be you.
Finally, please accept my condolences for the passing of your son.
Even then, what you desire might not be possible.
I suggest you consult an attorney.
You might be heading downs path that you could regret.
You also must work with your hrs son's mother.
You might want to contact CPS.
I would speak to an attorney first.
Yes, it will be expensive.
So will criminal charges.
You might have put yourself in a position that brings you legal problems.
See a local lawyer, ASAP.
Or, get that child back to the person that is his legal guardian.
That appears NOT to be you.
Finally, please accept my condolences for the passing of your son.
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