Hello,
I will try to keep this brief, I am a male in a relationship with a woman who has cheated on me multiple times. Our relationship is now on the rocks and I am simply trying to protect my child and my position in this stance. He is a 6 month old boy.
We are unmarried.
She smokes pot on a regular basis(daily multiple times) and her father is her dealer, step-father to be precise.
I drink from time to time however, can easily give it up, and only drink at home, beer not liquor. I make 3 times as much as her, as she is unwilling to work full time. I also am aware that I am an enabler or co-dependent in this situation as I have not forced her to stop smoking weed.
She also has Crohn's which is why she cannot drink. The last time she cheated I caught her before the act, tried to leave, she called me, I went home and gave her my stipulations.
Counseling, quit hanging out with bad influences, etc. After the first discussion within a week she has now changed her mind on hanging out with the bad influence person, and she does not want to go to counseling.
I feel as a male, that I am trapped. That I have no choice yet to either accept this woman who claims to love me still and still wants me to stay with her because I am providing a future in a good job and in school for a BS in Accounting. While at the same time she is not willing to do anything to change her ways except quit drinking which she says was the cause for both episodes of cheating.
Do I have any chance at a custody hearing, and if so what steps can I take, is my question?
I have asked her to sign what I believe is called an Infedility Contract/Clause/Moral Clause however I have read they do not hold up in court. She agreed to this though, because she believes and is so confident that if she is sober or stoned that she will not cheat and is willing to give up our mutual child in custody rights because of it.
However have read as I said they do not hold up in court.
Additionally I have her on tape/phone recording voice note of her admitting to cheating, meth use, and pot use. However I imagine even though its her voice, its inadmissable.
Do I have any options to get my son out of this situation?
Can I call the police right now and turn her in for pot smoking as there is nearly an ounce in our house and I am clean and do not smoke, or will I go to jail? If I do leave, this is the life my son is going to be brought up around as she has two other boys from a previous marriage, whom have no idea this has been going on since she was hospitalized for Crohns in January, and upon leaving took up pot smoking because she could not drink. She cheated on me in December prior to her hospital incident with the Crohns, and did a week ago because she decided to drink with a bad influence of a so-called friend.
I am not vengeful, I would love to work this out, however if she cannot meet me half way, I have never cheated and she will not stop...what am I supposed to do???
Thank you for any response.
United
I will try to keep this brief, I am a male in a relationship with a woman who has cheated on me multiple times. Our relationship is now on the rocks and I am simply trying to protect my child and my position in this stance. He is a 6 month old boy.
We are unmarried.
She smokes pot on a regular basis(daily multiple times) and her father is her dealer, step-father to be precise.
I drink from time to time however, can easily give it up, and only drink at home, beer not liquor. I make 3 times as much as her, as she is unwilling to work full time. I also am aware that I am an enabler or co-dependent in this situation as I have not forced her to stop smoking weed.
She also has Crohn's which is why she cannot drink. The last time she cheated I caught her before the act, tried to leave, she called me, I went home and gave her my stipulations.
Counseling, quit hanging out with bad influences, etc. After the first discussion within a week she has now changed her mind on hanging out with the bad influence person, and she does not want to go to counseling.
I feel as a male, that I am trapped. That I have no choice yet to either accept this woman who claims to love me still and still wants me to stay with her because I am providing a future in a good job and in school for a BS in Accounting. While at the same time she is not willing to do anything to change her ways except quit drinking which she says was the cause for both episodes of cheating.
Do I have any chance at a custody hearing, and if so what steps can I take, is my question?
I have asked her to sign what I believe is called an Infedility Contract/Clause/Moral Clause however I have read they do not hold up in court. She agreed to this though, because she believes and is so confident that if she is sober or stoned that she will not cheat and is willing to give up our mutual child in custody rights because of it.
However have read as I said they do not hold up in court.
Additionally I have her on tape/phone recording voice note of her admitting to cheating, meth use, and pot use. However I imagine even though its her voice, its inadmissable.
Do I have any options to get my son out of this situation?
Can I call the police right now and turn her in for pot smoking as there is nearly an ounce in our house and I am clean and do not smoke, or will I go to jail? If I do leave, this is the life my son is going to be brought up around as she has two other boys from a previous marriage, whom have no idea this has been going on since she was hospitalized for Crohns in January, and upon leaving took up pot smoking because she could not drink. She cheated on me in December prior to her hospital incident with the Crohns, and did a week ago because she decided to drink with a bad influence of a so-called friend.
I am not vengeful, I would love to work this out, however if she cannot meet me half way, I have never cheated and she will not stop...what am I supposed to do???
Thank you for any response.
United
