hereisbauer
New Member
Okay well this is a really long story, and I thank you in advance for taking the time to read this.
Well, when I was 15 and a freshman in high school, I met an 18 year old senior at school. We started dating, and then after about 6 or 7 months my parents found out we had sex, and pressed charges. Justin (my boyfriend) was charged with 3rd degree criminal sexual conduct. Since he was a good kid going into the military and had a clean record prior to this, they only told him to not contact me until his sentencing trial.
Even though I'm young, I was absolutely crazy about this boy. We did everything together, and we told eachother everything. For the first time in my life, I was actually happy, and trusted someone. He was not only my boyfriend, but my best friend. I was never able to say that I'd do anything for a person before, but I would honestly do anything for Justin.
So we kept in contact online, through friends, and he even went as far as buying me a prepaid cell phone that we could contact through. My dad somehow found the cell phone, and took it to the prosecutor. The judge put Justin in the county jail for 2 weeks. Once again, as in love as he was with me, he just couldn't help himself, and he needed to talk to me. He called me from jail everyday for about a week, thinking that he was allowed to contact me since he was in jail anyways. My dad found out about that too, and gave the phone records to the prosecutor as proof. Justin then ended up getting more time in the county jail, and had to stay there for 2 months.
Once he got out, he called my best friend and had her 3-way call me so he could talk to me. I know all of this disobeying the judge business sounds stupid and absolutely crazy, but it just goes to show how much we loved and cared about eachother. We just couldn't help ourselves. Well the 3-way calling continued for about a month before my dad figured that out. He claims he was suspicious because I was "happy" and "non-depressed".
Well after we got caught with that, his sentencing trial came along, and the judge was not happy. So on May 10th, 2007 Justin was sentenced with 3 years probation, with the first year spent in the county jail. His probation states that he is not allowed within 50 feet of my house, and no contact with me or anyone under the age of 17. I am now 16 years old, going on 17 in March. This means that when he gets out of jail around May 2008, I will be about 17 and 2 months. This means he STILL won't be allowed to contact me for even 2 more years after that! That will make me just a little over 19 years old! Am I the only one who finds this a little ridiculous? Once he gets out of jail and I'm over 17 years old, I think it's reasonable to allow us to talk to eachother. I'll be well over the age of consent in Michigan, and over the age group he isn't allowed to contact. He would have already done his time and had been greatly punished. And if contact when I'm 17 is pushing it, then at least 18! I'll be a legal adult! I think by then I should have the right to choose whom I want to date and/or talk to whomever I wish.
It's been almost 7 months now since he's been in jail and since I've had any contact with him at all, and my life has been complete hell since. I'm depressed all the time and I cry almost all day, every single day and night. I've tried moving on and getting my life back on track numerous times, but nothing has worked. Time is only making the pain stronger. I've even tried dating a couple different guys. I even dated one for 4 months. We eventually broke up just because I was sick of lying to myself and forcing myself to move on when my heart was still with Justin. I then thought maybe I should just forget about dating and relationships and just focus on school and work. That didn't work either. I'm now halfway through my junior year, and when I first started dating Justin my freshman year, I used to be an A and B student. I'm now failing 2 classes and the rest are D's and C's. I've been seeing a therapist through this whole process by my choice, not my parents'. I even went out of my way to seek out help from my school counselor since my parents refuse to talk about it with me. I've even tried switching schools to get away from the school that haunts me with memories of him. That only made things worse and so I ended up switching back.
I just don't know what to do with myself anymore. I'm a complete mess. I've had thoughts about running away and suicide, although I'd never follow through with either of them. Alls I know is that I cannot even go another 3 months like this, let alone 2 and a half years! I don't see how it's a crime for 2 people to be in love. Yeah, we made a mistake and I'm mature enough to admit that, and trust me..we've both paid for it enough. But our relationship never was based around sex at all! We went to the same school together! We ate lunch together and even shared a class together! There's absolutely no way I can continue living this way. I'll have the biggest breakdown very soon, if I haven't already. I can feel it coming.
Everything I've just typed isn't even the half of what I'm feeling right now. PLEASE, PLEASE someone tell me there's something I can do. I'll do anything. Thank you so much for your time, and for reading all of this. It's GREATLY appreciated! <3
Well, when I was 15 and a freshman in high school, I met an 18 year old senior at school. We started dating, and then after about 6 or 7 months my parents found out we had sex, and pressed charges. Justin (my boyfriend) was charged with 3rd degree criminal sexual conduct. Since he was a good kid going into the military and had a clean record prior to this, they only told him to not contact me until his sentencing trial.
Even though I'm young, I was absolutely crazy about this boy. We did everything together, and we told eachother everything. For the first time in my life, I was actually happy, and trusted someone. He was not only my boyfriend, but my best friend. I was never able to say that I'd do anything for a person before, but I would honestly do anything for Justin.
So we kept in contact online, through friends, and he even went as far as buying me a prepaid cell phone that we could contact through. My dad somehow found the cell phone, and took it to the prosecutor. The judge put Justin in the county jail for 2 weeks. Once again, as in love as he was with me, he just couldn't help himself, and he needed to talk to me. He called me from jail everyday for about a week, thinking that he was allowed to contact me since he was in jail anyways. My dad found out about that too, and gave the phone records to the prosecutor as proof. Justin then ended up getting more time in the county jail, and had to stay there for 2 months.
Once he got out, he called my best friend and had her 3-way call me so he could talk to me. I know all of this disobeying the judge business sounds stupid and absolutely crazy, but it just goes to show how much we loved and cared about eachother. We just couldn't help ourselves. Well the 3-way calling continued for about a month before my dad figured that out. He claims he was suspicious because I was "happy" and "non-depressed".
Well after we got caught with that, his sentencing trial came along, and the judge was not happy. So on May 10th, 2007 Justin was sentenced with 3 years probation, with the first year spent in the county jail. His probation states that he is not allowed within 50 feet of my house, and no contact with me or anyone under the age of 17. I am now 16 years old, going on 17 in March. This means that when he gets out of jail around May 2008, I will be about 17 and 2 months. This means he STILL won't be allowed to contact me for even 2 more years after that! That will make me just a little over 19 years old! Am I the only one who finds this a little ridiculous? Once he gets out of jail and I'm over 17 years old, I think it's reasonable to allow us to talk to eachother. I'll be well over the age of consent in Michigan, and over the age group he isn't allowed to contact. He would have already done his time and had been greatly punished. And if contact when I'm 17 is pushing it, then at least 18! I'll be a legal adult! I think by then I should have the right to choose whom I want to date and/or talk to whomever I wish.
It's been almost 7 months now since he's been in jail and since I've had any contact with him at all, and my life has been complete hell since. I'm depressed all the time and I cry almost all day, every single day and night. I've tried moving on and getting my life back on track numerous times, but nothing has worked. Time is only making the pain stronger. I've even tried dating a couple different guys. I even dated one for 4 months. We eventually broke up just because I was sick of lying to myself and forcing myself to move on when my heart was still with Justin. I then thought maybe I should just forget about dating and relationships and just focus on school and work. That didn't work either. I'm now halfway through my junior year, and when I first started dating Justin my freshman year, I used to be an A and B student. I'm now failing 2 classes and the rest are D's and C's. I've been seeing a therapist through this whole process by my choice, not my parents'. I even went out of my way to seek out help from my school counselor since my parents refuse to talk about it with me. I've even tried switching schools to get away from the school that haunts me with memories of him. That only made things worse and so I ended up switching back.
I just don't know what to do with myself anymore. I'm a complete mess. I've had thoughts about running away and suicide, although I'd never follow through with either of them. Alls I know is that I cannot even go another 3 months like this, let alone 2 and a half years! I don't see how it's a crime for 2 people to be in love. Yeah, we made a mistake and I'm mature enough to admit that, and trust me..we've both paid for it enough. But our relationship never was based around sex at all! We went to the same school together! We ate lunch together and even shared a class together! There's absolutely no way I can continue living this way. I'll have the biggest breakdown very soon, if I haven't already. I can feel it coming.
Everything I've just typed isn't even the half of what I'm feeling right now. PLEASE, PLEASE someone tell me there's something I can do. I'll do anything. Thank you so much for your time, and for reading all of this. It's GREATLY appreciated! <3
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