am just depressed not suicidal

[suicidalmom]

my ex got full custody because he convinced the judge i was suicidal and an alcoholic drug user even aftr the fact that i tested negative for a voluntary urine test and previously i had full custody was getting childsupport but gave it up so he can see our son as he had refused to see his son as long as a penny from his check was coming to me. I know i should have left myself at full custody but i felt sorry for my son and now he is being raised by a man that leaves him at a baby sitter 16hrs daily and refuses to have our son see me or stay with me - his mother while he is at work. I currenly dont have a job and living with a friend how can i get my son back? i am bythe way soon to start working and have a safe place myson can stay but its like the court didnt even here me or look at previous court records feel like it wasnt fair

 

[WhirledPeas]

We don't know the whole story, but it sounds like your ex doesn't trust you to be safe around your son. Have you talked with your ex about what he would need to see to be able to reestablish that trust? Most ex's don't mean to be vindictive when they restrict access based on allegations of drug abuse or mental health issues, they mean to protect the child. It may be that he needs to have an ongoing dialog with you and to see you're living well, taking care of yourself, moving forward with your issues, etc. When he is reassured, start talking with him about more parenting time while he is at work.

If he won't cooperate with you even though you're making good progress in getting your life together, consider going back to court in the future to ask for "right of first refusal" or the right to care for the child while the custodial parent isn't available. The court will want to see the same things, good job, safe home, ongoing counseling if needed, etc.