Accused shoplifter, security always radioing and following me

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WrongAccusation

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I'm 20 year old college student. This scenario has been occuring for 2 months now. It stresses me out big time. I am innocent, I know that if they sue me they will not have any evidence of me taking their stuff.


Please help. I want to clear out my name and this terrible misunderstanding.


Cause:
Since Im broke, and wait for my mom to finnish her work (till 8PM, I wait for my mom since the apparent increase of rape victims in our town), I always just kill time by looking what interesting to buy from shops. I lurk around but ended up not buying anything. I really wanted to buy something so I ended up being inside the shop for 30-1hr w/o purchasing anything. I also often check out the bag that I have (messenger bag) bec it has a broken zipper. I only check it when there are people near me. I have done this for 2 months, probably 6 times for the whole 2 months? That's it.


Maybe that cued them for me as being a suspiscious person. But they do not have a proof! :( And they look at me as a criminal, they radio me when they see me, like passing reports. The whooooole employee and "disguised" security are always, and obviously have eyes on me. When I stop to check items, they observe me from a distance (5 men, 3 guards, 3 cleaners, and some saleslady+more). I was their customer for years, so the high-alert change of treatment is obvious, and it became more worse every time I visit.



What steps can I do to clear out my name? I'm worried that they'll say that those were just excuses, and they'll win. I also don't want any lf my family member to be involved, or even know this.


Should I contact them first and not have a formal message about the misunderstanding, or should I be extremely prepared with a someone knowldgeable about law to accompany me when I approach them?


Have they violated any of my rights of which I can sue them? Or that's a bad idea? I just want to clear out my name, but if my face is scattered and labeled as something I'm not, then I want to sue them.


How could I also know if there are pictures of me scattered as "shop lifters" or anything similar. Because everywhere I go, same situation, so I thought that there must be some database to alert other companies (?)



Please help me clear out my name and which proper steps to take or consider, and how they might counterattack so I can be prepared. This is the first time I've been involved to an accusation, so I have no idea on what to do. Innocent but accused for a crime.
 
I am a Retail theft consultant and answer questions like yours daily. Your name has not been tarnished as no action has been taken against you nor made public. Your actions set off "Red Flags" that make you look suspicious. The only way for this to stop is for you to not return to store or return so often not buying anything. You have no cause for action and the store is reacting in a normal fashion based on your post
 
WrongAccusation said:
I always just kill time by looking what interesting to buy from shops. I lurk around but ended up not buying anything. I really wanted to buy something so I ended up being inside the shop for 30-1hr w/o purchasing anything. I also often check out the bag that I have (messenger bag) bec it has a broken zipper. I only check it when there are people near me. I have done this for 2 months, probably 6 times for the whole 2 months?
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That's how shoplifter's act. If you act like a criminal (even if you aren't) you'll be treated like a criminal.

Nobody's doing anything wrong to you.

You're the one causing the problem for yourself.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
 
I can't approach them to clear out my name? Because not appearing makes it look like that I'm guilty, which I'm not. I'm really a social awkward... I hope that I can speak to them to clear this out, is there anyway do talk to them about this matter instead? Or will there be a possibility for them to win on the accusation, and make my suspicious movements as there evidence?


I'm innocent. I can't stop going from those stores, since our town is small and those were just the stores we can go to. No one else also know that this is happening, so we always go together to buy our stuff.


I hope to hear other options, preferably directly clearing out my name. How can I also clear out my name? (Can I just come to store and talk to someone / email them regarding concern / have someone knowlegeable in law to accompany me when I'll approach them)


This happens in more than one store. Thanks, I hope to hear from you soon.
 
All I can suggest is that you go into the store, ask for the store manager or owner, explain your situation, and see how that works out. Maybe, it'll work out once they know you by name and know why you are there.
 
You can go to the store(s) & explain the situation & see what they say. However, they "might" still keep a watch on you since this activity of yours is suspicious.
 
Which will be better, to be accompanied by someone knowledgeable or should I go there casually and talk to someone? And what should I expect when I approach them? Will I be locked to an office? And which rights will be potentially violated, or to what extent is too much when they will interrogate me?


I'm planning to do this immediately. Hope you'll guide me. Thanks for the help
 
Maybe you should stop shopping there.... If you approach them at that point they might just have you arrested. There is a reason why they are watching you. Either they seen you steal something or they have you on video. They are just waiting for you to do it again. Then they have you with the goods as well. I would stay out of the store.
 
Once again your name is not tarnished and they have every right to be concerned base don your actions. Talking to them might give them even more cause to watch you. There is nothing you can do or say that will force them to stop watching you as you are setting off red flags by your actions. Sometimes this happens. Your options are to shop elsewhere or maybe buy something once in a while
 
Stay out of those stores and find something else to do while you are waiting on your parent. Maybe read a book or something.

If they haven't stopped you and asked your name, then your name cannot be tarnished.
 
Based on what you posted, your name should not be tarnished at this time. However; if I were you, I would quit going to those stores. Your decision.
 
You are wandering around these stores for hours, looking at merchandise, checking your bag often, and never buying anything. That is pretty much the definition of suspicious behavior. The only thing worse would be to go up to them and announce you aren't a shoplifter. Stores exist for people to buy things. Sure, at times people window shop or check out the prices and decide not to buy, but not daily and not while carrying a large bag they keep fiddling with. Leave the bag with your Mom and find a nice coffee shop or library to read while waiting. Visit a friend. Wait for Mom at home. Or, accept the fact that if you keep acting the way a shoplifter or suspicious person would act, the store employees will keep an eye to make sure that you remain an innocent and aimless wanderer.
 
Is my name or my identity not really tarnished? I swear, every main store acts toward me in that way. Security guard, employees, and "acting civilians", all of them are obviously watching me. Because they will stand at a distance, like a imperfect circle position, wherein they casually face at my direction. Or casually be in the same aisle as I do. It really stresses and pisses me out so much. Like my every move is their business. I want to go on stores in peace. I badly want to end it, and just clear out this misunderstanding. So my only option is not to go on those stores? I can't. This is a small town, and that's the only places where I can buy my needs. Like I'll be living here in a very long time to avoid those stores. I'm a pitiful social awkward mess, I can't undo my awkwardness that resulted to this misunderstanding.


I simply can't avoid these stores. But is this really the only option?????? Like "running away"
 
WrongAccusation said:
Is my name or my identity not really tarnished? I swear, every main store acts toward me in that way. Security guard, employees, and "acting civilians", all of them are obviously watching me. Because they will stand at a distance, like a imperfect circle position, wherein they casually face at my direction. Or casually be in the same aisle as I do. It really stresses and pisses me out so much. Like my every move is their business. I want to go on stores in peace. I badly want to end it, and just clear out this misunderstanding. So my only option is not to go on those stores? I can't. This is a small town, and that's the only places where I can buy my needs. Like I'll be living here in a very long time to avoid those stores. I'm a pitiful social awkward mess, I can't undo my awkwardness that resulted to this misunderstanding.


I simply can't avoid these stores. But is this really the only option?????? Like "running away"
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We reap that which we sow.

When bitter seeds are sown, the plant bears bitter fruit.
 
If the LP are watching you then your actions, dress or something have set off a red flag with them. If your doing nothing wrong ignore them and continue with shopping. LP I train are taught to look for certain things, actions etc if a customer meets any of these red flags the LP should watch the subject until they are confident the subject means no ill content. I myself have shopped in stores where the LP do not know me and for whatever reason they hang around my area watching me. I ignore it as they are only doing their job and I must have done something to concern them.
 
There really isn't much you can do except try to ignore them - just be sure you do not do anything wrong. Your other option is not to go in the stores though you seem to want/need to.
 

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