Hi all,
First off I live in the State of Washington.
I'm 16, male, and live with my Mother.
The case with her isn't physical abuse, drug abuse, or any of the more drastic situations, but there is indeed a situation.
Now, I understand the fact that all teenagers have issues with their parents, and in my personal opinion as well as those of work colleges, friends, and family, I can handle stressful and high tensity situations with ease, but this situation with my mom that's been growing over the past year is becoming unbearable.
She has several psychological issues, those of which include Brain Seizures and MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder), along with the physical ailments of Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia.
I've had to take care of her countless times and in some ways end up being the parent for a certain amount of time, even years back when I was a pre-adolescent.
I doubt that anyone would quite be able to grasp the situation unless they knew anything about MPD, which not many people do.. in fact a lot of people don't even believe in it, from what I understand.
For those who do know anything about it, she has multiple splits.. 16 if I can remember right. They range from about 3 years old to mid 20s, perhaps 30s, I can't quite remember.
But there is a noticeable difference when she has switched, which sometimes leaves me with a human being incapable of making wise decisions, or even any decision at all at times.
Anyway, it got to the point to where I had several panic attacks within a few days, so I spoke with my doctor earlier this year and began taking Anti Depressants to help me cope with stress and anxiety, and help ward off depression and suicide, etc.
They ended up screwing me up even more than before I began taking them, which was disappointing to say the least.
I ended up contacting my girlfriends Mother a little over a month ago, and begged her to come and pick me up so that I could stay with them for a while so that I could calm down and get away from my mother for at least a few days.
I left a note for my mom and told her where I was at, and told her that I would call her in the morning and that I just needed to get away for a few days so that I could calm down and think about some things.
My girlfriends mother did end up coming to pick me up, around 2AM.
My mom called the next morning at around 8AM and demanded that I be back home before 9 or she would call the police on my girlfriends family. (My girlfriend lives about 45 minutes away from me.)
About an hour after I walked in the door and had a brief, somewhat hostile word with my mother, two men from a religious organization that I had worked with on and off (helping with various technical components, etc), showed up, and came into my bedroom and would not leave without me. I ended up grabbing my duffel bag and walking back out the door with them. (This was after being up for about 50+ hours, by the way)
Long story short, I ended up staying with various people within the organization for about 2 weeks, then snuck out of the house I was staying at one night after I could no longer bear the constant daily preaching that I was receiving, and walked 10 miles to get home.
The next day went decently enough, my mother wasn't exactly opposed to me being home.. until that night, when she came in as I was trying to go to sleep and began fiddling with my CD player, and then asked for my house keys. That launched us into an argument about me wanting to live there, and in short she wound up calling the owner of the aforementioned religious organization, who told her that if I would not submit, and if I didn't want to be there, that she should call the police on me. 45 minutes later, I was having a pleasant discussion with an officer in my bedroom, who clearly noted that there was no problem except for the fact that I didn't want to be living at home. Him and his partner tried to see if they could get me into a community bed for the night, but unfortunately they were all full up, so they told my mom to leave me alone for the night and to try to work things out in the morning.
That was about 2-3 weeks ago.
I've been job hunting for the past month, and haven't had much luck so far.. The few opportunities that I have had have been canceled out by the fact that my mother does not want me to have my license, though her only excuse for not letting me get it is because I have "Road Rage".
Now would be a good time to also add that she is a very controlling, and manipulating person. Her saying that I have road rage is fair, but not fair enough to keep me from a license. Last year at the age of 15, when I got my permit, I was quite anxious and easily disrupted by other drivers.. but over the past 6 months I do believe the worst offense I can be accused of is flipping someone off once, and muttering under my breath.
Road rage? Perhaps mild, yes. But nothing endangering of other drivers.
Anyway, quite basically the position I am in now, is one of being utterly stuck. I've searched many forums and sites about the process of Emancipation, and even talked to the above mentioned law officer about the subject, and I understand that quite frankly, there's no way I could get emancipated. (Unless, according to the law officer, I had a substantial amount of money in a bank account. Substantial as in $100,000 or so.)
I wouldn't mind sticking out the next two years if it wasn't for the fact that my mother is now being absolutely illogical in her decisions. She's trying to take control of possessions that I have paid for, that I own, and dictate what happens with them and when, etc etc.
I apologize for being so long winded, but, I just have absolutely no idea what to do.
I don't want to go back on anti-depressants, the only family that I have that might help me is down in California, but I'm not willing to be apart from my Fiancee for 2 years to go live in California, with a family that wouldn't be much better than the one I'm in now.
My Uncle that lives in the area has made it clear that he wants no involvement, though he pities me because even he himself can't stand to be around my mother for more than a day before becoming steamed.
It'd be easier if she actually went to work, or if I went to school, but all she does all day is sit around on her computer, or watch TV, or garden. Now I know she has physical issues, but.. well, come on.
On the other hand I'm homeschooled, and that basically leaves me stuck in the house all day every day. I don't live in an area where there's really anything to do, and I don't have the money to go any place or do anything..
I sincerely apologize for being so long winded, quite honestly most of that was probably venting.. and this is probably the completely wrong place to post this, but is there anything, anything at all that I can do, legally?
Or just in general?
If you actually read all that then thank you so much for your time and understanding, I apologize again for being so long winded but I'm quite nearing the end of my rope. I'm doing my best to fight of depression, but it's becoming a real battle.
Any help is appreciated.
Thank you again,
Jay
First off I live in the State of Washington.
I'm 16, male, and live with my Mother.
The case with her isn't physical abuse, drug abuse, or any of the more drastic situations, but there is indeed a situation.
Now, I understand the fact that all teenagers have issues with their parents, and in my personal opinion as well as those of work colleges, friends, and family, I can handle stressful and high tensity situations with ease, but this situation with my mom that's been growing over the past year is becoming unbearable.
She has several psychological issues, those of which include Brain Seizures and MPD (Multiple Personality Disorder), along with the physical ailments of Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia.
I've had to take care of her countless times and in some ways end up being the parent for a certain amount of time, even years back when I was a pre-adolescent.
I doubt that anyone would quite be able to grasp the situation unless they knew anything about MPD, which not many people do.. in fact a lot of people don't even believe in it, from what I understand.
For those who do know anything about it, she has multiple splits.. 16 if I can remember right. They range from about 3 years old to mid 20s, perhaps 30s, I can't quite remember.
But there is a noticeable difference when she has switched, which sometimes leaves me with a human being incapable of making wise decisions, or even any decision at all at times.
Anyway, it got to the point to where I had several panic attacks within a few days, so I spoke with my doctor earlier this year and began taking Anti Depressants to help me cope with stress and anxiety, and help ward off depression and suicide, etc.
They ended up screwing me up even more than before I began taking them, which was disappointing to say the least.
I ended up contacting my girlfriends Mother a little over a month ago, and begged her to come and pick me up so that I could stay with them for a while so that I could calm down and get away from my mother for at least a few days.
I left a note for my mom and told her where I was at, and told her that I would call her in the morning and that I just needed to get away for a few days so that I could calm down and think about some things.
My girlfriends mother did end up coming to pick me up, around 2AM.
My mom called the next morning at around 8AM and demanded that I be back home before 9 or she would call the police on my girlfriends family. (My girlfriend lives about 45 minutes away from me.)
About an hour after I walked in the door and had a brief, somewhat hostile word with my mother, two men from a religious organization that I had worked with on and off (helping with various technical components, etc), showed up, and came into my bedroom and would not leave without me. I ended up grabbing my duffel bag and walking back out the door with them. (This was after being up for about 50+ hours, by the way)
Long story short, I ended up staying with various people within the organization for about 2 weeks, then snuck out of the house I was staying at one night after I could no longer bear the constant daily preaching that I was receiving, and walked 10 miles to get home.
The next day went decently enough, my mother wasn't exactly opposed to me being home.. until that night, when she came in as I was trying to go to sleep and began fiddling with my CD player, and then asked for my house keys. That launched us into an argument about me wanting to live there, and in short she wound up calling the owner of the aforementioned religious organization, who told her that if I would not submit, and if I didn't want to be there, that she should call the police on me. 45 minutes later, I was having a pleasant discussion with an officer in my bedroom, who clearly noted that there was no problem except for the fact that I didn't want to be living at home. Him and his partner tried to see if they could get me into a community bed for the night, but unfortunately they were all full up, so they told my mom to leave me alone for the night and to try to work things out in the morning.
That was about 2-3 weeks ago.
I've been job hunting for the past month, and haven't had much luck so far.. The few opportunities that I have had have been canceled out by the fact that my mother does not want me to have my license, though her only excuse for not letting me get it is because I have "Road Rage".
Now would be a good time to also add that she is a very controlling, and manipulating person. Her saying that I have road rage is fair, but not fair enough to keep me from a license. Last year at the age of 15, when I got my permit, I was quite anxious and easily disrupted by other drivers.. but over the past 6 months I do believe the worst offense I can be accused of is flipping someone off once, and muttering under my breath.
Road rage? Perhaps mild, yes. But nothing endangering of other drivers.
Anyway, quite basically the position I am in now, is one of being utterly stuck. I've searched many forums and sites about the process of Emancipation, and even talked to the above mentioned law officer about the subject, and I understand that quite frankly, there's no way I could get emancipated. (Unless, according to the law officer, I had a substantial amount of money in a bank account. Substantial as in $100,000 or so.)
I wouldn't mind sticking out the next two years if it wasn't for the fact that my mother is now being absolutely illogical in her decisions. She's trying to take control of possessions that I have paid for, that I own, and dictate what happens with them and when, etc etc.
I apologize for being so long winded, but, I just have absolutely no idea what to do.
I don't want to go back on anti-depressants, the only family that I have that might help me is down in California, but I'm not willing to be apart from my Fiancee for 2 years to go live in California, with a family that wouldn't be much better than the one I'm in now.
My Uncle that lives in the area has made it clear that he wants no involvement, though he pities me because even he himself can't stand to be around my mother for more than a day before becoming steamed.
It'd be easier if she actually went to work, or if I went to school, but all she does all day is sit around on her computer, or watch TV, or garden. Now I know she has physical issues, but.. well, come on.
On the other hand I'm homeschooled, and that basically leaves me stuck in the house all day every day. I don't live in an area where there's really anything to do, and I don't have the money to go any place or do anything..
I sincerely apologize for being so long winded, quite honestly most of that was probably venting.. and this is probably the completely wrong place to post this, but is there anything, anything at all that I can do, legally?
Or just in general?
If you actually read all that then thank you so much for your time and understanding, I apologize again for being so long winded but I'm quite nearing the end of my rope. I'm doing my best to fight of depression, but it's becoming a real battle.
Any help is appreciated.
Thank you again,
Jay
