When does custody time begin?

I made an appointment for two of our children at 3 pm and 3:15 pm on a Friday. It happens to be Mother's Day weekend and I am their mother. The order states: ""The minor children shall always be with the honored parent beginning the Friday before the holiday at the recess of school (or 6 pm if school is not in session) and ending at the return of school on Monday (or 9 am if school is not in session." The children get out of school at 3:10 pm. My ex-husband is claiming that I scheduled the appointments during his custody time. I would need to have the children be dismissed about 2:30 pm to make their appointments, so they would have early dismissal. So, technically, which of us is correct - me or my ex-husband?

Your ex-husband is correct. School lets out at 3:10 PM.

You should have made the appointments with enough time after 3:10 PM to be able to pick up the children for whatever.

Mother's Day is a Sunday. It has nothing to do with whatever you planned for Friday.

And with 3 months to go you have plenty of time to change the appointments.

Give up, MommaG, you're not going to win this.

adjusterjack said:

Your ex-husband is correct. School lets out at 3:10 PM.

You should have made the appointments with enough time after 3:10 PM to be able to pick up the children for whatever.

Mother's Day is a Sunday. It has nothing to do with whatever you planned for Friday.

And with 3 months to go you have plenty of time to change the appointments.

Give up, MommaG, you're not going to win this.

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I understand and thank you for your response. Per the order, due to the holiday, I get the children at the recess of school on that Friday. I don't read that as, the milli-second that school concludes after the last class of the day or after the final bell. I also wouldn't take them out of school early if there were other options. The appointment is for a routine medication review that occurs every 3 months for the children - which he never schedules or attends himself. I feel it is silly for me to cancel and reschedule routine appointments for teenagers over a 40-minute time difference, during which he wouldn't see the children or be with them anyways. (Nor will it affect their grades as they do very well in school.) However, because he will argue semantics over 40 minutes that he wouldn't have been with the children anyways for a routine medication review, I will cancel and reschedule the appointments. It isn't worth it to argue with a narcissist over 40 minutes of time that would be for the benefit of our children for a routine appointment. Thank you for your assistance.

MommaG said:

Per the order, due to the holiday, I get the children at the recess of school on that Friday. I don't read that as, the milli-second that school concludes after the last class of the day or after the final bell.

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That's how you should read it because that is the reality. The school day does end at the end of the last class of the day or after the final bell.

Your ex could very well be a narcissist or maybe that's just you being hostile and accusatory. He's doing nothing wrong by insisting you follow the court order. I'm sure that you would complain vociferously if he strayed from the court order even a little bit.

@MommaG - are you saying that dad is mad that you're getting the kids at 2:30 so that you can get them to a medical appointment instead of 3:10 when school lets out?

MommaG said:

The order states: ""The minor children shall always be with the honored parent beginning the Friday before the holiday at the recess of school (or 6 pm if school is not in session) and ending at the return of school on Monday (or 9 am if school is not in session." The children get out of school at 3:10 pm.

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This is as clear as a bell. Your custodial time begins at 3:10 p.m.

MommaG said:

I don't read that as, the milli-second that school concludes after the last class of the day or after the final bell.

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Then it makes no sense for you to have asked, "technically, which of us is correct[?]"

MommaG said:

I will cancel and reschedule the appointments. It isn't worth it to argue

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Given that May is three months away, this is what should have been done anyway.

That said, since the kids obviously aren't with their other parent prior to 3:10, if I were a judge and their father made a big stink over this, I'd be awfully pissed at him for being a dick over something that doesn't impact him in the slightest.

Not the Dad making a stink. Appointments should have been made for later in the afternoon in the first place.

adjusterjack said:

Not the Dad making a stink.

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That's why I wrote, "if . . . their father made a big stink over this." So far, all we know is that the father "is claiming that I scheduled the appointments during his custody time." Not only do we not know exactly what that means, we don't know what the father has done or intends to do, if anything, if the OP doesn't re-schedule the appointments.

adjusterjack said:

Appointments should have been made for later in the afternoon in the first place.

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Perhaps. If the father cared about his children's well-being, he wouldn't care about this scheduling issue.

Taking the kids out of school before classes are over - I think that's worth caring about.

Besides, I always take these stories about horrible exes with a grain of salt, no matter which side it's coming from.