My 17 year old friend's mother is abusive and cops wont do anything.

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Andrewmonroe289

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Georgia
My friend's mother is an emotionally abusive drug user who has threatened to harm her child multiple times. Earlier today, she had gotten into an argument with her mom that resulted in her mom trying to hit her with her car. My friend called the police and called me right after, so I heard the entire conversation with the police. The chief of police in our local area was sent. My friend told the police that there were drugs in the house, that her mom has threatened to kill her recently by speeding on the highway saying "I'm going to kill us both," and that her mom has chased her boyfriend with a knife threatening to kill him. Her mom told the cops "My daughter is just throwing a tantrum because she doesn't want to do what I say." The cops believed her and did nothing but tell my friend to go stay at someone else's house for tonight. This is not the first time the police have been called to the house over something like this, and even neighbors and friends have vouched for her that her mom is not fit to be a parent, but the cops have done nothing. What can I do? I have witnessed her mother smoking weed in her house and while driving with me and my friend in the car, and I have witnessed my friend's mom have mental breakdowns that result in her crying and screaming for seemingly no reason. I believe that she has some type of mental illness. What can I do to get my friend out of that house? If it helps, my friend's grandmother is willing to let her stay with her, but her mom won't allow it.
 
My friend's mother is an emotionally abusive drug user who has threatened to harm her child multiple times. Earlier today, she had gotten into an argument with her mom that resulted in her mom trying to hit her with her car. My friend called the police and called me right after, so I heard the entire conversation with the police. The chief of police in our local area was sent. My friend told the police that there were drugs in the house, that her mom has threatened to kill her recently by speeding on the highway saying "I'm going to kill us both," and that her mom has chased her boyfriend with a knife threatening to kill him. Her mom told the cops "My daughter is just throwing a tantrum because she doesn't want to do what I say." The cops believed her and did nothing but tell my friend to go stay at someone else's house for tonight. This is not the first time the police have been called to the house over something like this, and even neighbors and friends have vouched for her that her mom is not fit to be a parent, but the cops have done nothing. What can I do? I have witnessed her mother smoking weed in her house and while driving with me and my friend in the car, and I have witnessed my friend's mom have mental breakdowns that result in her crying and screaming for seemingly no reason. I believe that she has some type of mental illness. What can I do to get my friend out of that house? If it helps, my friend's grandmother is willing to let her stay with her, but her mom won't allow it.
Where is your friends father?
 
Let's be quite clear about this.

The one and only thing you can do is call Child Protective Services. The matter will at that point be in their hands and their hands only. There is NO other action you can take.

You cannot force the police to act and you cannot make CPS do what you want and you cannot bring your friend to live at your house unless her mother says she may. (And even then, if Mom changes her mind, back home she goes.)

You can call CPS, and that is all.
 
If your friend wants to get away from her mother, she needs to contact CPS. The question is, does she have some place to go that is safe, and that also has a responsible adult present that can provide her with a safe place to stay for what could be and extended period of time? If the father is still involved (even if only by child support orders or parental rights) you may run into obstacles with him. However, your friend, being 17, may be able to apply for legal emancipation if she is able to show that she can be financially responsible for herself (i.e. job, housing, vehicle etc). Also, I'm not sure how old you are, but if you want to help your friend, it would be more beneficial for either your friend, or your parents (if they are aware of the situation) to contact the authorities. However, before you do that, you must first be sure that your friend has somewhere safe to go if she is removed from the home. You do not want your friend being removed and placed in temporary foster care situation, as I can tell you from experience, it only serves to make it that much more traumatic for her. More importantly, if that happens and for some reason she is placed back into mothers care down the road, you're looking at a potentially worse threat to her safety, as domestic violence situations are often like hornets nests that do not like to be poked. I applaud you for reaching out to help her though. I agree that (you) should not personally inject yourself in this situation, as you have no clout or authority to do anything outside of this to really help her. However, if your parents or a member of her family become aware and would like to help this poor girl, I encourage you to find other advocates that can provide real help and resources that only legal adults really can to victims of DV like your friend.
This thread is over a year old and the original poster hasn't been back since they started this thread. Please don't dig up dead threads.

ETA: The child in question is an adult now.
 
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