Take US baby to Germany

[Sandradiana]

I am a German citizen who has lived in the US, NYC for the past 17 years (green card holder). My boyfriend (US citizen, TX resident) and I are expecting our first child, however, the relationship may not survive this pregnancy.

I am planning on giving birth in NYC, the father will sign the birth certificate, however I am worried about him being able to prevent me from leaving the country to move back to Germany. Being a single mother would force me to go back (somewhat against my wishes) since I will need the support of my family in Germany. He has said that he would not do that, but I don't trust it and would like something in writing BEFORE the baby is born.

My questions are as follows:

1. What are his legal rights in terms of preventing me from leaving the country?
2. Would a document written up by us (or lawyers) in which he states that I can take the child to live wherever I see fit be sufficient even though the child is not yet born?
3. Can a document be drawn up that spells out details about child support before the child is born?

Please advise,
Thanks.

 

[Duranie]

The child is going to be an american citizen.

Yes he easily can prevent you from leaving the country with the baby. It is his child too. How is he ever supposed to be able to see the child if you move it so far away? You think that is fair to move 3000 miles away and to ask for support?

You cannot draw up child support before the baby is born. He is not going to have to pay anything until the baby is born and you file for CS in the county where you give birth.

I see big trouble for you though on moving. He does not have to allow it, if I were him I wouldnt allow it. You don't get pregnant by an american, then expect to be able to take the child out of the country, possibly never to be seen again.

 

[carney]

I don't think he can legally prevent her from leaving the country now just because she is pregnant.
Once she has the baby she wouldn't be able to take the baby out of the country without written permission from the father.

 

[carney]

Let me rephrase what I said above. The only way you could leave the country with the baby is if you don't have the baby in NYC but in your home country. The father would have to agree to any papers that would be drawn up letting you leave the country once the baby is born and I doubt he would do that and I doubt a judge would allow that as well. If you can't raise the child in the US alone and need help you should have the help of your family. You are right not to count on help from the father. Have you asked him if he would like to move to Germany to be with you and the baby? If that's not possible and you want to be with your family you have to have the baby in Germany and you could come back to visit with the father or fly him there to visit.

 

[carney]

If you're wishes are not to go back to Germany to live, you might could have the baby in Germany and then come back to the US to live. It might give you more options on leaving the country, but you would have to talk to a lawyer to make sure.

 

[Sandradiana]

thank you for your opinions and it's obvious that your "advise" has only just that. Actually it is quite interesting. I have asked legal questions since I felt that the "Law Forums" was the proper place for it and instead I'll got a moral lecture from Duranie who, obviously does not know the details which, since I did ask a LEGAL question I did not feel were necessary to share.

Fortunately I did more research and just for your information, any unwed mother has automatically SOLE custody of the child (regardless if the birth certificate was signed or not) and that can only be challenged in court.

Once again, thank you for your time.

 

[Sandradiana]

thank you for your opinions and it's obvious that your "advice" has only just that. Actually it is quite interesting. I have asked legal questions since I felt that the "Law Forums" was the proper place for it and instead I'll got a moral lecture from Duranie who, obviously does not know the details which, since I did ask a LEGAL question I did not feel were necessary to share.

Fortunately I did more research and just for your information, any unwed mother has automatically SOLE custody of the child (regardless if the birth certificate was signed or not) and that can only be challenged in court.

Once again, thank you for your time.

 

[Duranie]

Sole custody does not mean you can move out of the country without the fathers permission. That is a huge misunderstanding. Sole custody does not mean you can move the baby whereever you want, sole custody means you have legal custody and you are the residential parent. In fact in most states, you need the fathers permission to get a passport for the baby.

Once the father is declared the legal father, he does have paternal rights. Now if you move without getting him to sign the b/c or the acknowledgement of paternity, then the father has no legal rights and you probably will be able to move without any fight. Of course if you do that there will be no child support either since paternity has not been established before you left the country. .

Regardless if you want to go back to Germany or not, the father does have rights.
If you have the baby in the US and he sees an attorney, he might be able to keep you from leaving the country.

Moral issues not aside, you should not have gotten pregnant out here if you want to take the baby back to germany and expect the father to never see the child.

You are going to have an uphill battle if the legally established father decides not to let you leave with his baby.

To avoid this, move before the baby is born. Father has no rights to the child before its birth. That is the way you can move 100% without any fight or legal ramifications at all.