Want to be Father's

[CombatGuard]

I have a 9 month old son. My ex girlfriend has a boy friend that seems to be trapped in the idea that I'm not to be this boy's father that he is. He has made it clear that I am not wanted around even though my son's mother has declared to want me in my son's life. He has stated that he will influence my son to hate me as the "scumbag" I am. Now, I am not at all happy with this, is there a way I can remove this person from my son's life before he becomes a big problem.

I thank you in advance for your help and will be looking to this post regularly and answer any further quests that could lead me to a conclusion on how to deal with this event.

(The child is mine via court ordered test and my exgrilfriend and I have already been to family court and have set up visitation as well as child support. and I live in New Jersey)

 

[CombatGuard]

To further help with helping me I will provide some background information.

My xg/f and I moved into my mom's house shortly after we found out she was having a child, thing went sour quickly and she moved back into her parent's house. We did not get along for some time and she ended up finding someone to be with which is completely fine in most ways. Since the distance between us (about 2.5 hour by car) I did not have proper transportation to see my son on a regular basis. As with any guy that ends up with a child right out of high school her parents are not to fond of me, quiet expected. Anyway, After some time my son's mother and I made amends and went to family court to get all the nessary obligations on legal records. and it has been about One month and her boyfriend and I are already butting heads, also expected. Now since I was not around either himself or my xg/f put into his head that my son needs a new father that I am not good enough, as any father I beg to differ. He has made clear of his intentions to 1) turn my son against me, 2) raise him, 3) and remove me from his life and he has threated to file charges against me to prevent me from seeing him. I am deeply afraid of loosing my son, I have turn a new leaf and i do not know where I'd be with out him. I have completed all obligations the court laid before me and have been pay child support on time. And as this boy's father I do not believe this guy is good to have in his life, I'd love to be able to remove him but I'm sure it is not at all possable as I'd wish it to happen. Once again, do I have any rights to prevent this from happening? I'm extreamly worried and don't have a clue what to do, I really could use some help and facts.

 

[Scooterdog]

A child has an equal right to be raised by the father, and must be awarded to the father if he is the better parent, or mother is not interested. STANLEY V. ILLINOIS, 405 US 645 (1972)

If custodial mother has boyfriend living with her, state can change custody to father. JARRETT V. JARRETT, 101 S.Ct. 329

Visitation (parenting time) is a constitutionally protected right which can be protected in federal court, even if father is in prison. MABRA V. SCHMIDT, 356 F.Supp. 620

Arguments that Joint Custody constitutes a "fundamental right." BECK V. BECK, 86 N.J. 480, see also 23 Ariz. Law Review 785

Custody can be awarded to father of girls of "tender years" if mother commits perjury, and is otherwise immoral. BEABER V. BEABER, 322 NE 2d 910

 

[Duranie]

I would document this mans threats any way you can, and make it clear to him that you will not communicate with him and that this is between you and the mother.

You might want to google some fathers rights groups, or maybe talk to an attorney about how to best keep this man at bay. Mom can be held in contempt if she does not follow the visitation schedule. What state is the court order out of, NJ? If I were you, at least talk to an attorney to see what can be done with boyfriends threats. BF needs a reality check that you are dad and he is not. In the meantime, I would be digging up background info to check this guys record. Hopefully he does not have a criminal record but if mom is dating him or living with him, you might be able to use that to your advantage. For now, do not communicate with him and let mom know that all correspondence is to go through you and her.