Sex Crimes, Sex Offenders statutory rape victim

[beccaann09]

My name is Rebecca and I'd like to tell you my story. When I was 13 I met a man by the name of Justin. I soon became infatuated with him because I thought he looked like my favorite actor. Don't ask me why because I can't see it in the pictures anymore. I was 13 and Justin was 23. As a 13 year old my hormones were raging. One thing led to another and we eventually ended up having sex. It wasn't forced and if anything I seduced him. It happened three times and it wasn't a month later that he was arrested. But he wasn't arrested for statutory rape. He was arrested for a parole violation and I was with him when it happened. The violation was being in possession of a firearm and it wasn't his fault. The gun was in his car because his dad's truck broke down and Justin went to go pick him up. His dad didn't want to leave the gun in the truck for fear that it would get stolen. When Justin dropped his dad off his dad forgot to take the gun out of the car. On his way to town that night his ex-girlfriend flagged him down and wanted to talk. She proceeded to tell him she was pregnant and when he refused to get back together with her, she got mad. When Justin picked me and another friend up I saw the gun in the car but I didn't think anything of it because around here it's not uncommon for people to have guns in their vehicles. We cruised around our tiny town for a while but it wasn't long before we got pulled over. We were asked to get out of the car and as we watched them search his car, I looked over and saw Justin's ex-girlfriend watching the entire thing go down. There is no doubt in my mind that she found out what was going on between Justin and I and she saw the gun in the car and she called the cops. Why else would she be there? As you can imagine Justin was handcuffed but he was not read his rights. We were all taken to the police station but I had to wait on my dad to come so they could question me. They didn't ask me any questions about the gun that I can remember. The only questions they asked me were about the relationship that Justin and I shared. I lied and told them that we were just friends hanging out. Justin went to prison and we carried on our relationship through letters and expensive phone conversations. After a year of this, DFS confiscated a letter that he sent to me expressing our relationship and that's when all hell broke loose. I was called in to the DFS office and question by a cop, Tim Davis and a social worker, Kelsey Findley. They wouldn't allow my mom into the room. They turned me against Justin by telling me that he had been having a relationship with my mom and telling me that they had letters to prove it. I was confused and mad at both my mom and at Justin. They had both betrayed me. I was so mad that I let it slip that Justin and I had sex before he went to prison. I was then sent to St. Joseph to do a written and video testimony so that I didn't have to go to court. I was also enrolled in unnecessary counseling. I regretted all of this almost immediately although I stayed mad for quite some time as it resulted in my parents getting divorced. Justin went to court and was sentenced to 7 years. He was not given time served. He's been in prison for 5 years now and has had 2 parole hearings. One of them was recently and he was denied an out date and given another parole hearing in February of 2013. In some cases murderers get less time. Our prisons are already full and it's crazy to keep him in there for another 3 years. He is not a dangerous man and he didn't force himself on me. The parole board told him that when he does get out he can't ever have any contact with me again. Well, I'm not mad at him anymore and I still consider him to be a good friend. Also, I am 18 years old (almost 19), and I think that I'm old enough to decide whether or not I want to be in contact with him. I have not been traumatized in any way and if I had been it would have been because of the way things were handled not because of the things that happened. I've moved on with my life. I now have a one year old son and I'm getting married in July. He's wasted 5 years of his life in prison for having CONSENSUAL sex with a minor. It's time to release him back into society and let him live his life.

My question is how can I help him? I am willing to do whatever it takes to right this wrong. If anybody out there can give me some advice, I would completely appreciate it.

 

[army judge]

My name is Rebecca and I'd like to tell you my story. When I was 13 I met a man by the name of Justin. I soon became infatuated with him because I thought he looked like my favorite actor. Don't ask me why because I can't see it in the pictures anymore. I was 13 and Justin was 23. As a 13 year old my hormones were raging. One thing led to another and we eventually ended up having sex. It wasn't forced and if anything I seduced him. It happened three times and it wasn't a month later that he was arrested. But he wasn't arrested for statutory rape. He was arrested for a parole violation and I was with him when it happened. The violation was being in possession of a firearm and it wasn't his fault. The gun was in his car because his dad's truck broke down and Justin went to go pick him up. His dad didn't want to leave the gun in the truck for fear that it would get stolen. When Justin dropped his dad off his dad forgot to take the gun out of the car. On his way to town that night his ex-girlfriend flagged him down and wanted to talk. She proceeded to tell him she was pregnant and when he refused to get back together with her, she got mad. When Justin picked me and another friend up I saw the gun in the car but I didn't think anything of it because around here it's not uncommon for people to have guns in their vehicles. We cruised around our tiny town for a while but it wasn't long before we got pulled over. We were asked to get out of the car and as we watched them search his car, I looked over and saw Justin's ex-girlfriend watching the entire thing go down. There is no doubt in my mind that she found out what was going on between Justin and I and she saw the gun in the car and she called the cops. Why else would she be there? As you can imagine Justin was handcuffed but he was not read his rights. We were all taken to the police station but I had to wait on my dad to come so they could question me. They didn't ask me any questions about the gun that I can remember. The only questions they asked me were about the relationship that Justin and I shared. I lied and told them that we were just friends hanging out. Justin went to prison and we carried on our relationship through letters and expensive phone conversations. After a year of this, DFS confiscated a letter that he sent to me expressing our relationship and that's when all hell broke loose. I was called in to the DFS office and question by a cop, Tim Davis and a social worker, Kelsey Findley. They wouldn't allow my mom into the room. They turned me against Justin by telling me that he had been having a relationship with my mom and telling me that they had letters to prove it. I was confused and mad at both my mom and at Justin. They had both betrayed me. I was so mad that I let it slip that Justin and I had sex before he went to prison. I was then sent to St. Joseph to do a written and video testimony so that I didn't have to go to court. I was also enrolled in unnecessary counseling. I regretted all of this almost immediately although I stayed mad for quite some time as it resulted in my parents getting divorced. Justin went to court and was sentenced to 7 years. He was not given time served. He's been in prison for 5 years now and has had 2 parole hearings. One of them was recently and he was denied an out date and given another parole hearing in February of 2013. In some cases murderers get less time. Our prisons are already full and it's crazy to keep him in there for another 3 years. He is not a dangerous man and he didn't force himself on me. The parole board told him that when he does get out he can't ever have any contact with me again. Well, I'm not mad at him anymore and I still consider him to be a good friend. Also, I am 18 years old (almost 19), and I think that I'm old enough to decide whether or not I want to be in contact with him. I have not been traumatized in any way and if I had been it would have been because of the way things were handled not because of the things that happened. I've moved on with my life. I now have a one year old son and I'm getting married in July. He's wasted 5 years of his life in prison for having CONSENSUAL sex with a minor. It's time to release him back into society and let him live his life.

My question is how can I help him? I am willing to do whatever it takes to right this wrong. If anybody out there can give me some advice, I would completely appreciate it.

The best thing for you to do is seek some counselling.

You have some issues that are not yet known to you.

You can hurt yourself, and I doubt there is anything you can do to help him.

This 23 year old was already a convicted felon.

You are naive if you think he didn't know about that gun.

You are even more naive if you allow HIM to damage your familial relationships.

Children can nor consent to sex.

You were raped, pure and simple.

You were assaulted by a wily, old, fox.

You would be best served to keep your distance form this pervert.

You are free to do whatever you wish.

But, I won't give you license to ignore the voices in your head that are shouting; DANGER, DANGER, DANGER!!!

As far as the CONVICTED FELON and pervert, reading him his rights was not required.

Besides, I'm sure he knew them by heart.

As a felon on parole, he was breaking the law by engaging in prohibited acts with a 13 year old girl.

A parole must obey all laws while on parole.

If he violates one law, he can be sent back to the pen, almost summarily.

Justin knew that, because he had to sign several documents to that effect!!

 

[army judge]

One more thing, there is NO law that permits adults to engage in what you term, "CONSENSUAL SEX WITH A MINOR"!!!

No state in this country legalized that form of CRIMINAL CONDUCT!!!!

When Justin gets out and has served all of his time, you and he can do whatever you desire.

He'll be a free man in THREE MORE YEARS.

I'm sure there won't be dozens of young girls standing at the prison gate to greet him.

But, when you and he HOOK UP, it won't be long until he's found another 13 or 14 year old girl to defile!!!

Will you still think that its now okay for 35 year old men to ravish little girls?

 

[army judge]

Why not love your baby and your soon to be husband?
Both of them are worth you and your love.
Both of them need you.
Justin will only ruin what you are building.
Heck, what if Justin ravished your dear, little baby?
Stay away from that creep.

 

[beccaann09]

I know what I have and I know what I want to do. I don't need you telling me how to live my life. I do love my son and my soon to be husband. I am almost 19 years old and I can make my own decision. I asked for advice on a legal matter not personal advice so lets just stick to what I asked for please.

 

[army judge]

I know what I have and I know what I want to do. I don't need you telling me how to live my life. I do love my son and my soon to be husband. I am almost 19 years old and I can make my own decision. I asked for advice on a legal matter not personal advice so lets just stick to what I asked for please.

Hire a lawyer and pay for the advice, genius.

I'm not going to provide a smart mouthed kid the benefit of my law degree and forty years of practicing law; to assist in helping a convicted child molester and rapist.

Quite frankly, I'm glad the state slammed the door on that creep.

 

[beccaann09]

You don't know me and you don't know him. I'd be glad if somebody would slam the door on your advice because it sucks. I asked for advice not your opinion, if you're not going to help then keep your mouth shut.

 

[army judge]

You don't know me and you don't know him. I'd be glad if somebody would slam the door on your advice because it sucks. I asked for advice not your opinion, if you're not going to help then keep your mouth shut.

Actually, my mouth is closed when I type.
Unlike most child molesters and rapists, I'm not a MOUTH BREATHER.

 

[beccaann09]

Just shut up and let people who actually want to help me answer the question instead of filling up the boards with your useless crap.

 

[army judge]

Just shut up and let people who actually want to help me answer the question instead of filling up the boards with your useless crap.

My useless advice is all your useless questions deserve.

Looks like no one else is inclined to assist child molesters and rapists get out of the slammer.

 

[bluemann33]

My useless advice is all your useless questions deserve.

Looks like no one else is inclined to assist child molesters and rapists get out of the slammer.

So true. This Justin guy does not deserve to be let out nor will he be allowed to. He raped a 13 year old child Army is not trying to tell you how to live your life, just simply trying to help you. Any grown man that would have sex with a child should be locked up. I hope you let the past go and enjoy your future. By the way even if you went to court and sya you wanted him and let him, no judge in his/her right mind would let that be justification. He was the adult who should have known better.

 

[beccaann09]

I am not here to be ganged up on. I am here looking for serious legal advice. If you can't provide that then please don't reply. I don't care about what you think should have happened or that you're glad that it happened. I DON'T CARE! Provide some LEGAL advice or don't reply at all. THANK YOU!

 

[Proserpina]

I am not here to be ganged up on. I am here looking for serious legal advice. If you can't provide that then please don't reply. I don't care about what you think should have happened or that you're glad that it happened. I DON'T CARE! Provide some LEGAL advice or don't reply at all. THANK YOU!

You cannot help him.

He is serving the CORRECT sentence for raping a child (who cannot legally consent to sex - you need to understand that).

His sentence could have been a heck of a lot more serious, actually - given that he was 23, and you were 13.

The responses you have received are coming from people who do NOT think that it's ok for 23 year old men to have sex with children.

 

[beccaann09]

Okay then let me ask another question? Can adults not make the same mistakes? Have you ever gotten drunk and had sex with somebody that you wouldn't have if you had been sober? I can help him and I will and I don't care what any of you think about it. I asked for legal advice not the useless OPINIONS of ignorant people who don't share the same views as me. At 13 years old I was responsible for my actions. I may not have had any rights in the eyes of the court but I had the choice. Adults are capable of making the same mistakes as children so I don't want to hear that I could not make that decision because obviously I DID. Is it also wrong for somebody who is 33 to have sex with somebody who is 23? It's the same age difference. I have always gone for older guys and still continue to do so to this day. If you don't have any information on how to help me with what I asked for then please do not reply.

 

[cbg]

I'm sorry, Rebecca, but if you are looking for someone here to justify the choice HE made to violate the law, you're in the wrong place. Regardless of how hard you try to take responsibility (and good for you for doing that, anyway) the law does not allow you to take that responsibility, and nothing anyone here can say is going to change that. Justin was WRONG for what he did, and all the insisting that you made a choice does not change that.

And no, I think you will find that quite a few of us have never gotten drunk and had sex with someone they wouldn't have otherwise. I never have. I have too much respect for myself to do that.

 

[Proserpina]

Okay then let me ask another question? Can adults not make the same mistakes? Have you ever gotten drunk and had sex with somebody that you wouldn't have if you had been sober?

Not with a 13 year old, nope.

I can help him and I will and I don't care what any of you think about it. I asked for legal advice not the useless OPINIONS of ignorant people who don't share the same views as me. At 13 years old I was responsible for my actions.

No, you were not. Because you were a child.

I may not have had any rights in the eyes of the court but I had the choice. Adults are capable of making the same mistakes as children so I don't want to hear that I could not make that decision because obviously I DID.

This alone indicates your lack of maturity.

Is it also wrong for somebody who is 33 to have sex with somebody who is 23? It's the same age difference. I have always gone for older guys and still continue to do so to this day. If you don't have any information on how to help me with what I asked for then please do not reply.

If you cannot realize the difference between 13 & 23, and 23 & 33, then you need far more help than you realize.

 

[jharris352]

Ok Army, I definitely agree with you on this one.

Becca, what you don't seem to understand is we ARE giving you legal advice. What you are asking for is how to circumvent the law to get what you want. There is no answer to your question. The guy was a parolee who knew having sex with you was a crime no matter whether you wanted to or not. That's not an opinion that's the law. He went back to jail because he was a parolee in possession of a fire arm, again a law, not opinion.

You did nothing wrong by telling them the truth about having sex with him. If you had lied and said you had sex with him when you didn't I would be defending him. Army is calling him a pervert and such, I understand what he is saying, that part is an opinion even if it is a sound one. But you say you want the law, here it is, the LAW says he is a rapist. That isn't an opinion. It's just the fact.

You can't do anything to help him but leave him alone. He will have his time done soon enough and be out. If he has learned anything he will pick older playmates. You now have your life to live and you will be responsible for your choices too. Good luck with them. But don't get mad at us because we tell you about a law that doesn't agree with your opinion.

 

[Gail_in_Georgia]

There is another issue besides the fact that at age 13, the law says that you cannot give consent for sexual contact with an adult.

You indicated Justin already had a criminal record prior to you meeting him. Missouri...like many states has a "three strikes and you're out" rule for repeat offenders. If this was his third time "out" he will serve his entire sentence without the hope of early parole.

My partners brother is in the same situation (in South Carolina); a three time loser whose last offense seemed fairly minor (threatened a girlfriend and then took a swing at the policewoman who came to check out the call).

Got a 15 year sentence for this and, although he has had regular parole hearings (and resides in a minimum security prison, has been a fairly benign inmate, working as a file clerk in the wardens office and cutting the grass outside the prison fence) he will never get early parole and will remain incarcerated until he serves his entire 15 years.

Gail

 

[sexysadie]

She isnt looking for someone to JUSTIFY his choice.

You sound very intelligent and literate. It is highly possible that there are issues unknown to you, hidden in your psyche and waiting to rear their ugly heads, but, to play the devil's advocate, I will give you the benefit of the doubt that you are of sound mind when saying you want a rapist out of prison.

If you can contact the parole board with an intelligent, sincere account of the facts of the situation that occured when you were 13, it might sway their decision to grant parole.

What exactly do you think can be done? I guess you could rally a picket group to walk the prison perimeter.