Where do I stand after moving to A diff state

[Anthony77]

Jurisdiction

Arizona

Hello, in this particular situation I need some opinions in regards of how to proceed and what to expect. Back in 2018 we got separated and today is been over 4 years. we got married in California back in 2001. So when we got separated she moved to Arizona to live with her sister and she took the kids with her, I stayed in california... but moved in with my brother.. meanwhile through out all these past 4 plus years i been sending her child support money ( not ordered by the court) while also visiting them once or twice a year, now this past november I decided to move to Arizona to be now more closer and be more acttive with my two kids now 12 and 7...at the same time to get divorced. Now my income isnt much on a monthly basis, so I dont know what help i can get over here in order to get legal advice or IF the only route is to hire an attorney and pay the BILL for the services!.. the mother of our kids makes more income than me on a weekly basis at this particular time. She is being difficult with me when i am asking now for 50/50 custody of our kids, she says she takes care better of our kids that i can. BUT from monday trhu saturday she works from 5am to 6pm and she barely spends time with the kids. So i dont know if thats good parenting from her part. I have found the kids by them self at her house several times with no adult supervision when i go to their house to pick them up to spend time with them (4-5 hours)... I do this twice a week, I feed them ( go somewhere to eat, go to the park, buy them clothes, etc. then drop them back off at their mothers house once an adult is there)....When I asked her why the kids are at her house alone she gets very aggressive. So now she told me she will serve me the divorce papers very soon and she wont give me 50/50 custody. What are my options here? And of course what is the right amount of child support in Arizona if making $850 gross weekly?

 

[justblue]

Hello, in this particular situation I need some opinions in regards of how to proceed and what to expect. Back in 2018 we got separated and today is been over 4 years. we got married in California back in 2001. So when we got separated she moved to Arizona to live with her sister and she took the kids with her, I stayed in california... but moved in with my brother.. meanwhile through out all these past 4 plus years i been sending her child support money ( not ordered by the court) while also visiting them once or twice a year, now this past november I decided to move to Arizona to be now more closer and be more acttive with my two kids now 12 and 7...at the same time to get divorced. Now my income isnt much on a monthly basis, so I dont know what help i can get over here in order to get legal advice or IF the only route is to hire an attorney and pay the BILL for the services!.. the mother of our kids makes more income than me on a weekly basis at this particular time. She is being difficult with me when i am asking now for 50/50 custody of our kids, she says she takes care better of our kids that i can. BUT from monday trhu saturday she works from 5am to 6pm and she barely spends time with the kids. So i dont know if thats good parenting from her part. I have found the kids by them self at her house several times with no adult supervision when i go to their house to pick them up to spend time with them (4-5 hours)... I do this twice a week, I feed them ( go somewhere to eat, go to the park, buy them clothes, etc. then drop them back off at their mothers house once an adult is there)....When I asked her why the kids are at her house alone she gets very aggressive. So now she told me she will serve me the divorce papers very soon and she wont give me 50/50 custody. What are my options here? And of course what is the right amount of child support in Arizona if making $850 gross weekly?

Child Support Calculator

Run the #'s through the calculator and that will give you an idea of what your supports order will be.

I truly doubt that a Judge will make such a drastic custody change. You should also look at AZ standard custody guidelines.

https://www.azcourts.gov/portals/31/parentingTime/PPWguidelines.pdf

 

[army judge]

meanwhile through out all these past 4 plus years i been sending her child support money ( not ordered by the court) while also visiting them once or twice a year

I regret to be the one bringing you bad news, mate.

What you call "child support" payments, the court will see as GIFTS.

The only way any money you give or send to the person you bred children with can be considered CHILD SUPPORT payments would be money you send to the person pursuant to a court decree, or an agreement you've entered into with state's child support unit, which goes by many names throughout the various states.

I humbly submit and suggest you prepare yourself for some very disturbing, shocking, financially devastating news; once the person in possession of the kiddos obtains a court order, or child support agreement from the state's child collection support entity.

Why?

Because NONE of that money you've GIVEN her over the years will count toward what the state she now lives in determines what you'll pay each month going forward, plus what you'll be assessed for NOT paying her/him/it over the past (soon to be) FIVE = 5 years!!!!!!

While you're preparing for a sad reckoning with massive debt, the child SUPPORT TSUNAMI will begin to consume the money you acquire from legal sources, such as work.

In addition, any IRS or state tax refunds will be eagerly slurped up and given to the person controlling the little cash, darlings.

Lastly, it would be financially unsound to even consider breeding until you've managed to get the child support monkey off your back.

 

[Zigner]

I regret to be the one bringing you bad news, mate.

What you call "child support" payments, the court will see as GIFTS.

The only way any money you give or send to the person you bred children with can be considered CHILD SUPPORT payments would be money you send to the person pursuant to a court decree, or an agreement you've entered into with state's child support unit, which goes by many names throughout the various states.

I humbly submit and suggest you prepare yourself for some very disturbing, shocking, financially devastating news; once the person in possession of the kiddos obtains a court order, or child support agreement from the state's child collection support entity.

Why?

Because NONE of that money you've GIVEN her over the years will count toward what the state she now lives in determines what you'll pay each month going forward, plus what you'll be assessed for NOT paying her/him/it over the past (soon to be) FIVE = 5 years!!!!!!

While you're preparing for a sad reckoning with massive debt, the child SUPPORT TSUNAMI will begin to consume the money you acquire from legal sources, such as work.

In addition, any IRS or state tax refunds will be eagerly slurped up and given to the person controlling the little cash, darlings.

Lastly, it would be financially unsound to even consider breeding until you've managed to get the child support monkey off your back.

View attachment 4173

Just some clarification -
While Arizona does allow for retroactive child support, it's only retroactive to a maximum of 3 years prior to the date of filing, so the OP shouldn't be looking at 5(ish) years worth of support in this case (unless it's dragged out for some reason).

For reference, here is the statute on it: Arizona Revised Statute 25-320
and here is an Arizona attorney's write-up on the matter (not an endorsement, just a reference): Arizona Law On Retroactive Child Support

 

[zddoodah]

i am asking now for 50/50 custody of our kids

What exactly does that mean? Do you really expect they'll spend 50% of the time with each of you? For that even to be practical, you'll have to live very close to where your wife lives. Have you picked out a place? On top of practicalities, do you really expect to go immediately from you seeing them once or twice a year to spending 50% of their time with you?

from monday trhu saturday she works from 5am to 6pm and she barely spends time with the kids.

OK...and I imagine that, for most of that time, the kids are in school. Right?

So i dont know if thats good parenting from her part.

It's certainly not BAD parenting. It sounds like a pretty standard full-time job with a commute.

I have found the kids by them self at her house several times with no adult supervision when i go to their house to pick them up to spend time with them (4-5 hours)... I do this twice a week

Huh? You said you live in another state and only visit once or twice a year and that you have "decided to move" to their state. In any event, there's no reason why kids of those ages can't be home alone after school.

So now she told me she will serve me the divorce papers very soon and she wont give me 50/50 custody.

Custody isn't hers to "give" or not "give." It's for the court to order. Since you're the one seeking a change in the status quo, the burden will be on you to convince the court that whatever it is you want is in the kids' best interests. Don't expect to go into court and say, "I want 50/50 custody," and have the judge say, "ok." You're going to have to explain to the judge exactly what that means and why it's in your kids' best interests. If the evidence supports you and the judge agrees, then there you go.

What are my options here?

Your options are to accept the status quo, to try and negotiate something different with your wife, or to let the court decide.

what is the right amount of child support in Arizona if making $850 gross weekly?

I'd suggest googling "arizona child support calculator." Far more information will be required than simply one party's income.

 

[army judge]

Just some clarification -
While Arizona does allow for retroactive child support, it's only retroactive to a maximum of 3 years prior to the date of filing, so the OP shouldn't be looking at 5(ish) years worth of support in this case (unless it's dragged out for some reason).

For reference, here is the statute on it: Arizona Revised Statute 25-320
and here is an Arizona attorney's write-up on the matter (not an endorsement, just a reference): Arizona Law On Retroactive Child Support

Just for clarification, I've never been stalked, hunted, or sought to pay any type of child support or spousal maintenance.

If I had been in such an unenviable position, I'd find three years of back support as troubling as three days.

That said, I'm certain your clarification materials will be much appreciated by the OP, assuming he/she/it returns to read it.

Excuse me, I must return to DEWIN' what I've come to DEW best, NUTTIN', lots more NUTTIN'...

 

[Zigner]

Just for clarification, I've never been stalked, hunted, or sought to pay any type of child support or spousal maintenance.

I've been the stalker, hunter, and seeker of just such support...

 

[justblue]

I've been the stalker, hunter, and seeker of just such support...

Some day, Zig, you will get that boat.

 

[Red Kayak]

these past 4 plus years i been sending her child support money ( not ordered by the court)

From a legal standpoint, in the absence of a court order, this is not child support.

Some day, Zig, you will get that boat.

Correction: jet airplane

 

[leslie82]

Hello, in this particular situation I need some opinions in regards of how to proceed and what to expect. Back in 2018 we got separated and today is been over 4 years. we got married in California back in 2001. So when we got separated she moved to Arizona to live with her sister and she took the kids with her, I stayed in california... but moved in with my brother.. meanwhile through out all these past 4 plus years i been sending her child support money ( not ordered by the court) while also visiting them once or twice a year, now this past november I decided to move to Arizona to be now more closer and be more acttive with my two kids now 12 and 7...at the same time to get divorced. Now my income isnt much on a monthly basis, so I dont know what help i can get over here in order to get legal advice or IF the only route is to hire an attorney and pay the BILL for the services!.. the mother of our kids makes more income than me on a weekly basis at this particular time. She is being difficult with me when i am asking now for 50/50 custody of our kids, she says she takes care better of our kids that i can. BUT from monday trhu saturday she works from 5am to 6pm and she barely spends time with the kids. So i dont know if thats good parenting from her part. I have found the kids by them self at her house several times with no adult supervision when i go to their house to pick them up to spend time with them (4-5 hours)... I do this twice a week, I feed them ( go somewhere to eat, go to the park, buy them clothes, etc. then drop them back off at their mothers house once an adult is there)....When I asked her why the kids are at her house alone she gets very aggressive. So now she told me she will serve me the divorce papers very soon and she wont give me 50/50 custody. What are my options here? And of course what is the right amount of child support in Arizona if making $850 gross weekly?

So you think because she works so much to take care of the kids she's not a good parent? You think because you see them twice a week for a few hours you have any clue what her parenting is like? I'm a single parent. I work 630 am to 5 pm M-F. If my ex husband were even an involved parent and he came over twice a week for a few hours and tried to question my parenting, I'd probably do the same thing your wife is doing to you.

SHE doesn't give you custody. A judge decides custody. Also I'm pretty sure every childl support agency has a calculator on their website or explains how they calculate child support. It's based on your income, her income and I think they include if one or both parents provide insurance.

You should probably Google "Arizona family law attorneys who offer free consultations" to get the most accurate legal advice for Arizona. No one on here can give you any legal advice at all.