Questions about child abuse and neglect

T

Taticorrynn

New Member
Jurisdiction
California
I previously posted about seeking emancipation, but my plans have changed. 3 days ago my mother locked me outside of the house at night in 40 degree weather for an hour with no shoes and in very thin pajamas. Because I had an attitude. Before that, she also hit me in the nose. She would not let me into the house, and I was forced to call the police. I reported everything. All of the previous abuse and neglect; everything. The police contacted CPS. After I was let into the house, my mom made me sleep on the floor with nothing. No pillow or blanket. The next morning, she unlocked my room and packed me 2 bags. She said that she would be taking me to a psychiatric facility. She packed bags for all of my siblings and said that they would have to lay low for a few days because of cps. So we left. And we drove for hours (meanwhile I was having a breakdown in the back seat). She finally decided to turn around and go back home... she had done all of that to torture me mentally. When we got home, she went through my room and threw away most of my personal items (pictures, clothes, journals.). I couldn't take it any more. I ran away from home and my boyfriends family picked me up. My sister had been chasing me, and when they got me in the car, she shattered their windshield. They immediately called the police on the way home and told the police that they had me. when we got to their home, 2 officers came and took a report. They decided to let me stay there for a few days; and then went to talk to my parents. Unfortunately my mother made a huge fuss, and they had to take me home an hour after they left, with a promise to have cps come as soon as possible to investigate. It's been almost 2 days since, and child protective services still hasn't come. I am starting to worry. Things are getting increasingly bad here, and I need an out. What are my legal options? who can I contact to get further assistance? How can I get out of this situation in the cleanest and easiest possible way? once I leave, can I get a restraining order against my parents? If you have any information, I would appreciate it. Thank you.
 
Taticorrynn said:
What are my legal options?
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You have no legal options. You are a "legal incompetent".
No court recognizes you, except a juvenile court which will probably end up adjudicating you under a CHINS petition, "Child In Need of Services".

Your immediate option is do as your parental units instruct.

Continued defiance, especially running away to the house of a male friend, will only result in your ruination at your own hands.

You are not the first minor, nor will you be the last to buck the system.

You will eventually lose.

Your mother might shed a tear or two, but you'll shed a bucket of tears nightly in a cold, sterile, stern state run home for youth.

Your most recent caper has closed the window on emancipation permanently.

THINK.

I'm sure you can see where this is headed.

This will NOT end well for YOU, and YOU alone.

Your recent actions affect no one, hamper no one, harm no one BUT you.


Taticorrynn said:
Who can I contact to get further assistance?
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You can pester CPS until they place you in the foster care system.

Trust me, foster care is far worse than where you reside now.

If you keep up the resistance, you might even make it to the big time, a state run youth camp.

No, its not a camp, its a prison of sorts.





Taticorrynn said:
How can I get out of this situation in the cleanest and easiest possible way?
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You can allow yourself to age until you become an adult, age 18 years old all across this nation. There are a few exceptions that make it age 19, or 21. Your state is the same as most, 18 years of age to reach majority.




Taticorrynn said:
Once I leave, can I get a restraining order against my parents?
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You are what the law calls a "legal incompetent".

No court will recognize you, or your presence. Legally, as a minor you don't exist. You are a human, but not what the calls a "person".

Those who reach majority are persons, as are corporations.

You can't even petition the court to obtain a restraining order, however if you continue with your shenanigans you'll end up restrained. You'll end up in a group home for wayward youth, or possibly a state run reform school or camp.
 
With all of this you can kiss emancipation goodbye... Not that it was a realistic option anyway.
Mom is the boss. Like it or not you need to follow the rules. Your friend's family can get in trouble if they take you in. Do them a favor and stay away.
I agree you do not have legal options. Your parents make legal decisions for you.
The best you likely can do is report what you think is abuse to a school counselor. What you think is abuse may not actually be abuse as far as the law is concerned. Parents are allowed to discipline their children in many ways.
Who can you contact? I suggest you speak with a school counselor about all of this. The counselor is required by law to report suspected abuse to child services or law enforcement. It will be investigated, but an investigate may easily absolve your mother of any wrongdoing. Do not expect to get the changes you want, but that is the most direct way you can get the intervention you are looking for.
 
mightymoose said:
With all of this you can kiss emancipation goodbye... Not that it was a realistic option anyway.
Mom is the boss. Like it or not you need to follow the rules. Your friend's family can get in trouble if they take you in. Do them a favor and stay away.
I agree you do not have legal options. Your parents make legal decisions for you.
The best you likely can do is report what you think is abuse to a school counselor. What you think is abuse may not actually be abuse as far as the law is concerned. Parents are allowed to discipline their children in many ways.
Who can you contact? I suggest you speak with a school counselor about all of this. The counselor is required by law to report suspected abuse to child services or law enforcement. It will be investigated, but an investigate may easily absolve your mother of any wrongdoing. Do not expect to get the changes you want, but that is the most direct way you can get the intervention you are looking for.
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My mom took me out of school, and will not let me return until next school year.
 
Are you being home schooled or any other program? If not then it is one more thing to tell social services when you eventually speak with them.
If nothing else you can always pick up the phone and call social services or police.
I suspect much of what you are unhappy about is not anything they will be concerned about, but they will investigate to make sure. Don't cry wolf or it will start to work against you.

CDSS Public Site > Reporting > Report Abuse > Child Protective Services > Report Child Abuse
 
mightymoose said:
Are you being home schooled or any other program? If not then it is one more thing to tell social services when you eventually speak with them.
If nothing else you can always pick up the phone and call social services or police.
I suspect much of what you are unhappy about is not anything they will be concerned about, but they will investigate to make sure. Don't cry wolf or it will start to work against you.

CDSS Public Site > Reporting > Report Abuse > Child Protective Services > Report Child Abuse
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No. Is this legal?
 
Use the link I gave above. Contact child services in your county and tell them everything. They will sort out what is important and what is not and make sure you are not being mistreated (not to say that you are being mistreated).
 
If this happened three days ago, it's a bit soon for anyone to be concerned about your missing school. If your expectations are that Mom will immediately be arrested or sued or otherwise chastised by the legal system because her runaway daughter missed three days of school, you might want to modify them a trifle. For all you know, she's in the process of signing you up for homeschooling, online school or boarding school even as we speak and just hasn't told you about it yet.
 
I don't think we've been given a time frame on the school issue. The three days mentioned in the initial post was apparently for a different event.
Regardless, social services will certainly look in to it.
 
cbg said:
If this happened three days ago, it's a bit soon for anyone to be concerned about your missing school. If your expectations are that Mom will immediately be arrested or sued or otherwise chastised by the legal system because her runaway daughter missed three days of school, you might want to modify them a trifle. For all you know, she's in the process of signing you up for homeschooling, online school or boarding school even as we speak and just hasn't told you about it yet.
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I was in independent study. She already physically went and signed papers to take me out of school. I was almost finished with the semester? And she refuses to put me into a school, so I won't be able to finish.
 
Th
mightymoose said:
Use the link I gave above. Contact child services in your county and tell them everything. They will sort out what is important and what is not and make sure you are not being mistreated (not to say that you are being mistreated).
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Thank you, I will do that. And my mother took me out of school today (independent study), even though I only had a couple weeks left of school. She refuses to put me into a school, so I will not be able to finish the semester, and I will be behind.
 
Well as we mentioned above, it is too soon to make an issue of your being out of school, but you are legally required to attend so social services would make sure something is in the works for you.
Still... I suspect even if you report these things you will find social services sides with your mother on most of it. They are there for you though. You can always contact them for help and they will always investigate.
Your perception of right and wrong and fair is likely very different from your mother's and what is legally required.
My opinion means nothing. Theirs does. Contact them if you are having trouble.
 
mightymoose said:
Well as we mentioned above, it is too soon to make an issue of your being out of school, but you are legally required to attend so social services would make sure something is in the works for you.
Still... I suspect even if you report these things you will find social services sides with your mother on most of it. They are there for you though. You can always contact them for help and they will always investigate.
Your perception of right and wrong and fair is likely very different from your mother's and what is legally required.
My opinion means nothing. Theirs does. Contact them if you are having trouble.
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Thank you very much. This information was very helpful. I will be in contact with them, and let them do their jobs and come to their own conclusion.
 
the Original Post was made yesterday so as it's Friday OP wouldn't have even had a chance to "miss" school. Even a week generally isn't concerning especially if the custodial parent has informed the school the child will be removed. IF you want to report your own situation you're always welcome to call DSS (DCFS or whomever in your state) and report your own circumstances and ask questions. You're never NOT allowed to report on yourself, and IF you dont agree with your situation (aka mother says she's homeschooling but you never receive any actual schooling ) that may be an issue, it may not be.

I would suggest giving things a few days before calling to see what actually happens but if you feel that you are in immediate danger please seek help
 
No one is questioning that she's removed you from school. What is far from clear is that she does not have some kind of plan for continuing your education. She has no incentive to tell you what it is before she implements it so you don't necessarily know what she's planning.
 

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