false allegation child abuse

G

gauri

New Member
Hello All,

First of all I request not to judge our case here. My story is a rare case.

I have been diagnosed chlamydia, my husband with Gonorrhea and my six year old daughter is also Gonorrhea. So according to my dr its not possible to spread this disease with out sex. But my daughter dr examined her for any sexual abuse and did not find any physical damage to her vagina. But she needs to file 51 A as we all three has positive STD. Her Dr is also agreed with the possibility of spreading the virus through non sexual contact but she said its very rare.

Now DCF (department of child and family) lady came to our house and interviewed all my family member and said she does not find any unusual thing among my family that could be suspicious. Now DCF has sent this matter to general attorney of the town. They now assigned a detective who will meet us soon.

Since we had not done any crime and we have nothing to hide so, do I need to worry to hire a lawyer to speak to the detective?

How long this case will be take?

What is the worst scenario we may face?

Any other related suggestion which I may have not asked?

Thanks,
Gauri
 
Other than sexual contact the only way to get gonorrhea that I know of is from the mother before birth. Is it possible she received it from you and never developed symptoms until now? Ask your doctor.
The suspicions are understandable. You should have a good talk with your daughter and see if she divulges anything, or consider using a counselor if she isn't comfortable talking with you. If you have any suspicions at all I suggest you do whatever is necessary to protect your children.
That said, understand that you have no legal obligation to speak with social workers or police. It is totally voluntary. Your children should know to not speak with anyone unless you are present.
With the info you give here I strongly recommend you speak with an attorney before agreeing to have anyone in your family interviewed.
 
You pose a very intriguing question, OP.
Moose has given you the two best nuggets of advice, and I'll repeat them.
First, hire yourselves a lawyer. If you can't afford a lawyer, the second piece of advice applies, don't talk to anyone about this, especially your husband.

I don't see the authorities focusing too much on you initially. It's your husband who they'll be scrutinizing. That said, talking to child services, the police, or anyone will only serve to make your lives miserable.

The child should also be instructed to not speak to ANY ADULTS unless you are present. Of course when you appear, you simply say, under advice of our attorney, and in accordance woth our legal rights we wish to remain silent.

I think you suspicion what's happening, or happened. Just stay calm, because your situation could be caused by one or two very rare circumstances. Frankly, I feel you and your child are innocent. But, I'm nobody, and my feelings mean nothing to you.

I wish you the best. Please come back and tell us how this case is progressing.

Here's some reading about one of the diseases.

https://www.health.ny.gov/diseases/communicable/gonorrhea/fact_sheet.htm
 
Under no circumstances should any of you talk to Police or DCF without an Attorney. You may well be innocent but fact remains that this child got this somewhere and you two (your husband more) are the two most likely sources. DCF and Police will want to pin this on you and regardless of the physical examine its still possible however unlikely. You need to be protected so again seek out an Attorney and tell both Police and DCF that none of you will discuss this matter without your Attorney present. It may well make you look guilty but it is for your protection. If you use the "Parentnook" link in my signature line and ask your question there you will likely find a user who was also falsely accused of abuse and how he and his wife fought this and won once he knew his rights.
 
so now speaking to so many attorney , we are still bit confused, if we have't done anything and about which we are 200% sure. We also know that if we are properly investigated on medical ground or any other ground we will win the case in the end. So what is a better path, going through attorney or let the DCF inquire in their own way. As per you all guiding us that we should hire an attorney but I am still feeling that these people will see that we are not against them and cooperating them well...so that may we can have less pain....please lets have some light on my statement

Second question:

One of the attorney(rest of the attorney advising what u guys advice here) told us that if we don't have anything to hide, three things can happen as below

1. they will file the case in senior court (worst case)
2. they will file the case in lower court
3. they will not do anything if they found us innocent

So I again seek your guidance how are the possibility we can fall into case 1 here?
 
If you asked 100 people a question and 99 all said same thing and one said something else who would you side with? Even the Lawyers you spoke with most agree with us. This is not something you want to trust to deal with yourself one slip could be a BIG problem. Hire an Attorney let them deal with Police and DCF or at least advise you what you should or should not say. By the way you WONT be found innocent. Best outcome would be for DCF to list the complaint as "unfounded" Once again I direct you to the forum Parentnook forums (link below) hosted by this site! There is a user there who also dealt with a false accusation and that person can tell you how they dealt with it.
 
gauri said:
so now speaking to so many attorney , we are still bit confused, if we have't done anything and about which we are 200% sure. We also know that if we are properly investigated on medical ground or any other ground we will win the case in the end. So what is a better path, going through attorney or let the DCF inquire in their own way. As per you all guiding us that we should hire an attorney but I am still feeling that these people will see that we are not against them and cooperating them well...so that may we can have less pain....please lets have some light on my statement

Second question:

One of the attorney(rest of the attorney advising what u guys advice here) told us that if we don't have anything to hide, three things can happen as below

1. they will file the case in senior court (worst case)
2. they will file the case in lower court
3. they will not do anything if they found us innocent

So I again seek your guidance how are the possibility we can fall into case 1 here?
Click to expand...



Here's your problem, and its faced by 100% of those that are investigated by the government and its agents.
You aren't required to prove your innocence.
Why?
Because its impossible for you to do so, and its NOT required.

Our system requires the government to PROVE your guilt BEYOND a reasonable doubt.
That's a very high burden.

Its never wise to talk to the police, or any government agent.
Your words can be twisted, and even a small misspeak, as in it was Tuesday, May 25th, when you meant Wednesday, May 26th, can get you charged with lying to the police.
That is a battle you will never win.

Here, take a look at this video, as this lawyer and law professor (friend of mine) explains why its not wise to ever talk to the police:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wXkI4t7nuc

You don't want to know how you can end up in your example 1.

You want to know how to lessen the pain this could cause you. That is by NOT talking to the government or its agents.

You can't prevent the government from doing a darn thing.
All you can do is protect yourself and your family.

All you know is that your child has contracted a disease, a serious disease.
First you want to get the child treated and healthy.
Your husband needs to be treated, too.

So, say nothing, do nothing, wait, stay calm, be patient, and keep a close eye on your child.
You will at least keep the child safe, and you might learn something you don't know now.

As has been said, its the government's job to determine HOW your child got the disease.
That's very easy to do these days.
The disease can be examined, DNA testing can be used, and eventually many things can be revealed through scientific measures.
Those answers take time, so you must wait patiently.

I can assure you, once the scientists have conducted their testing and analysis, everyone will get rock solid answers.

Now, here's a few questions for you to ponder.
I don't want you to answer it here in public.
You simply consider it, and answer it only to your satisfaction.

When was the last time you and your husband had sexual intercourse?

Why don't you have the same disease as your husband?

How old is your child?

Have you asked the child about this?

Has your child been behaving ODDLY within the last three to six months, or longer?

Does your child appear to show fear when he or she is around certain people?

Have any unusual or strange characters had access alone with your child?

Please, just think about those questions.

You may to be able to answer them, but at lest think about them.

Don't discuss the questions with anyone, or reveal your answers to anyone, except your attorney (ONLY YOUR ATTORNEY) if you eventually hire one or get oen appointed to you by the court.
 
Thank you army again for your support.

I need one more question that can we go to a dr. who is a STD specialist and can examine all three of us and help us understanding the cause of all this happening?

But one of the lawyer is saying if we do that , this dr. will first file 51 A as an obligation. Is that true? If one 51A is already filed then what is the use of filing another 51A.

Thanks,
Gauri
 
The doctor most likely would report to social services. It is a legal requirement. Since social services is already aware it really is not a big deal if a new doctor does it again. Don't worry about the reporting- worry about getting your child adequate care.
As for the interviews, you may feel you have nothing to hide and want to cooperate, but you have absolutely nothing to gain and everything to lose by doing so. You do not have to prove your innocence to anyone. You do not need to hire an attorney yet- you can simply decline the interview. The attorney doesn't really become necessary unless things get worse. Just be prepared and know your rights.
Again, I would encourage you to utilize a counselor to speak with your child. A third party may have a better chance to get information from her that you can't get yourself. Kids can be full of secrets the same as adults.
 
Actually, I would consider getting that attorney on board sooner rather than later. Why? Because gonorrhea is typically spread only through sexual contact (or vaginal birth). If the child has gonorrhea, mom does not have gonorrhea, and dad does, this is NOT going away! Mom and dad have the right to avoid speaking with the police or DCFS, but, the authorities will almost certainly obtain a court order to examine and interview the child ... assuming MA allows such an order. Since, if we assume that mom and dad have an interest in covering up the crime (assuming there is one) and they might prevent the child from speaking to the police out of self interest - not the child's interest, the state may seek an GIL for the child and an order to examine and interview her in order to determine if the child is safe. It is also possible that the child could be removed from the home while the matter is being investigated.

If the situation is as the OP has stated, this is not going away, yet. As the guy that has to investigate these things here, I can say from many years of experience that this is very likely to get uglier quickly. And, quite frankly, I'd be very concerned for the welfare of that child and I would probably be working with child services to remove the child the moment mom and dad became uncooperative. So, they had better be ready, because the next step from the police and DCFS will likely be to seize the child for her safety.

Anyone looking at the scenario OBJECTIVELY from the outside should be very concerned! The odds are astronomical that the disease was passed along through sexual contact ... unless mom has an undiagnosed gonorrhea condition, or she had it at time of the daughter's birth but it was treated. Now, testing CAN determine whether dad's strain is the same as the child's and that might exonerate him. But, it could be that dad and the child were infected by the same source somewhere down the line and it wasn't dad that passed the ailment along.

Personally, I am scared for the welfare of this child. SOMETHING almost certainly happened to her - and it wasn't good. And if DCFS and the police are doing their job, they will act fast to protect the child ... and they should.
 
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Once again I direct you to Parentnook forums the person I am speaking about was falsely accused and child WAS taken from home while there was an investigation. This person might shed some light on what you can expect
 
Hello shrikmaster, can you please mention the name of the person as I couldn't find after spending sometime there. Thanks again!!
 
DCF people seems like reported to District attorney and they were supposed to call us. Its been three days no call. We hired an attorney, he left a message to DCF but no reply. We want our attorney to call them again but it seems like he want to wait till he gets a call back from DCF. Any suggestions?
 
gauri said:
DCF people seems like reported to District attorney and they were supposed to call us. Its been three days no call. We hired an attorney, he left a message to DCF but no reply. We want our attorney to call them again but it seems like he want to wait till he gets a call back from DCF. Any suggestions?
Click to expand...

Okay, I know you're anxious, upset, and disturbed by these events.
At this point, there's NOTHING more you can do.
This is where things could get harder, so you must be ready for whatever happens.
Things are no longer in your control.
Yes, that's difficult to hear and to face, but its the TRUTH.

So, here's what you must do.
If you are a person of faith, you begin to pray, reflect, draw upon your spirituality.
If you aren't a person of faith, you relax, continue your normal life, and wait.

If you or your husband are charged with a crime, or the state attempts to take your child from you (or, BOTH); you remain calm, admit to nothing, give no statements, do NOT discuss the case, and immediately say, "I INVOKE, and want to call my lawyer. I am going to avail myself of my right to remain silent."

The police or other government agents will use many tricks to get you to admit, stand firm, be polite, but continually request to speak to your lawyer, and say nothing more.

The DA could simply be reviewing the information the police have gathered, maybe deciding what to do next, or taking the matter to the grand jury.
In any case, as I said above, there is nothing you or your lawyer can do until you know what the DA and the sate does next!!!

By the way, you appear to have found a good lawyer, so take much comfort in that fact, too.
 
From this point on do not discuss this with anyone other than your attorney this includes here. In fact it might be helpful if you showed your Attorney what you have posted here
 

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