Ex husband wants to move back in WITH his new wife!

[bahadks]

Jurisdiction

Florida

My husband and I were divorced about 2 months ago. Two weeks after our divorce, he remarried. He moved out of the home approximately 6 months ago. The house is up for sale and we are to split the proceeds once it sells, however, it hasn't sold yet. My ex emailed me last week to tell me that he and his new wife are moving in! He said we can split the house and I can stay there four nights a week and they will stay here the other three. I have several concerns with this living arrangement:

• his new wife is diagnosed bipolar and goes off of her medication from time to time - I am afraid of her
• one of them has been going through my personal things
• I have lost my expectation of privacy and my comfort of being in my own home
• he is paying the mortgage, however, I pay for all of our son's college expense as well as most of the bills and expenses with the home
• they are using consumables in the home that I have paid for
• they make 5 times as much money as I do and can well afford a place of their own
• he left the home in September and has been gone since
• what is their motivation behind this?

I would like to file a motion for exclusive use and possession of the home, but I don't know how. I discussed the issue with my divorce case manager, and he was no help, even though the judge said at the divorce hearing that he reserved the right to hear anything further dealings with this case. I would really appreciate any help, advice or assistance.

Thank you for anyone's advice.

 

[mightymoose]

I say you'd be nuts to go along with it.

The house is already up for sale? Was this part of the divorce or just a mutual agreement?

Has he moved in yet? If not, take action to stop him. If he gets in the house will not sell and you will not get your portion.

 

[bahadks]

I say you'd be nuts to go along with it.

The house is already up for sale? Was this part of the divorce or just a mutual agreement?

Has he moved in yet? If not, take action to stop him. If he gets in the house will not sell and you will not get your portion.

 

[bahadks]

I definitely don't want to go along with it. Should I change the locks and have him arrested if he breaks in? Do I file a motion with the courts? If so, what and how? I'm not sure what to do or how to keep them out?

 

[army judge]

I definitely don't want to go along with it. Should I change the locks and have him arrested if he breaks in? Do I file a motion with the courts? If so, what and how? I'm not sure what to do or how to keep them out?

Until the house sells, you both own the home.

There might be a remedy, but YOU aren't equipped to seek it without a lawyer.

That said, the easiest play would be for you to vacate the home withon the next 24-48 hours to avoid an unpleasant confrontation.

Even if he were to bring his new squeeze into the home, there's little that can be done short of going to court.

I suggest you focus on what you can control.

Who was awarded use of the home pending its sale?

If the divorce decree was silent on that, the mess gets worse.

What you shouldn't do, absent a court order, is change the locks; UNLESS the decree gave you sole possession until the home sold.

You should scurry off and see a couple lawyers in PERSON tomorrow.

Even if there is a remedy, it'll take two to six weeks before the matter is adjudicated, maybe longer!

 

[zddoodah]

All of my comments below are based on two assumptions:

1. Title to the home is in both of your names.
2. Possession of the home pending sale was not addressed in the divorce decree.

If either or both of those things are not true, then my answers likely will change.

I have several concerns with this living arrangement

I didn't bother reading your list because your ex's proposal is patently silly on its face. Unfortunately, if possession of the home pending sale wasn't addressed in the divorce decree your ex is free to access the premises as he sees fit.

I would like to file a motion for exclusive use and possession of the home, but I don't know how.

Why on Earth wasn't this dealt with in the divorce decree?

I would really appreciate any help, advice or assistance.

Speak with a local family law attorney.

Should I change the locks and have him arrested if he breaks in?

Arrested for what? Breaking into a home that he owns? While you can change the locks, you have no apparent basis to exclude him from the home.

Do I file a motion with the courts? If so, what and how? I'm not sure what to do or how to keep them out?

If you want exclusive possession pending the sale, then that's what you need to ask for. A step-by-step "how to" guide is way beyond the scope of an internet message board. You need to consult with a local family law attorney (either that or spend a day or two at a local law library).

 

[bahadks]

Thank you for your comments. We originally agreed on how to split up our assets during the divorce and did not consult an attorney. Had friends that said do your best to keep the attorneys out of it. I understand now that that would've been an investment of $1000 to $1500 which would've been more than worth it. Friends told me the lawyers will get as much as they can out of you...up to $10-$20,000. We did not have the money to do that so we handled the divorce ourselves.

I had been living in the home for the past four months alone so I did not think that it was an issue. We did include in the decree that he would pay the mortgage, however, we did not address who would have exclusive use of the home. I never made the stretch that he and his current wife would want to move in with me!

I did contact an attorney today who informed me that I did have a few options none of which I can do on my own. Thank you everyone for your comments.