ex husband - harassment or not and what can i do?

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jerseycase

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I recently got divorced from my husband here in jersey and have one child. currently he gets alternate weekends and Wednesday afternoons which is fine by me. the only thing is that he keeps sending me emails in which he attempts to get me to communicate with him in other ways other than by email. Since the divorce was not a pleasant one i have no wish to communicate with him at all, however there is my son involved. He uses my son's welfare as a reason to attempt to communicate with me as well as threatening me with legal action should I continue to allow my parents to collect my son after his visitations and insisting that I should be personally there and alone to pick up my son instead of my parents who live with me and help take care of my son. The divorce settlement and custody says nothing about me having to personally pick up my son and I am afraid of getting myself into a situation where he and i are alone and as such would rather collect my son at a police station where I can feel comfortable. Unfortunately he is a lawyer [sorry to all those lawyers reading this] and feels no remorse about using legal jargon and threats to attempt to bully me into doing what he wants rather than what the letter of the divorce settlement stated. Is there anything that can be done to stop him from harassing me in this manner? he is quite sly and all of his letters are phrased in such a way that it is not a direct threat but at the same time the threat can be read 'between the lines'. Any ideas on what i can do will be appreciated.
 
I recently got divorced from my husband here in jersey and have one child. currently he gets alternate weekends and Wednesday afternoons which is fine by me. the only thing is that he keeps sending me emails in which he attempts to get me to communicate with him in other ways other than by email. Since the divorce was not a pleasant one i have no wish to communicate with him at all, however there is my son involved. He uses my son's welfare as a reason to attempt to communicate with me as well as threatening me with legal action should I continue to allow my parents to collect my son after his visitations and insisting that I should be personally there and alone to pick up my son instead of my parents who live with me and help take care of my son. The divorce settlement and custody says nothing about me having to personally pick up my son and I am afraid of getting myself into a situation where he and i are alone and as such would rather collect my son at a police station where I can feel comfortable. Unfortunately he is a lawyer [sorry to all those lawyers reading this] and feels no remorse about using legal jargon and threats to attempt to bully me into doing what he wants rather than what the letter of the divorce settlement stated. Is there anything that can be done to stop him from harassing me in this manner? he is quite sly and all of his letters are phrased in such a way that it is not a direct threat but at the same time the threat can be read 'between the lines'. Any ideas on what i can do will be appreciated.



Ignore him, and follow the dictates of your divorce decree, custody and support order.
Don't allow him to bully you.
He'll eventually get the message that you are not going to play his perverse, sick, and distorted game.
If he doesn't, so what?
Keep ignoring him and keep your distance.
If he pushes it, you can go to court and ask for all child exchanges to be done in a police building or before a police officer.
In the interim, silence is golden.
No one can use what you DON'T say against you!
 
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Still threatening

I have tried ignoring him by all means, even going as far as only communicating via email or text messages. But he still insists that he 'MUST' talk with me face to face otherwise he'll push for full custody or he'll keep taking me back to court with the intention of saying that I'm a bad mother for ignoring him when he wanted to discuss my son's 'health'. He constantly makes this threat and as such I am afraid. The last time I picked up my son, I asked the police for their assistance so that I would feel safe and now he's threatening me with a lawsuit saying my actions have 'defamed his character'. Is there no end to this??
 
jerseycase said:
I have tried ignoring him by all means, even going as far as only communicating via email or text messages. But he still insists that he 'MUST' talk with me face to face otherwise he'll push for full custody or he'll keep taking me back to court with the intention of saying that I'm a bad mother for ignoring him when he wanted to discuss my son's 'health'. He constantly makes this threat and as such I am afraid. The last time I picked up my son, I asked the police for their assistance so that I would feel safe and now he's threatening me with a lawsuit saying my actions have 'defamed his character'. Is there no end to this??

It'll end when your child reaches the age of majority.

Until then, however, this is the one you chose to inseminate you.

Now you're reaping the wisdom of that choice.

If it were me, I'd call his bluff.

I'd see him in court and allow him to make an idiot of himself.

I'd also never speak to him outside the presence of my attorney, holy man, holy woman, spiritual counselor, local law enforcement official, judge, life counselor, mother, father, or another trusted confidante.

Just because a person wants to speak with you, doesn't mean you have to speak with that person.

My standard response would always be, "We have nothing to talk about. Anything you need to communicate to me, must be directed to my attorney first, unless it's a genuine emergency about our child."




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