Divorced but sharing home with children and ex. He threatened a protection order to get me out

[MyKno18]

Jurisdiction

Alabama

We have shared custody and resided here for 2 years. I asked him to give me time to get a job, house, etc. The property belongs to him.He has called local police several times in two weeks. Accusations of hitting him and he thinks it isn't healthy for me to stay here any longer or with kids. What steps should I take to prevent a protection order or being homeless?

 

[army judge]

He has called local police several times in two weeks. Accusations of hitting him and he thinks it isn't healthy for me to stay here any longer or with kids.

What steps should I take to prevent a protection order or being homeless?

If the allegations are TRUE, I suggest you IMMEDIATELY (as in TODAY) contact a lawyer and file for divorce and emergency spousal support.

If you are alleged to have battered your husband, things will become very complicated for you.

In fact, he will likely be able to obtain an emergency order of protection requiring YOU to vacate the home on the date the order is issued.

He will probably get primary custody of the children, an order requiring YOU to pay child support, and another order requiring any visits with the children to be held in a child services offices under the guidance of a social worker; which you'll be required to pay.

Either way, you're going to need a lawyer, especially if YOU battered the male.



If you and the father aren't married, or were never married; you have very little wiggle room.

Again, you'll need a lawyer.

You'll also need to move ASAP, before you get evicted or required to move when he obtains an emergency order of protection.

DON'T resort to physical violence, unless it is required for self defense.

Get help today, as in an anger management course.

 

[zddoodah]

I think what you're saying is that you still live with your ex-husband in a residence he owns. That's almost never a good idea. You need to find yourself a new place lest he evict you or seek a restraining order. There is nothing you can do to prevent him from trying to do either of those things.

 

[ElleMD]

So in the two years you have been divorced you haven't made other living arrangements? Why on earth not? If lack of support was a barrier, that should have been addressed at the time of the divorce in the form of some duration of spousal support (alimony). Rarely is that indefinite but two years should have been plenty of time to make other living arrangements. I would suggest doing so now, be it with a friend or family member. You can't make him allow you to live there and if he gets you formally evicted you will find it even harder to find another rental.

 

[MyKno18]

So in the two years you have been divorced you haven't made other living arrangements? Why on earth not? If lack of support was a barrier, that should have been addressed at the time of the divorce in the form of some duration of spousal support (alimony). Rarely is that indefinite but two years should have been plenty of time to make other living arrangements. I would suggest doing so now, be it with a friend or family member. You can't make him allow you to live there and if he gets you formally evicted you will find it even harder to find another rental.

The day we signed the papers we were intimate and talking about our future. Shame on me for trusting him. He didn't want me to work. I agreed until our son started school. I wasn't aware he hired an attorney until Nov/16. January 2017 received final shared custody, $646.00 month for 2 children. Mind you he is telling me if we didn't follow thru with divorce he could lose his job because I am on the medical ins.
I told him about the affidavit of common law before 2017. He replied it's already done.

 

[Disabled Vet]

easy fix... Move out and your life will be much happier.

 

[leslie82]

We have shared custody and resided here for 2 years. I asked him to give me time to get a job, house, etc. The property belongs to him.He has called local police several times in two weeks. Accusations of hitting him and he thinks it isn't healthy for me to stay here any longer or with kids. What steps should I take to prevent a protection order or being homeless?

Why don't you just leave him on your own? Did you assault him? If you have joint custody then there isn't much he can do when it's time for visitation, etc.

Do you have family or friends who can help you? It doesn't sound like you two should be in a relationship or living together. There are resources to help find jobs, residences, etc.

 

[ElleMD]

The day we signed the papers we were intimate and talking about our future. Shame on me for trusting him. He didn't want me to work. I agreed until our son started school. I wasn't aware he hired an attorney until Nov/16. January 2017 received final shared custody, $646.00 month for 2 children. Mind you he is telling me if we didn't follow thru with divorce he could lose his job because I am on the medical ins.
I told him about the affidavit of common law before 2017. He replied it's already done.

If you were sleeping together and talking about your future, why on earth would you sign the divorce papers? You do what any number of other couples who reconciled have done and that is halt the divorce. In any case, at some point after that fateful day it became clear that this relationship was not going to work. At that point, a job and alternate living arrangements should have been your first priorities.