Kidnapping, Unlawful Detention Man fakes his kidnapping to avoid work!

army judge

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Arizona
arizona-fake-kidnapping-44.jpg

arizona-fake-kidnapping-43.jpg


There's hating your job — and then there's this guy.

An Arizona man was so desperate to get out of work that he staged his own kidnapping, authorities said.

Brandon Soules, 19, was found with his hands tied up behind his back with a belt and a banana in his mouth near a water tower earlier this month in Coolidge, the Casa Grande Dispatch reported.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: The banana stuffed in his mouth was, in my view, an especially elegant touch.


He told authorities that two masked men had kidnapped him, hit his head and knocked him unconscious, the outlet reported.

The men then drove him around before dumping him where he was found, Soules said.

But after conducting an investigation, detectives found no evidence the kidnapping occurred, the outlet reported.

Soules then confessed to authorities that he made up the story in order to get out of work, the outlet reported.

He was arrested on Feb. 17 on suspicion of false reporting to police.

https://nypost.com/2021/02/22/arizona-man-faked-own-kidnapping-to-get-out-of-work-report/
 
AUTHOR'S NOTE: The banana stuffed in his mouth was, in my view, an especially elegant touch.

Other articles from Coolidge say bandana, which makes more sense.

Coolidge is a small town about an hour's drive southeast of central Phoenix. Population about 13,000. Home to the Casa Grande Ruins National Monument.
 
Other articles from Coolidge say bandana, which makes more sense.

Coolidge is a small town about an hour's drive southeast of central Phoenix. Population about 13,000. Home to the Casa Grande Ruins National Monument.


Nevertheless, the banana stuffed in his piehole created a visual image that made me giggle, guffaw, chuckle, and howl.

It also made me recall a defendant I represented in 1995.

I'll call him "Jean Yuss".

Jean decides to commit an armed robbery of a convenience store to get money for his "crack" habit.
Problem is, Jean doesn't have a firearm.
Jean decides to rob the store with a (wait for it) "banana in his pocket".
Things immediately went sour for Jean, as he shouted, "Gimme your money, or I gonna take your life!"
The clerk had been robbed a dozen times over the previous year.
So, the clerk is packing a Glock.
Clerk pulls out his Glock and tells Jean, "Not tonight MoFo, not tonight."
Jean throws up his hands and says, "I quit."
Another clerk had seen the confrontation and called "911".
Cops arrive, arrest Jean, and I catch lightening in a bottle and become Jean's court appointed counsel.

Jean had warrants for other felonies from drug possession, theft by deception, sexual battery, two other armed robberies (which is why Jean had no firearm, cops seized two from prior cases), and other assorted felonies.

Jean was among the top ten of criminal defendants I encountered.
 
I'd really like to know where he worked that was so bad he was willing to snag a criminal charge rather than just taking a day off.

I found other articles that revealed that he worked for The Tire Factory (tires and auto repair) in Coolidge. He was fired after his arrest so he got his wish after all. He doesn't have to go back to work there. There's no indication as to what his job was but, at 19, I imagine it was grunt work with tires rather than auto repair.
 
I would think just calling in sick would have worked out better for him. Now he has no job and he is facing what I assume are serious criminal charges.
 
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