Suddenly the biological father is threatening to file for custody

I have a 16 month-old daughter from my exboyfriend of 5 years. We were never married. When I got pregnant he threatened to leave me unless I had an abortion, and when I decided to have the baby he dumped me. We have never gotten back together, but I have always believed our daughter should have a relationship with her father. We signed a declaration of paternity at the hospital and his name is on our daughter's birth certificate.

He paid no child support and only came to see her a few times until she reached one, then he suddenly started to threaten to sue for custody so I suggested we draw up an agreement. We agreed that I would have custody and he would have visitation rights 2 days per week. Additionally, we would trade holidays, splitting them equally, and he would pay $180 on the 1st of each month for child support. This was a written agreement made completely outside of the courts.

In practice he consistently picks her up late, drops her off early and is at least 2 weeks late with the CS check. He's changed his days of visitation 3 times, and I've always accommodated him, hoping to keep our daughter happy and us out of court.

Now he is suddenly threatening to sue for custody again. He says he will win custody because I have a full-time job and leave our daughter with my live-in nanny during work hours, while he is minimally employed with a part time job. He says I will have to pay him child support since I make more money than he does.

I can see that we need to have something officially decided so that he stops making threats, but I'm scared to take that step. Are his claims grounded? Can he win custody of our daughter?

This is why agreements outside of the courts is a terrible idea.

First, file for CS through your local CSE. You should be getting more than $180/mo and they might base CS off full time employment.

Then file a parenting plan/custody worksheet through the courts.

Sure, he could always ask for custody I suppose but does he have a good chance of getting it?

Probably not.

On another note, if he only works part time, he should be providing child care for the child instead of a nanny. If it will save you on paying a sitter, maybe that can be worked out in the CS. This might be something to toss up.