From the girlfriend

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lindzy998

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My boyfriend, D, and I have been dating for a few months now and he has a son ,B. He and the mother were never married and they are close to their last court date to settle the custody. D's lawyer told him that B was not allowed to be around significant others on either side. I was curious if they have the right to do this. I have never been in any trouble with the law except for a couple speeding tickets so there should be no reason to think I would put B in any kind of harm. I understand waiting until we are serious before meeting B but it has been almost 5 months since me and D started getting serious. And if they do have the right, how much longer will I have to wait before meeting B?
 
This is common, especially if the child is young.
Your boyfriend needs to address this issue at court if it is causing a problem. The order is in effect until the court lifts it- so he needs to give them a reason to lift it.
It works both ways though, so he won't get to complain about the riff raff the child's mother brings around.
 
Then your BF (not you) needs to take up the violation in court. do yourself and BF a BIG favor stay out of this! Your involvement will only hurt your BF not help. I understand you care and have feelings but this is between Mom and Dad.
 
Your boyfriend needs to handle this with his lawyer through the court system.
 
My boyfriend, D, and I have been dating for a few months now and he has a son ,B. He and the mother were never married and they are close to their last court date to settle the custody. D's lawyer told him that B was not allowed to be around significant others on either side. I was curious if they have the right to do this. I have never been in any trouble with the law except for a couple speeding tickets so there should be no reason to think I would put B in any kind of harm. I understand waiting until we are serious before meeting B but it has been almost 5 months since me and D started getting serious. And if they do have the right, how much longer will I have to wait before meeting B?

Your "friend" would be wise to heed his lawyer's admonition, if he wants things to go well for him.
South Carolina has some very strict and stringently applied laws in this regard.
Your state's custody laws are also newly adopted (about two years ago).
It has NOTHING to do with how good or bad the friend is or was.
It has more to do with morality.
The best thing you can do is to stay neutral and advise your friend to speak only to his lawyer about this matter.
SC considers its laws to be in the best interests of the child.
It doesn't speak to the issue of SO, which is as meaningful as "flavor of the day".

The SC law:

http://www.gregoryforman.com/faqs/how-is-child-custody-determined/

http://millonzilaw.wordpress.com/20...custody-law-parenting-plans-start-next-month/

http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/ofw/...na-divorce/south-carolina-child-custody-laws/

http://www.divorcenet.com/resources/child-custody/child-custody-basics/child-custody-south-carolina-

http://www.scstatehouse.gov/code/t63c015.php
 
My boyfriend, D, and I have been dating for a few months now and he has a son ,B. He and the mother were never married and they are close to their last court date to settle the custody. D's lawyer told him that B was not allowed to be around significant others on either side. I was curious if they have the right to do this. I have never been in any trouble with the law except for a couple speeding tickets so there should be no reason to think I would put B in any kind of harm. I understand waiting until we are serious before meeting B but it has been almost 5 months since me and D started getting serious. And if they do have the right, how much longer will I have to wait before meeting B?

Your "friend" would be wise to heed his lawyer's admonition, if he wants things to go well for him.
South Carolina has some very strict and stringently applied laws in this regard.
Your state's custody laws are also newly adopted (about two years ago).

It has NOTHING to do with how good or bad the friend is or was.
It has more to do with morality.
The best thing you can do is to stay neutral and advise your friend to speak only to his lawyer about this matter.

One last thing, people don't always tell the truth.
If I don't know FIRST hand, I usually suspect I;m being lied to or deceived.
Don't assume anything until you know for sure yourself.

SC considers its laws to be in the best interests of the child.
It doesn't speak to the issue of SO, which is as meaningful as "flavor of the day".

The SC law:

http://www.gregoryforman.com/faqs/how-is-child-custody-determined/

http://millonzilaw.wordpress.com/20...custody-law-parenting-plans-start-next-month/

http://www.ourfamilywizard.com/ofw/...na-divorce/south-carolina-child-custody-laws/

http://www.divorcenet.com/resources/child-custody/child-custody-basics/child-custody-south-carolina-

http://www.scstatehouse.gov/code/t63c015.php
 
My boyfriend, D, and I have been dating for a few months now and he has a son ,B. He and the mother were never married and they are close to their last court date to settle the custody. D's lawyer told him that B was not allowed to be around significant others on either side. I was curious if they have the right to do this. I have never been in any trouble with the law except for a couple speeding tickets so there should be no reason to think I would put B in any kind of harm. I understand waiting until we are serious before meeting B but it has been almost 5 months since me and D started getting serious. And if they do have the right, how much longer will I have to wait before meeting B?


They cannot restrict you - but they can indeed restrict Dad (which amounts to the same thing).

I disagree that this is common. It's common when the parents are married and divorcing, yes, but not when they were never wed to begin with.
 
Not around a significant other at all or not allowed overnights? Seems rather strict if they cannot be around at all.
 
This is not likely an order the court generated, but one mom and dad came up with as they argued over petty things in mediation. They both agreed to it and have themselves to blame.
In my area I see this sort of thing all the time when separation is in the early stages and the kids are very young. Sometimes the restriction only applies to the child exchange itself, not the entire visit.
In reality, the rule is not easy to enforce.
 
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