Wanting to move to Cyprus with 3 kids

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needachange

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Hello, I do not have an attorney yet and am just seeking some legal advice.

I have three children, my oldest is not my boyfriend's child but the other two are. I am wanting to move to Cyprus, Malta or Canada with all three children. I, by no means, want to steal my boys away from their father but I want to know if I have the legal right to do so since we have never been married. My boyfriend is named on both of the boy's birth certificates. We have been together for 11 years and as far as I know, in Indiana, we are not subject to common law marriage. My boyfriend has a drinking problem, anger problems and suffers from periods of depression and I do not want to put him through the scrutiny of a custody fight and just want to see what my options are before doing so. I want this to be as amicable as possible.
 
Being un married has nothing to do with parental rights. You had kids out of wedlock, Dad has rights. You have virtually no chance of moving the kids out of the country without Dad's permission. Dad's issues have nothing to do with this because you do not need to move the kids out of the country to break up with Dad. How will Dad see the kids? Why are you moving and why the range of countries? I do not see how the move is in the kids best interest.
 
I could fly in and let the kids see their father. I like these countries and that is why I am considering them. As I stated above, I do not want to take the kids from him but I just wanted to know if there is an amicable way to move out of the country. I want to move out of the country to make a better life for me and my children. I have been threatened if I were to ever leave their father and it would be near impossible for him to harm me if I were out of the country.

As for you not seeing this move as in the children's best interests. Have you ever considered that the children's mother being happy and at peace with herself is in their best interest? I have been in an unhealthy and unhappy relationship for years and I don't see this as being a good role model to my children. To let them grow up with a father that drinks and gets angry all the time I do not see as in their best interest. When their dad gets mad, he throws things, breaks things, shouts at me and the kids and this is all on a regular basis. I don't see any of that as being in their best interest.

I know it sounds like I am being a cold hearted b**** here but I really am not trying to be. I want my kids to know their father but think that time away would definitely do them some good.
 
You can't take the children out of the country (and in some cases from one state to another) unless the other (or in this case all parents) parent agrees.

If you do so without the appropriate approvals, you subject yourself to criminal penalties, should the other dads pursue criminal and civil actions against you!


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OP, family courts do not commonly permit parents to relocate with the child to another country without the other parent's permission.

When it does happen - and it's not common - more often than not it's a military move, and the CP has been married for awhile, and the NCP has had little-to-no contact with the child in question.

YOUR wish for happiness has no bearing whatsoever on the matter in all honesty - you created a child and that child's other parent also has rights. Yours don't supersede his, and vice versa. You will also need permission from the father/s of the other two children.

For what it's worth..the courts will look at this as:

"Ma'am, you chose this guy to be Daddy. You thought he was good enough Daddy material, so unless you can show that he's unfit, he's got just as many rights - should he exercise those rights - to his child as do you".

See where I'm coming from?
 
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There is absolutely no proof that moving to a foreign country, to which neither you or the kids have any support system in, is better for you. Your chances of moving to any random country are virtually ZERO. You have 2 huge battles to fight, with both Dads, and your chances of being able to relocate solely for your happiness (who cares if the kids are miserable and away from their Dad right) are almost zero. If one or all these countries are not a part of the Hague convention, your chances are almost zero.

you do sound like you are cold hearted, completely clueless, and trying to take the kids away from their Dads. Luckily almost all courts will not permit a move that is in your best interest only, and not the kids. It is not going to be hard for either Dad to fight this and win.

If you want to move that bad, you will have to turn custody over to the fathers. Are you actually serious in thinking you have any chance of moving with the kids to some random country, with no family support, going against 2 dads? I think you need a reality check big time.
 
And this doesn't even touch on the whole immigration issue...it's not as if a random person can simply up and leave and decide to live in X country.

It just doesn't happen that way.
 
I was here looking for legal advice as to whether or not it was possible for me to do so, not for your personal judgments on my character. I got my answer and that's all I needed. I was fairly certain that it was not possible but I don't need the personal attacks on my character. If I wanted that, I would stay in my current situation.

Just so you all know, I only have ONE father to fight here, my daughter's father is not in the picture and he never has even seen her or wanted to see her.

Thanks to those that actually answered without judging me. I'm done.
 
I was here looking for legal advice as to whether or not it was possible for me to do so, not for your personal judgments on my character. I got my answer and that's all I needed. I was fairly certain that it was not possible but I don't need the personal attacks on my character. If I wanted that, I would stay in my current situation.

Just so you all know, I only have ONE father to fight here, my daughter's father is not in the picture and he never has even seen her or wanted to see her.

Thanks to those that actually answered without judging me. I'm done.



I think you're going to be very, very disappointed.
 
needachange i know its hard when all you want is some advice and all you're getting is judged and harrassed over a question you'd really just like a simple answer to. Not to mention you get bashed with a bunch of questions about your question. Which I really feel most of the time is uneeded. As far a your questions goes unfortunetly they're right. It is nearly impossible for you to take the two out of state or country because the father has to give permission. I know that much. The father also would have to give permission for a visa for them even if you were even just going to travel outside the country with them. It's rough. As far as I know theres really no way around it. Unless the father doesn't care and gives permission I dont know what else you could do. Sound like the father has a good deal of problems I'm not sure how hard a custody battle would be against someone like that. even if you have or gain full custody you would still need his permission. whatever happens good luck!
 
I think you're going to be very, very disappointed.

I think it's pretty clear after her last comment that she doesn't care what you think and thats not why she's here. Plus it sounds like she already knows the deal so I don't think it can really be much more disappointing than it already is for her.
 
I think it's pretty clear after her last comment that she doesn't care what you think and thats not why she's here. Plus it sounds like she already knows the deal so I don't think it can really be much more disappointing than it already is for her.


Did you have a point?
 
first and formost if u are concerned for the safety of you and the children contact the authorities and get a order of protection if u are not safe in you're home and do not have a friend or family member that u would feel safe with contact a local dv shelter... there is no reason in this day and age for a woman/man ect to live and deal with physical or emotional abuses with all the available assistance at hand.


as far as you're question u will not be permitted to exit the country and sometimes state without his permission and signature on the visa unless he is stripped of his parental rights (which is almost a imposable action) even crackheads get supervised visits most times.
 
first and formost if u are concerned for the safety of you and the children contact the authorities and get a order of protection if u are not safe in you're home and do not have a friend or family member that u would feel safe with contact a local dv shelter... there is no reason in this day and age for a woman/man ect to live and deal with physical or emotional abuses with all the available assistance at hand.


as far as you're question u will not be permitted to exit the country and sometimes state without his permission and signature on the visa unless he is stripped of his parental rights (which is almost a imposable action) even crackheads get supervised visits most times.

Is there any reason you can't use proper spelling when you post advice? Is it REALLY that hard to write "you" as opposed to "u"? ???

Please remember you are on a professional site and not "MySpace". :)
 
Is there any reason you can't use proper spelling when you post advice? Is it REALLY that hard to write "you" as opposed to "u"? ???

Please remember you are on a professional site and not "MySpace". :)


Dyanna also gave incorrect advice (again)....

..OP, if you have SOLE custody you can apply for a passport (and thus take the child both out of state, and out of the country on vacation, without your ex's permission - though in some cases you may need permission from the courts).

What is assured, is that you likely will NOT be allowed to relocate outside of the country with the child.

On another note, Bay...is your k-dar going off at all?
 
Is there any reason you can't use proper spelling when you post advice? Is it REALLY that hard to write "you" as opposed to "u"? ???

Please remember you are on a professional site and not "MySpace". :)

You're seriously going to cry over someone useing "u" instead of you? Come on now that's just petty. How bout we focus on the true reason people are here and thats for advice. Not spelling lessons.
 
im sorry youre life is that lonely that u have so much time in youre life that you feel the need to troll a website looking for someone who spells u instead of you when refering to someone. if your life is so sad that u spend hours apon hours with only this to fill your time, that is trully and utterly pathetic.

may u suggest a few things lol

1. a cat
2. a bridge night with the other local lonely ladies
3. go to bingo
4. join a quilting club
5. a book club

and please remember this is a proffesional website and when someone is dealing with a issue so severe and important as insisting someone recieve help in a domestic violence situation, u should perhaps save your utterly useless ( to this matter ) personal attacks for a different stage.
 
im sorry youre life is that lonely that u have so much time in youre life that you feel the need to troll a website looking for someone who spells u instead of you when refering to someone. if your life is so sad that u spend hours apon hours with only this to fill your time, that is trully and utterly pathetic.

may u suggest a few things lol

1. a cat
2. a bridge night with the other local lonely ladies
3. go to bingo
4. join a quilting club
5. a book club

and please remember this is a proffesional website and when someone is dealing with a issue so severe and important as insisting someone recieve help in a domestic violence situation, u should perhaps save your utterly useless ( to this matter ) personal attacks for a different stage.


Sorry, guys...but this was quotalicious.

Dyanna, if you wish to help - and believe me, as a volunteer myself I think it's awesome that you do wish to help others - you MUST give correct information. And as you've been somewhat...lax...in this area, all I can do is hope that you read this and start researching more.

Google is your friend, and so is Lexis.
 
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