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  1. #1

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    restraining order across state lines?

    My jurisdiction is: Texas

    Hello. I am living in Texas. My husband's ex girlfriend lives in Ohio. My husband is active duty Military. He just returned home from Iraq in January. He has a former "girlfriend" in Ohio. She is familiar with his family (their Mothers were friends for many years). When this woman learned about our marriage, she threatened revenge on my husband "for what he did to her" ie- he didn't marry her. Before he met me, apparently, she wanted to get married and it didn't work out.



    As per my Mother in Law, they weren't as serious as this girl had thought. She went and bought herself an engagement ring and started ordering a wedding gown at one point (unbeknownst to my husband or his family until after the fact). I am mentioning those things so you can see what kind of person we are dealing with.. not intended to embarrass or berate her.

    I am now pregnant and she found out (via the Mothers talking). Things have escalated. She is bi-polar and while I've tried to be compassionate to that, I cannot risk my health during my pregnancy (or our safety after our child's birth). She has been calling people, writing letters to his commander and posting veiled threats on several social networking websites. It seems that I cannot get away from this woman. It's always something. I do not want to ignore this, as I have been... I am unsure of her stability.

    We are moving back to NY in January of 2010 (which is much closer to Ohio than Texas). What are my options as far as restraining orders? Thank you in advance. As I said, I've been dealing with this for over a year now and just cannot let it go on.. especially with my pregnancy. If I weren't pregnant and things hadn't escalated due to that fact, I wouldn't be so worried.

    -S

  2. Moderator Honorable Scholar

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    If she has not been calling you directly, coming to your home, or making threats to you through third parties, there may be little that you CAN do. Laws regarding internet harassment vary by state, and it will depend on the state you are living in and the state in which she lives to determine which state's laws have jurisdiction if it comes to it. Chances are, that won't go anywhere if all she is doing is being a raging witch.

    People have a right to be annoying, angry, and obnoxious to a degree. Without her actually calling or contacting you, it might be nearly impossible to get a restraining order that will prevent her from posting her frustration on the internet or relating to others how she feels wronged.

    Now, if she has posted knowing falsehoods and you can articulate damages, then you might be able to sue her for libel. But, that's something you will have to speak with an attorney about.

    It might be best to just ignore her. If she posts to sites, don't read them. Ask friends not to relate what she writes. Your husband has almost certainly talked to his command about the situation, so that should be done with. Eventually, if she is getting ignored, she just might go away.

    Good luck.

    - Carl
    **********
    A Nor Cal Cop Supervisor

    "Make mine a mocha ...
    And a croissant!"

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to CdwJava For This Useful Post:

    whisper1970 (06-08-2009)

  4. #3

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    She's emailed me in the past.. to let me know what kind of husband I married. LOL It was before I was pregnant and hormonal... so I thanked her kindly and laughed it off. She's texted him. All in the past.. so I wouldn't even consider using that against her. I meant what I said about feeling sorry for her. I guess it topped everything off when she sent a letter to his commanding officer. Why she would think the Military would care what she had to say.. I guess I shouldn't care either. As I said.. pregnancy causes raging hormones.

    I do want to thank you for putting everything in proper perspective for me. And yes, I will tell my friends to stop relaying her nonsense. They really mean well and are being protective.

    Thanks so much!!

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