Change of custody, father neglectful

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dirwin

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We originally lived in Oklahoma and when we first divorced, I had primary custody with the father paying over $700 in child support for three children, plus he had to keep insurance on them and pay 70% of the medical bills. I then remarried and was going to move to another country. The children's father agreed that once I was established in the other country that he would agree for the children to live with me there and he signed for their passports. However, he talked to his attorney and I was then informed that if I was leaving the country the custody of the children needed to change over to him until such time as I became established. I contacted an attorney for myself and an agreement was arranged. I was to pay just over $200 in child support. After two months I returned to the United States to stay and divorced. My ex husband and I had an arrangement for about 6 months that consisted of one child being with me in my home which included all the norms of living with a parent. The other two children came to my house every day after school, ate dinner at my house, I did their laundry, took them to appointments, etc. and then for bed time they returned to their fathers house to sleep and get up for school the next morning. No child support was paid either way. In October 2004 I moved to Wyoming with my youngest child choosing to go with me so that I could take care of my dying aunt. I then established a very good job at the prison. In June 2005 both the other children came to live with me with the oldest being 16 and pregnant. Come end of December 2005 I had all three children and my grandson living with me and I had a fiance. The children's father was and is not paying any child support as we have not gone back to court to change the custody and support. My oldest turned 18 in April 2007 and got married in June 2007. I still have a 15 and 16 year old living with me and in September 2007 I married. I have decided that I am tired of being patient with my ex husband. He doesn't call the kids and never has unless they called him first and asked him to call them back. He has never paid for their plane tickets, my husband and I have. We have even taken the children down to Oklahoma to visit. My ex husband came one time to see his grandson for 2 1/2 days then left with his girlfriend to visit her adult son for 7 days in Arizona. The childrens father is always saying he doesn't have any money to pay for plane tickets, to come visit or to pay child support. He has claimed children on his income tax. He has given me about 2500 since 2005 with most of it being after he got his taxes and I had to threaten to turn him in to IRS. My children have informed me that when they are at their fathers house in Oklahoma his girlfriend doesn't work most of the time and she goes shopping for herself to buy expensive items. The kids know their dad doesn't pay child support and I have him tell them he can't buy their plane tickets. This year for x-mas he told my youngest daughter that it wasn't worth $600 for them to go visit him for only 10 days. They want to visit so they can see their grandmother who is going to pass away soon (his mother). He has now made a deal with our daughter that if she pays for her ticket with her work money then he will try to pay for our son's ticket. My patience has run out and I am tired of talking to him about how he can't afford to pay child support or pay for tickets and I am tired of him hurting our children. He has worked for the same company for over 15 years and makes over $22 an hour that I know of..could be more now. He has no one to support but his girlfriend. My present husband has $800 taken directly out of his check to pay child support to his 2 children in Massachusetts and he has helped me support my children without question. My problem is the original decree and modification is in Oklahoma and I am in Wyoming. I want to take this to court pro se but how can I when I am so far from Oklahoma.
 
So you were going to move the kids to another country and that relationship did not even work out?

If the divorce was done out of OK then that state retains jurisdiction. You have several issues here that you need to address but OK has jurisdiction. Dad's girlfriend has nothing to do with this. You need to file for child support and custody if you are not getting it. Be advised though that since you are the one that moved, you could be on the hook for transportation costs.
 
So how am I suppose to do this in Oklahoma when I am in Wyoming. I moved to take care of family but now am established with the prison as a caseworker. There are no good paying jobs in Oklahoma so can not move back for financial reasons. I do not have the money to travel to Oklahoma to do all of this. I have already been stuck with all the transportation costs and cost of raising children. I need to get change of custody and child support. I only mentioned the gf due to his always stating he has no money and he basically has no contact with the children unless they contact him.
 
Call the clerk's office where you originally filed in OK to see what you need to do to transfer the case to your state.
 
Can't change it to Wyoming. Have to do modification in Oklahoma. The only thing Wyoming can do is enforce the child support once granted. I have contacted attorneys in Oklahoma to help but they want a retainer fee that I do not have. Legal Aid will only help with domestic violence cases at this time. There are no forms to help guide in doing my own filing in Oklahoma and since there are some complications I have been told it would be better to have an attorney. How am I suppose to do this without money? How am I to get my children the support they need and deserve.
 
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