Fiance's grandmother accused me of child molestation

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kbrown1212

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I am not here to complain or get pitty. I want good advice on what to do. Here's what happened.

I am 22 years old. Been with my fiance since I was 19 - he had a ten month old boy at the time - the mother was unfit and took off and landed in jail many times. He has always called me mommy - and he is my son (though not biologically or adoptive).

Back in the end of April, my fiance's grandmother accused myself of child molestation on his son who i have raised for 4 years (4 1/2 now). Dyfs, attorneys, etc. cleared me and dropped the case. We had a horrible time going through DYFS investigations, etc. They even said horrible things about his father, my fiance. They are still harassing me through him... in addition to him. I would like it to stop and would like to seek money or action against them for the embarrassment, stress, health problems, job problems they put me though. I have severe anxiety/panic disorder and this uproar has hurt me (not as much as the kid though - he has been very upset/change of moods because of this). The crazy great grandmother is trying to get custody/visitation of him - take him away from his loving family. It stresses me every day for the last 4 months. I had severe health problems due to this and even landed in the hospital with a near nervous breakdown/ severe IBS/sever panic attack. I have evidence of all sorts - but I'm afraid it's not enough. I want to sue her - for defamation of character. there is nothing more life altering and heart sinking than seeing your name next to possible molester. Not a day has been the same since that. That will always be on record - I feel like they have destroyed my image - and that they should pay for days of work i missed due to the health problems and days we went to seek legal advice, etc. Mostly, they should pay for what they did to this 4 1/2 year old who does not deserve to see his parents at the police station and be asked horrible questions.

Please - any advice would be most helpful - i want the phone calls to stop - the threats to stop - and the slander, and libel to stop!
 
It would cost you a fortune in attorney's fees to sue, and would take a long time with no guarantee of the outcome.

If members of your boyfriend's family have been so abusive, I would suggest that the two of you cut off any contact with them. Don't visit, don't allow them to visit. Block their calls on your phones. You may even want to move if possible.

You may also be able to get a restraining order. Check at your county court house for the forms, or consult with a lawyer.

Good luck. I hope you can put them behind you. :)
 
In addition, great grandmother hasn't a chance to get custody of this boy.

While you have no legal rights to this child, his father has custody of the child and has not legally been declared an unfit father. Great grandma can go pound sand.

As previously suggested, it would be quite expensive and time consuming to attempt what you wish to do. Take the easier route. Stop dealing with these people; buy an answering machine, shut off the ringer on your phone and screen all your calls, immediately deleting those from the crazy side of his family.

Gail
 
Thanks for the replies.

She left 5 messages on his phone talking to herself and "George Bush" on his answering machine. Pretty insane.

As much as I'd like to take them to court, you're right. My fiance's mother said last night she believes he should press charges against her for harassing or the like. It's unbearable. The daycare is instructed to not let them in, although they stalk outside and do attempt to try. It's completely ridiculous.

About the custody - that comment makes me feel better. Visitation however - aren't there grand parental laws or something of the sort?

And we tried restraining order. the police departments AND courts say that he can't do it against his family members.
 
Some states do recognize grandparent rights in specific situations. I don't think you have to worry about that.

I'm surprised about the restraining order. It doesn't make any sense to me. I suggest you speak to an attorney.
 
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